Quick Review (for now)

"So...this one might be the one I might like out of all four stories thrown at me. Unlike Fanfiction, this might not be your cup of tea. So listen carefully for what I have in store for you. I am not going to sugarcoat my review because there isn't a reason to. Ok...I have to say you have shown Squidward and Spongebob's personalities wonderfully. The song Spongebob just sang reminded me of FUN. The Spongebob version. F is for Fun ...U is for u and me. N is for Nywhere....you get the idea. And that reminded me about what Plankton sang too. F is for fire tearing down buildings, U is for Uranium...BOMBs, N is for Never....whatever. I think you get the idea. Cute song you made up. The characters were described wonderfully and SpongeBob's actions would be exactly what we would anticipate him do. Ok...it was hard to follow with your sudden time change. I thought it could have improved. It was a rather...rough transition. You missed the secret to the Krabby Patty formula! That is LOVE...so if you are going to write SpongeBob fanfic, you need to make it so similar that we think it's another SpongeBob movie. That's the only thing you are missing in the first chapter. I thought it could use love. If love is part of the plot...then fine. Squidward is supposed to go kabonkers for the krabby patty. Remember his krabby patty fest? Honestly, because it's fanfiction, I think the story could use exaggeration. New dialogue, new paragraph, simple. Check out chapter 2 to see your transition to the Krab's memory about hogus, whatever his name was. Characters introductions like Patrick is rather abrupt. Make character entrances smoother So, other than that, I have no complaints for this story!"