At Fault

January 7th 2019

My head pounded as the sound of birds arose me from my somewhat sound sleep. Groaning I slightly sat up, my eyes barely managing to adjust to the blinding brightness before me. Quietly caressing my forehead, I slowly skimmed my surroundings as the pounding in my head increased. It felt as though someone was using a jackhammer on it. Confused, I furrowed my brows as I stared at the familiar blue walls around me. Thoughts rushed through my clouded mind as I tried to recollect any memories from the previous night.

As I was caught in my train of thought, footsteps could suddenly be heard on the other side of the door. For each passing second, getting louder and coming closer, until they stopped. Silence. Nothing but the swift beating of my heart, nearly pounding itself out of my constricting chest. Without warning, the door was swung open with full force, only to reveal the worried face of my mother.

As soon as she noticed my waken state, relief filled her face. "Lexi! You're finally awake!" She exclaimed, her voice full of shock and joy. Sighing in relief, she barged over to my bed and hugged me, with as much power and love as one could muster, until I could barely breathe. Baffled, I returned the hug, finding comfort in my mother's tight embrace. "You had us worried honey" She softly whispered into my ear, her voice cracking at the end as tears threatened to escape through her eyes and down her already tear-stained cheeks.

When she finally let go of me, she stroked my cheek as she tucked a loose piece of hair behind my ear. "Please do not ever scare us like that again, Lex." She whispered while searching my eyes for any doubt. Despite my lacking memories, I replied: "I won't." My voice sounded hoarse due to my dry throat, making my voice nearly inaudible. Upon seeing the confusion written on my face, she once more tightly embraced me and whispered into my ear "I'm going to go downstairs and let your father know that you are awake. Come down whenever you are ready, honey." Giving my hand an encouraging squeeze, she reassuringly smiled at me, before turning around and leaving the room without another word.

As the pounding in my head returned once more, I groaned, at last leaving the warm comfort of my bed. As I entered my bathroom, I was met by an unrecognisable sight before me. Where there usually stood a happy and bright girl, there now stood a pale girl, with black bags beneath her bloodshot eyes. Rubbing my eyes, I sighed, mustering up as much energy as I could in my tired state, and got into the shower. As the warm water hit my cold skin, goosebumps filled my body, as I washed away all the events of the previous night.

Upon finishing my shower, I took another glance at the unrecognisable reflection in the mirror, before entering my room. Changing into a hoodie and some sweats, I finally decided to muster up the courage to go downstairs and face the wrath of my parents. As I left the safety of my room and walked towards the staircase, the more anxious, I got, as thoughts once more rushed through my mind.

What happened last night? How did I get home?

As I reached the final step of the staircase, I was met by the hushed tones of my parents, quietly talking in the kitchen. Feeling my presence, when I entered the room, both my parents grew silent. However, I was quickly met by my father's worrisome face and his protective arms which engulfed me into the safety of his embrace. Snuggling into the comfort of his chest, I weakly smiled as he stroke my hair. After a few moments, we pulled apart, and my parents gestured for me to sit with them at the table.

Carefully looking between each other, they glanced at me before my mother took a deep breath and stared into me with her eyes full of concern and disappointment as she recalled the previous night.

Her eyes bored into my soul as she spoke, her voice serious yet full of anguish "Your friends found you passed out in the bathroom due to some drugs which you willingly took last night". My father disappointedly shook his head as my mother frustratedly ran her hands through her hair while I processed the information.