Chapter 1
“WHAT IS THIS?” I screamed to no one, because I was the only person crazy enough to be outside in this snowstorm.
The driving snow gusts whipped me in the face, and I regretted that I was too vain to wear one of those face sweaters that make you look like a hoodlum.
I slid my backpack off and threw it on top of the snow, ready to do battle. I wiggled the post of the For Sale sign on our lawn back and forth and attempted to unleash it from the ice that had formed around the base. I couldn’t believe someone would play a joke like this—especially around Christmas.
I scanned the neighborhood for possible offenders before spotting Mr. Aikens through the sheets of white, shoveling his car out of his driveway next door. He looked innocent enough. Even if he didn’t donate to my Save the Trees Campaign.
I waved. He waved back and shouted, “Hey, Allie. I spotted you down the block. Was that an Uber car you got out of?”
I gritted my teeth and looked back over my shoulder at my drop off point. I concocted a little fib because I couldn’t tell Mr. Aikens the truth, or he’d blab it to my father for sure. They played bocce ball every Wednesday.
I swear those older men gossip more than my girlfriends.
“No, of course not. Ex-Boyfriend—boyfriend’s car…”
I still hadn’t gotten used to the ex part, although I should have it tattooed on my forehead by now.
"Go out with me, and I promise you’ll leave me for someone better.”
My ex, Shane, had officially left me two years ago, one day after my mother lost her long battle with cancer. I still hadn’t the heart to tell my dad that Shane had left me when I needed him most. I kept saying he was busy. It was hard enough for me to deal with the fact he had bailed on me at the worst time of my life. At twenty-seven, I wasn’t old enough to be jaded, but honestly, I was scarred.
I continued my struggle with the unwanted sign and wondered again who had the nerve to put up a For Sale sign in our yard? I had heard prices had been going up on the Jersey Shore, so maybe some overly zealous realtor made a mistake?
I called out through the whistling snow flurries. “Mr. Aikens, by any chance do you know who put this sign up?”
Mr. Aikens looked over with a tilt of his head to study the oddity. “Nope.”
Humph. Now I was officially annoyed. I finally got on both sides of the darn sign and tugged straight up with all my force. It gave loose suddenly, of course, with my last thrust and sent me flying across the yard a good three feet. I landed with a thud on my back and the stupid sign on top of me. I wrestled it off and dusted off the snow.
“Need help?′ Mr. Aikens offered now.
“No, no, I got it, thanks.”
I stood up and gathered my sense of humor, and my backpack. If I had seen anyone else do this, I would have laughed my butt off. Since it was me, I wasn’t as amused.
“Well, Merry Christmas to you, Allie.” Mr. Aikens smiled. “You tell your father hello for me.”
“I will. Merry Christmas to you and Mrs. Aikens.”
I waved goodbye as I started the trudge up our tundra-like driveway with the hated sign tucked under my arm. When I found out who did this, they were going to hear it from me.
I tossed the offensive sign in the garage and shut the door. It was time to lie to my father. He’d ask me where Shane was, and I’d say I took the bus because Shane was busy– again.
The honest to goodness truth is, I did take Uber. I’m broke as heck, but I couldn’t deal with the train-bus-train combo I’d have to endure. Christmas was always tough emotionally since mom passed, and I didn’t need to freak out over a little Uber.
It’s all Shane’s fault, anyway, as far as I’m concerned. He’s the one who talked me into college in the city–how romantic—driving together and forever after. All of those were lies! He left me for an Icelandic blonde intern at the dean’s office! He said she was polished and perfect and he had fallen in love by mistake.
By mistake?
To add insult to injury, he had also stopped driving me to college at the request of Ms. Sweden. This is why I had to deal with the dreaded bus-train combo and ultimately be lying to my father and my neighbor right now.
This is why I hate men.
You give them everything, and then they disappear like a leech full of blood that falls off when it’s done using you.
That is why if this were a real love story, my true love would be Uber. Uber has never let me down. Uber is always there for me. Uber does not prefer Icelandic blondes. I’m no Einstein, but I know that falling in love with an inanimate object is far safer than falling in love with a man.
