| Her
" People hurt each other.
It happens to everyone.
Intentionally.
Unintentionally.
Regretfully or not.
It's part of what we do, as people.
The beauty is that we have the ability
To heal and forgive "
- Adi Alsaid
January 20
Lizzy clenched her hands covering her ears forcing herself to avoid the loud bangs from outside of her apartment. The world had started to crumble for the past two days now. She was afraid each day passing by.
'I can't believe this is happening!'
She said to herself.
'Can life get any better? No, of course it can't the world is already crashing down to pieces'
She slowly rose from the floor surrounded by pieces of rocks after an earthquake happened not long ago.
She sighed and sat on her couch.
'What the hell am going to do now?'
Even if she did went out of her apartment she'll still end up being killed.
There's no escape.
She thought to herself.
To think that my world would 'literally' crumbled is kind of funny. And I thought my world already ended when I last saw Peirce.
Peirce...
She repeated the name of her ex-husband in her head, sighing loudly.
Should I?
No! The world is literally crumbling into pieces would you really think he would pick up!
She argued with herself. She sighed again.
'It doesn't hurt to try'
She said to herself picking up her cellphone.
Hesitating to dial him.
Just do it!
A memory of a meme popped up in her head making her laugh, nervously. With shaking hands she press the call button.
Hearing the ringing of her phone, made her nervous. Please be safe...
She said to herself. Even though she had tried to hate him for a year now, it didn't work. Her mind would randomly think about him asking questions if he was okay or was he happy now that she's gone.
Tears started to blur her vision as memories started to rush back to her.
The memories when they were happy.
Hearing the last ring of her phone followed by a voice mail. Her tears left her eyes.
Why am I so stupid to think he would pick up?
She sighed ready to tell the words that she had kept from her heart.
"Hey it's me Lizzy, I know you probably think that I'm stupid to send you this voice mail when our lives are literally in the hands of death...". She paused blinking her tears a way.
"But I just want to say that I forgive you, so please stop blaming yourself I don't want you to regret what you've done to me, I don't want you to drown yourself in pain," She said, muffling her sobs.
"I know you probably thought I hated you, I thought I would hate you too but I just can't, no matter how many times I've tried, my mind and heart screams that I still care about you, still....love you,". She admitted.
Flashbacks from the day she left him started to rush back.
"I'm sick and tired of you, I tried to accept who you are but you're just god damn too much! I've had enough of shit I'm leaving!"
She heard her own voice yell through her trip to memory lane.
"Fine then just fucking leave me break your fucking promise forget everything I'm sick and tired handling this stupid shit with you, I don't wanna have a bitch as my wife so fucking get of my house!"
She heard the voice her ex-husband yelled making her tears fall even more.
"I hate you so damn much! I regret everything I did with you! I'm sick of you I don't wanna ever fucking see your damn messed up face ever again and I would gladly leave your broke ass,"
Her words repeated from remembering what she had said to her husband.
"I regret leaving you that day...I'm sorry for all the words I said to you I was out of control I just couldn't...take it anymore seeing you miserable, seeing you drunk everytime you get home, and seeing you with another woman when you promised to only love me,"
She continued.
"I loved you too much I was too attached with you but the worst thing is that I still am even though I had spent a whole year without you my feelings for you still stayed," She paused wiping her tears away.
"I should probably stop it's not like you ever did listen to this stupid voice mail but if ever you did listen to this I'm telling you to please forgive yourself like I am forgiving you even though it's a bit too late and please just know that I love you,"
That was the last words she said after sending her voicemail to her ex-husband.
She was not afraid of dying, she felt relieved getting all of the pain she had held in her heart.
She checked her phone. He still hasn't called.
She checked their messages, her eyes widen seeing a text message from her ex-husband. It was just sent a few nights ago when the world started to crumble in to pieces.
She read and listened to the message and voicemail of her ex-husband after listening to each word he had said made her eyes started to shed tears again.
Idiot how can he say such stupid things?
.
End
