Do you like Ravioli? Yes I do!
Tell me something, reader. Why did you pick this story out of all in the world? I mean, be honest, did someone force you to read it for a book report? Or maybe you wanted to? Let's face it, who wants to read books anymore, only the nerdy kids or the ones who want to brag about the A+ they got in English. Books were the video games of my time, OMG! NO cell service! What am I to do with my life! I might as well just go live under a rock. Let's be real, that's how you would react. Anyways, books were cherished, shared tales, and memories of childhood. Bet none of you heard of Captain Underpants© by my good friend Dav Pilkey, (I kinda lied, I don't know him, in fact to him I could be some crazy old guy living next door, or a random one of Justin Bieber's fan-girls trying to get famous so he notices me) but, that doesn't matter, the point is..KIDS DON'T READ ANYMORE. PROBABLY NEVER WILL.
Did you ever wonder if the characters exist, or do the authors want you to believe that they do? (No, this is not that one story where the kid sees something that others can't so they conclude the kid is mad. I didn't copy Peter Pan, okay?) Yada, yada. We all know there are those goody-two-shoes non-fiction books. " I'm always real, no matter what happens. I will live on forever so, bow down fiction peasants. You'll die out anyways." say the non-fiction books as if they are royalty. Curse those scumbags! Ahem, just forget what I just said. I have a little...problem with non-fiction books.
What happens to "unwanted" books. We all know you are guilty of it, so don't even bother denying it. I think you did this, no, in fact, I KNOW YOU DID THIS BEFORE. You buy a book, like "Wow, this seems so interesting! (Yeah, right otherwise you would have read it.) You buy the book and the book calls for you to read it, hoping that you won't forget it. Instead, you just put it on your bookshelf and go play video games. One month you haven't read it, the second month, you still didn't even read a page yet, after one year the book is just sitting there collecting dust. Now, this cycle continues on and on until you ultimately forget about the entire book's existence. So, what was the point of buying the book? For style? For what you humans call "room decor". Forgive me if I haven't introduced myself, I just thought that no one would be up to this point yet. I am Ravioli Picario Stiltsenburger IV, Rav for short (Yes, burger and ravioli, you nincompoop, laugh all you want), I am the narrator of this story like there is any story. Those "unwanted" books head to the Void. A dark and cruel place with no life, the characters are never seen again, the book has vanished out of existence with absolutely no trace, and young readers like you, will never even know the book was there in the first place. The Void is empty and cold, shows no mercy to anyone, not even to innocent Little Bo Peep.
Even books that are read could be sent to the Void thanks to, THE RATERS. They destroy an entire book's reputation. This is a completely evil organization made up of people who want to make books' lives miserable. They act like they're all high and mighty, reading every book. If it is a book they don't like then, they don't even look at it twice. They just dump it and down in the Void the book goes. Authors after a while lose their confidence in writing and then they just stop writing. The population of authors has decreased over the years by at least 10% and it all from the work of the raters. Raters destroy books and they only favorite those ugly stupid non-fiction books, why? Cause they are always interesting, just because it is about something real. Raters have no imagination. Heck! I would be surprised if they had a normal childhood. Books did absolutely, positively nothing to those raters but no. They always lash out on all the fiction books. While the non-fiction books always have to update like your grandma's old computer she bought in 1976. I mean come on half of them are old and bland. Raters are bookists! Bookists towards fiction books They only favorite non-fiction books.
Raters have sidekicks too! They use the PRESS to send propaganda to the readers and brainwash you to only like non-fiction books. Ever wonder why so many pre-teens like magazines. The PRESS makes sure that it states everything that makes you the cool-cat of the class. (I don't know who says cool cat anymore, do you?) By wearing Barbie's pink dress your a fashionista, by wearing a cake full of makeup on your face you are gorgeous and super trendy. (Definitely, jaw-dropping too, not in a good way.) They control you, those reporters, they are pesky mosquitoes of society. It's always the truth, uh-huh. Tell that to my Mom, she will be the judge of your so-called "truth". Raters work against all of the book nations and they have for years. Hating on books they think are useless and menacing to society. I just wanna get up straight in their face and scream, "YOUR OPINION DOES NOT MATTER!" The readers do, not like those raters will ever read them again. The readers are the ones who comment on books. I don't know about you but, I want something interesting.
Like that wizard kid with the weird shaped scar on his head with a wand that goes bipity-bopity-boo, you know who I'm talking about right? He is in Gyro-ffin-claw? Griffinfly? GRYPHONDOOR! Oh its spelt Gryffindor? That's it! If he were to disappear just like Houdini, readers would protest to bring it back, readers have the power to fight for books and characters, to create a world of peace for books. Those kinds of readers don't exist anymore, ever since video games infested their minds to a contagious disease making them mindless zombies to the cause! Those types of readers became extinct long ago...
WOW! I am surprised that you actually stayed! You really wanted to read this book! So, in exchange, I will tell you a story, a story about a young author taking on the book world. Changing life there for eons. Giving us the pleasure to read fiction books to our heart's content. Breaking those from the trance of electronics and bringing us back the lost tribe of the justifying readers. Her name is Lilac.
