Chapter 1
“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”
-Anais Nin
I shouldn’t be here, why did I decide to come here in the first place. My friend Kyana taps my shoulder, taking me out of my thoughts. “Isn’t it sweet, the proposal, omg it was so beautiful. They make a perfect couple. I am sure they are going to be an amazing couple. I can’t wait for the wedding.”
“It is nice”, I lied. The truth is if I was aware that my friend’s boyfriend is going to propose to her on her 30th birthday party, I would have missed it. I look at the happy couple and thinking how long before they realize its all a big fat lie. Yes, shocker, I don’t believe in Love and there is definitely nothing like unconditional love. Its all business, a contract between two people, trying to fulfill their needs. There is always one receiver and one giver. One with the biggest need and one with the little need. The one who loves the most and the one who takes advantage of the one who gives. Some people call this charade as LOVE. Its nothing but old-style barter system one has something, others have something, and they trade and give it a fancy name Love. People are too blind to see this. And don’t get me started on romance, poets are to be blamed and of course silly romcoms. Well, even religion uses it, the perfect weapon to manipulate people. I can go on and on, I wish people could see things clearly.
“Mia, Mia, pennies for your thoughts”, Kyana’s yelling made me come back to the torture. Here I am at my childhood friend’s birthday/proposal party, all alone looking around and thinking about what is wrong with people. “It’s getting late, I should leave,” I said. One more minute here and I will lose my sanity. Kyana with an angry look and almost yelling “Are you crazy, its Friday night”. “I have a deadline and I am behind” I lied again. I used to think I wasn’t a good liar, but it looks like this party is so torturous that it is bringing out one more skill in me.
I left the party and decided to call it a night. I wasn’t always like this; I was in love with the concept of love and yes movies are to be blamed here. And I was looking for love too desperately but only found out it doesn’t exist. Love is nothing but a fear relationship based on control. No respect, no love, don’t believe me look at the couple promising to love each other in happiness and sickness, give it a few months, years and it’s all gone. Some only survive this and that too because one of them decided to make compromises and in some cases both. There is no love, just manipulation, possession, and addiction.
