Drag Queen Undercover (BoyxBoy)

The sound of heels against the floor and the smell of expired foundation is starting to grow on me, like that zit that grows at the very back of your ass. This is drag. It’s wild and it’s fun. The rush you feel when you’re on that stage is absolutely the best feeling a human being can possibly feel. It’s better than orgasm.

Haha, joke I’m kidding. Orgasm all the way!

Now I’m not about to give you a ten thousand word essay about what drag is or what culture we have because I, myself, am new to this. I just started doing drag literally weeks ago when my drag mom, Sushi Tamora Dee, offered me a job. I’ve been playing with make up ever since I was a kid in my mom’s bathroom but I never really came out of that room with those stuff on my face. I just kept it in myself. But something in me sparked when I saw Sushi perform and I realized that it’s more than just lip syncing or having stand up comedy, it’s a home to those people like me, it’s family. We entertain people and we just have a good time. We don’t fucking care about what other people think because we’re fearless.

Well, at least them. Not me though, I’m in the closet.

Okay, haha, laugh at me all you want but I grew up in a tough home and there are just things that I can’t do yet. It’s all in the matter of time.

“Oooh the closeted gay boy is serving fish tonight!” Dominika , or Max when he’s a boy, bantered at the back of my mirror as Sushi blends in the final touches of my make up.

“It’s always the trades that are the fishiest.” Sushi chuckled, putting on the highlight on my nose as the final touch. I smiled at Sushi and then at the mirror when I saw what she did with my make up. “You gotta learn how to paint yourself soon, child. I’m not here forever.” She said, standing behind me as she fixes my wig.

I don’t know what I did good in my past life but God did a hell of a job blessing me with someone like Sushi in my life. Sushi found me in my darkest days of my life. I just graduated high school back then when my parents found out about my sexuality, and surprise surprise, my parents were totally religious and as expected, turned their backs at me when I decided to quote and quote, choose the devil’s path.

It’s so corny sometimes how religious people coin terms like that, it’s just mind blowing to me.

But luckily, I got accepted for a scholarship in a university and I figured if I don’t push through this, I am never gonna get anywhere. I walked away from home, penniless and homeless, only with my clothes and my acceptance letter to the university. I stumbled upon this club nearby my university and that is when I found Sushi Tamora Dee, or Geordy.

Geordy found something in me, he said I have potential and I gladly took his advice to get in drag. Fast forward to now, here I am, serving you mistress villainess ready to steal yo man.

“Thank you so much, Tamora.” I gave her a cheeky smile and stood from the chair. I am not bragging, well maybe I am, but damn that’s a woman right there! I guess maybe you could say I’m a look queen since I am very slender and my legs are literally my asset. My god awful parents must have some good genes that I am also blessed with a pretty face so if I put on makeup, I ultimately resemble a woman.

“Five minutes and you’re up. Chop chop!” Tamora said as she shoved me backstage. “Get them coins henny!” She hollered and went back to the club.

Now this, ladies and gentlemen, is what I’m definitely good at. Besides that fact that I am smart, I am also a massive lip sync performer and I put all of these bitches back to their set.

“Now heads up gays and women!” Sapphire, Samson when he’s a boy, entered the stage with her fabulous ostrich feather, her skin literally sparkling as the lights hit her. She’s also one of the look queens in the House of Dee and I look up to her as well, as the youngest member of the house. “The one that you came here for, Ms. Paris Valentine!” She introduced me and the crowd roared in anticipation.

The lights went off and I walked to the center stage, making sure that my bra was tight enough. I always keep in mind that I was made for this and this is what I live for.

“Underneath the city lights. There is a world few know about. Where the rules don’t apply, no. And you can’t keep a good girl down.”

The beat blasted through the speakers and the light shined on me as I heard the people live for me. I performed my ass through the whole thing, getting tips from here and there. Christina Aguilera had always been my go-to lip sync performance because I just live for her! No one does it like her and nobody will ever top her god damn voice.

When my performance was over, everybody in the club hollered, screaming my name.

’Paris! Paris! Paris!’

I smiled as I walked back to the back of the stage, basking the people’s cheer. I hope I make my drag mom proud. She’s one of the reasons why I’m known here.

“Nice performance Paris!” Dominika appeared from the dressing room and hugged me. “A, fucking, gain. You did it again.”

~

“You sure you wanna stay like that?” Sushi, now Geordy since he’s out of drag, asked me. “I’m worried you might get in trouble. You know, there are a lot of homophobes here in California darling.”

I nodded to her, clutching onto my backpack full of textbooks and college stuff. “I’ll just de-drag at my apartment. I’m running out of time. I have to submit some essays to my professor via email.”

“Okay sweetie, call me when you need anything. Max, and Samson will sleep at my house. You sure you don’t wanna join us? I have food.”

I smiled at Geordy, putting on my leather trench coat and a scarf. “I might oversleep and your house is miles away from my university, I can’t be late.” I kissed Geordy on the cheek and hugged Max and Samson as I hurriedly walked out of the club to grab a cab.

I decided to grab a coffee at starbucks first, since I can’t live without iced coffee. It’s the only literal thing that has been running through my bloodstream and I don’t know if I can ever go back with just water.

Just as expected though, when I arrived at Starbucks, it was occupied with college students themselves. I have to remind myself that I am still in my drag, wearing six-inch heels and a blonde wig with a trench coat on and a jansport bag. I look like a slut version of Inspector Gadget, except I’m very beautiful and he’s very… old.

I ordered my coffee and sat on a two-seater table as I hurriedly opened my laptop with anxiety.

I hope I am not too late.

I grabbed my textbook and placed them on the table just in case I needed it for reference. The essay was about this political literature of Plato’s Republic. I don’t know anything about it yet, which is why I am anxious. But I know I’ll get through this because I am what? A super woman.

As I was typing in my essay, out of nowhere this man came out of nowhere. “I love this book.” He muttered.

When I saw him, I had to take a double look and stopped myself from gasping. The man looked like he came out of a magazine with his chiseled face, nicely shaven beard, and hazel hair.

Damn, I am a white man’s whore.

I gave him a seductive smile. “Oh, it’s one of my favorites.” I said, knowing very well that I have never even laid my hands, even a glimpse, on that book.

Okay now get naked.

Just kidding that’s very inappropriate god damn Liam, can you not drool for once.

But he has a beard!

I shook my thoughts away and focused on the hot guy in front of me. He looked mature, probably in his late twenty’s or what not.

“Do you mind if I join?”

I bit my lip and nodded. “Of course.” I pretended to look busy with my laptop, when in fact I think I’m typing nonsense on my essay. I even typed ’whore’ at some point and I don’t know where I am with my cluttered train of thoughts.

“Tell me, what’s a pretty woman like you doing with a book like that?”

My eyes popped out.

Oh shit I’m still on drag!

My mind started to race. Does he know that I’m a man in a wig or I’m just really that beautiful to not get clocked? Fuck.

Okay breathe. I coughed and elevated my voice a little higher. I hope he won’t notice. Luckily, my voice is pretty high-pitched and sometimes people from McDonalds delivery mistake me for a woman with just my voice. “Some women prefer a company of books instead of other things your head might be thinking.”

“Oh that did not sound right I’m sorry.” He coughed. “What I just mean to say is th-”

“That women who are stereotypically pretty like me don’t find enjoyment in reading political literature such as this?”

He blushed and sunk back to his seat. I don’t know, there was something about my confidence when I am out as Paris Valentine. There are things that Paris can do that Liam can’t. This, for example, I can never talk back to a hot guy for I get too conscious about myself and become insecure. I get intimidated and shy away easily from social confrontations. Compared when I’m coming out as Paris Valentine, I have this sort of mask that protects me and this newly found confidence that only she can give.

Funny how just a tiny bit of makeup and a good wig can change a person’s facade a lot.

He looked dumbfounded for a second, making me feel bad. “I’m just playing with you.” I laughed. “You should have seen the look in your face.”

He breathed and smiled. “Thank goodness. I did not want to come off as rude. I was just so impressed because not all people find things like that interesting.”

I don’t either. I just think you’re hot so I’m playing around.

“And I have never met someone so feisty such as you.”

“Is that a compliment?” I asked.

“Yeah. I know we came off on the wrong foot so I’m starting again. I’m Dr. Gray, but just call me Oliver.” He offered his hand and I gladly shook it.

“I’m Li-... Paris.” Crap! I almost introduced my real self for a second.

“Paris, really pretty name, like you.” He smiled. His smile is so charming and he looked like a mix between Chris Pine and Henry Cavill.

Holy crap is this real? A real hot guy hitting on me, not me, Paris!? I should probably pull out as early as possible or this could get worse.

I gulped. “Are you flirting?”

“I’m sorry, if you don’t mind, of course. Actually, I was about to go home when I saw you and your book. I guess you can say I’m impulsive.”

I chuckled. “No it’s totally fine!”

“Look I’m shooting my shot here and I really need to go because my Uber Taxi is here but would it be okay if I can get your number and ask you out sometime?”

I acted as if I’m calm but in reality, my heart was pounding like hell. I have never had a straight man ask me out ever! I breathed and composed myself. God damn he’s so hot. Maybe I could play along?

Oh no…. As my drag mother would say, this smells like trouble.

“Sure. Here.” I smiled at him and wrote my number on a piece of paper. He gave me a wink and headed out of the shop.

Just like that.

Did that just happen? Holy shit! Did some straight hot dude ask me out as Paris?

And I said yes?!

But he was so irresistible and he’s also very intriguing. Oh no Liam, what have you gotten yourself into?

I sighed, forcing myself to write this stupid ass essay so I can start removing this make up and wig and go home…

My tuck is starting to hurt from that encounter. Crap.