Chapter 1
I...I have made allot of choices that affected me dearly, and emotionally, it affected how the person who I thought will forever be with me and protect me acted towards me. I thought that...that they'll still be with me and never leave me...I..but the things I did...I guess this was all my fault...I guess he left me because of me, all me, all me and the things I did. The choices I made....
I chose to let people get to me...I chose to let them take advantage of me...I chose to want to make as much friends as I could possibly get...I chose to pick the wrong people because i thought that ... that the way they acted was all an act or...or something....
But it wasn't all my fault...he was barely there...he was busy I guess...he didn't talk to me much about things and my day...I guess he wasn't that type of person.... but even though...he still protected me and told them all who hurt me to leave me alone.
The thought that he thought I disobeyed him and talked to someone he just told to leave me alone hurt...I didn't...but he saw that I did...I don't know...
But he's gone now....left me...no way to message him or anything...tears stained into my pillow but scars stained into my heart...what hurts worse? Knowing I don't think I'll let someone be that untangled into me, my feelings, my heart... knowing I won't ever see him again... knowing that I am probably damaged for life....or that knowing I'm so lonely with no one here to treat me as he treated me...
