Chapter 1
"...but then he might think i'm trying too hard, but if i go as like the girl next door he might not notice me at all. what do you think Liz? ... liz? ....HELLO LIZ!?!"
Maddie's shouting shocked me back to reality, we were sat in a cafe having drinks, talking about the upcoming party, somewhere in the conversation i had drifted off, apparently to Maddie's displeasure.
i looked over at my friend, my best and only friend, she was shorter, 5'5. with wavy blonde hair that went just past her shoulders and green eyes. her features were very soft and she was about as pale as they come, which made her eyes stand out more.she was slim, but not skinny, and entirely flat.
"sorry Mad's, what were you saying?"
"seriously Liz? i'm having a crisis and you're off in your own head!" she said with with a small pout and a sigh.
as Maddie composed herself and readied to tell me about her "crisis" i couldn't help but notice our stark contrast in the mirror across the cafe. where Maddie was 5'5 i was 5'8. with her blonde wavy hair and my straight as a stick coal black hair that reached my waist. her green eyes vs my deep brown eyes, her soft features vs my more pronounced ones, her eyes were wide and innocent, and mine were more almond shaped, slanted slightly and more sultry looking. while our body size was not that different, with us both being slim, i had curves where she had none.
"ok, so."
i dragged my gaze from the mirror and focused on my friend.
"spill" i said, and lifted my ice coffee to my lips, savoring the caffeine.
"Brendon's going to be at the party tonight, and i heard he broke up with Selena a few days ago, that means it wont be long until he gets into a relationship, the party is the perfect place for me to grab his attention, so, do i wear the red dress, you know the one? or do you think that will make me look like i'm trying too hard? OR, should i opt for a more casual mini skirt? but then that could mean i don't catch his attention. do you see my dilemma ??? what should i do?"
for the first time since Maddie started talking she allowed herself to breathe. i gently placed my coffee back on the table between us and looked Maddie dead in the eyes.
Maddie had been in love with Brendon since she was 12, we were both 17 now. in all the time i've known Maddie she has only ever liked one guy, Brendon. sure, he's good looking, but 5 years never touching another guy good looking? no.
"Mad's, i'm going to tell you something and i want you to listen."
Maddie leaned forward on her chair eagerly, with her elbows on the table and her head resting on her knuckles. she gave a slight nod to indicate that she was ready.
"wear. whatever. the. fuck. makes. you. happy."
"ughhhhhhhh" she let out a groan and slumped back into her chair. "Liv you know how much of a big deal this is too me!"
"i do." i said leaning back in my own chair. " which is why you should listen to me. honestly you know i don't believe in love, and i think the fact that you're still pining over the same guy is a pathetic waste of your time. BUT." i said, noticing her glare. "don't overthink it. if you overthink it all you'll end up a hot flustered mess and make a fool of yourself. you have to be comfortable, wear whatever the fuck YOU want to wear. don't go changing yourself for SOME GUY."
"he isnt SOME guy, Liv." she interjected, but there was no anger in her voice, just thoughtfulness.
"you know what i mean Mad's. wear what you want to wear, wear what you are confident in, guys find confidence sexy, take it from me." i finished, and resumed my coffee, inspecting my newly done nails as i did. sultry red with some crystals arranged in a delicate pattern. real crystals mind you. $2500 right there on my nails. never mind my $8500 bag and $5075 bracelet.
i looked up and could see Maddie deep in thought. with a jolt she sat up straight as a pole and looked me in the face. i raised my eyebrows in question and took another sip of coffee.
"i'm going with the dress" she declared. for me. plus then we can co-ordinate. you can wear your black one."
inwardly i rolled my eyes, all of this over a boy. don't get me wrong, i've dated. god's in the past 3 months alone i've had 5 separate boyfriends. to me, they're just another accessory. cute for a while, something to do, go on a few dates, have them buy me a few gifts, have a little "fun", but its always the same, THEY'RE always the same, and i always get bored. so i have my fun, then i move on. but i know Maddie is different, she's caring. so i give a little shrug and just say "sure".
Maddie gives a squeal of delight, " so who's house do you wanna get ready at? the party starts at 10, so i was thinking we should get there about half 11?"
"half 11? Maddie no, half 12. and ill have to meet you outside mine, i'm grounded remember? ill get ready and sneak out, do you think you and your brother could pick me up round the corner from my house?"
"oh ok. yea sounds great. ill text you then. i have to get going, mum's making dinner."
we both stood up, gave each other a hug, promised to see each other later, and both went on our way home.
***
i got home just after 6:15. as i walked into the kitchen i could see my mothers head in one of the cupboards, and a variety of utensils over the counter, along with a number of various unappealing ingredients. next to all of the clutter was my mothers tablet, currently playing some form of cooking tutorial. i rolled my eyes, my mother can't cook. i don't understand why she cant just accept the fact and hire a regular cook like we used to have, it isn't like money is an issue. Brenda, our cook, used to be in every day, now she's only here 4 days a week, due to my mothers insane desire to cook, which she can NOT do.
i jump up on the counter directly behind my mother, but with all the noise of her in the cupboard and the tablet, she has yet to notice my presence. i clear my throat; nothing. i roll my eyes again, grab a pan off of the near-by stove and slam it down on the counter.
"OH, FUUUUU-MPH" comes my mother's attempt of not swearing as she jumps and hits her head on the top of the cupboard. massaging her head she stands up and and pauses the video on the tablet, then turns around to glare at me.
"what?" i ask innocently while admiring my nails.
" for heavens sake Liz. what was the point of that!"
i shrug my shoulders. "just saying i'm home, seeing as you have the need to know where i am every minute of every day." i place my hands delicately on my lap and look at my mother. her hair blonde, her eyes a dark hazel. her clothes large, baggy and un-branded.
"Liz, i don't think it's unreasonable for me to know where you are, i mean i am you're mother. and you are only 17! i just want to keep you safe."
the anger from my others voice was gone, and in its place was a desperate plea for me to understand and forgive her. i glared at her, she had no right to expect that off me, not after what she did.
"Elizibeth.."
the longing in her voice was enough to tip me over the edge.
"NO. you don't get to plead with me, i may be 17, i may be you daughter, but that dosnt excuse my right to privacy, which you violated. you think by cooking some mess im just going to forgive you? what you did was un-excusable! and my name, is Liv."
"Elizibeth, look i know i was wrong, but i had reason, if you would just try to see it from my point of view-"
"my name is Liv! and there is no reason that would make what you did acceptable. i'm going to take a bath, and have an early night. i don't want food. and i definitely dont want to see you. im locking my door, dont try and talk to me."
and with that i jumped off the counter and walked up and into my bedroom. my bedroom which was the size of most peoples living and dining room's combined. i had a queen bed, a large vanity desk and chair, made of solid wood and delicately carved. i had a windowsill with a built in sofa, and a wardrobe that took up the length of one side of my room.
i threw my $8500 bag on the floor and stormed off into my en-suite to start running the bath.
after all, i had a party to go to.
