Chapter 1
He was rough with her, grabbing her hair and forcing her head into the mattress. Every time she managed to get her face away from the bed to breathe, a new tear stain painted the pillowcase. He gripped her sides and pinned down her wrists. He shoved her down into the mattress while she whimpered in a way that I couldn’t replicate if I tried. It sounded more scared than hurt. I think I just thought that’s how sex was supposed to look, with all the prostitutes who were dragged by leash and beat on the sidewalks.
Once he’d finished, she sat up a bit, and used her legs and arms as a shield for her bare skin, as if I hadn’t just watched the entire gruesome scene.
She caught her breath, wrapped up in herself, and stood up from the sheets.
He pushed her back onto the bed and wrapped his fingers around her throat.
Then he looked over at me and said that it was my turn.
I still think about the way I raped Esperanza that night, and the way I watched my best friend do the same. Things were different.
Esperanza had been put up for adoption in America after her corner of Panama was threatened by rising sea levels. Unfortunately, her family hadn’t been the only ones who’d thought up such an idea. Esperanza was accompanied by thousands of other kids searching for refuge in America. Group homes were quickly littered with these homeless children. With so many kids to account for and the racist, hateful undertones towards the Spanish in America, Esperanza was easily bought by a group of college boys and repeatedly raped and dehumanized.
