Introductions
I woke up today feeling colder than usual. Maybe it was because our power went out again do to the snow. I slipped out of bed shivering and walked to the bathroom to escape my iceberg of a bedroom. I looked at my pale, pink skin and spoke,
“I wonder if today’s the day.”
I always say that and yet nothing ever happens. It’s as if that is my signal to wake up and remind myself I’m alive. Even though I’ve never wanted to be.
I slowly went down the stairs trying my best to not make noise. My mother was passed out on the couch, most likely drunk from her fight with my dad the night before. My dad was quietly brushing his teeth, getting ready to leave for work early. I don’t blame him either, mom can get a bit intense in an emotional kind of way the day after a big fight like that one. I know they don’t love each other anymore but they have to torture me with endless fighting night after night.
I went to the kitchen admiring the greenish wallpaper decorating the halls of the house.
“Be back later tot”
My dad has called me tot ever since i can remember.
“Bye, dad.”
He closes the door gently so it doesn’t wake my mom. I was planning on making my mother breakfast but i dont want to risk her crying on my shoulder. Don’t get me wrong i love her, but it gets hard having to be the adult sometimes. Like this one time, they were fighting in my room. They were both drunk and fighting over me and my sister. Those kind of fights always end up with my mom, my sister, and I at my grandma’s house while my dad goes somewhere. I don’t know where he goes but i do know i shouldn’t ask.
I decided to just leave and go on a walk. It was cold and misty out, the best kind of day in my opinion. I bring my journal with me in order to keep track of my thoughts. We live in Seattle. Ive never been much of a city girl but it’s not all bad. The weirdos are usually nice to me and the others I’m just happy leave me alone. Although, one time a man they called pot belly jelly stole money from me once. I wasn’t mad or anything when it happened though. We all have to eat, or smoke for some people but its cool. I get it.
