TORN

Can you forget?

A dull ache

This night to burry in one breath

Look at me reflected in the mirror

With dark makeup

By ( lee sA)

Amara

I dont know myself anymore, if u come to see the girl from the past and now u will say we are two different people i wasnt like this at all i was full of dreams, hope, i believed in love , finding my prince charming we fall inlove and we get married and have our happy ever after if u come to see me now you will say am not that girl at all

PAST

My father was a police man , he was a respective man he alywas do good i don't know what went wrong sudden he started drinking, when he comes home he always argue with mom , Sometimes he may beat her infront of us. But no matter what i still loved my father no one could tell me anything or any lie about my father. In my family we were born five three girls and two boys , there is my brother Zane,my sister Ellie, me "Amara", then vernon that's is my brother and our youngest sister blossom.

Ellie loved mother much than father so we alywas fight when our parents argue, zane dont stay home very much he is alywas with father but vernon and blossom they are still young to understand anything. That night i could never forget father come home , he looked very scared and his shirt and hand was covered by blood when he saw me he stopped and looked at me he said nothing and then went to the room i slowly walked to my parent's door and start to listen sudden come ellie calling me i turn to look at her very first and show her a sigh to keep quiet she understood and she come closer to listen what i am listening what we heard there shocked us , father killed someone and now they are looking for him both the police and those bad man. , i didn't want to believe so i ran outside i wasn't looking i suddenly bumbed to someone and we both fall i was about to yell at that person to look at him it was a boy , a very scared boy he was staring at me while he was trembling. I wished that day i could have avoid it i could have turn and stop time to never arrived at that time, that's when my life changed that's where everything brow out for me. That boy he was being chased by his nanny i think, and i helped him to hide him , he told me he run away from home he wanted to find his mom because am a joyful girl , I would also run away, i played with him i made sure he was happy, but i couldn't hide him very well he was found and been taken , i couldn't care who he was but he looks like a rich boy by seeing many people looking for him . I tried to stop them but at Ivery last I failed. I felt so bad for him who was that kid.

I return home sudden I saw mother holding vernon and carrying blossom and the bags were also there ,

Father was now shouting at mother " u are not taking my children! Avery if u want to leave, leave but my children they stay do u hear me! " father was now yelling not shouting anymore at mother but mother said nothing .

"open this door women !" Mother had locked father inside the house, but mother didn't even flinch a taxi come and mother put my siblings inside when she wanted to enter she saw me and stopped, but at that time father was able to unlock the door and now was going towards mother ,mother looked at me for the last time and tell me she will come for me while tears dropping in her eyes and left .

When i saw the car leaving my head started working again i started chasing the taxi while crying but then father come and caught me I tried to push him , telling him to Chase after them but father didn't nothing I was shocked so hard that i lost conscious.

When i woke up i could see Ellie next to me crying why was he crying , suddenly the memories coming flooding in my head where i remembered mother has left us she doesn't love us but she said she will come for me so Ellie pulled close to me and we hugged each other while crying, father come and shouting at us to keep quiet that our beloved mother abandon us she will never come back she doesn't love us. That night we had to leave we couldn't stay there anymore or father would be caught by the police.

Father took us at this huge house it was a very big house sarounded by many men, wearing black suite, me and Ellie couldn't stop talking and smiling i alywas wanted to write stories, traveling countries see the worlds and meet different people. Father said we will have everything we want there, anything we want we will be given to us.

if only we could have known better what had father done we could have avoid the storm.

When i just enter into the house i saw that nanny at first i didn't remember her until i saw that boy running to me he pushed me and i fall down and he went into hide sudden showed up a man looked very angry he got close to me and asked me if i have seen a boy, of course I have seen him and also i know where he was hiding but this man infront of me also scared me so i lied and save the boy again if only i could have known i was making a mistake but i didn't that man storm off the room calling for tht boy i think his name is Jinx and there stood the boy smiling at me.

" its you " that what he said . When father left me and Ellie there he said he was going to come back after few days, he told us he was going to search for our siblings and mother so we just have to stay there without making any mistakes, but he never come and we wished if he could have come and take us away from this hell. Times past I was now a new toy for Jinx, he saw me as his mother , so this made a problem for me.

Any boy who was seen to play with me or even talk to me the next day he would avoid me or leaves school. When i tell my dreams to the class i could see jinx mad, his face was just like his father when he gets angry,I thought it was his always expression since he is always like that . Days past and everyday i was lossing friends no one talked to me or wanted to play with me, they left me alone, at first I didn't know that but later I come to know out it was all jinxs fault,. Because they were scared of jinx no one come close to me couldn't take it anymore i went and face him i found him with his friends i didn't care at all

" jinx why are u doing this to me? U have been entering in my life since kindergarten why don't u understand i cant alywas be playing with you only, since when have you become like !like! this please leave me alone". When I wanted to leave he stopped me and come close to my ears and told me

" when your with me you only talk about yourself, you show your smile to everyone but not me, you only talk to other people but not me listen Mara i will never! never! Allow you to have any happiness when i don't have, you belong to me only me, your only mine, so i will hope you make yourself comfortable of it" and then he left went back to his friends . I ws furious, mad , i cursed him so many time i arrived at home very angry and throw my bag to the bed i was only caring for myself that i didn't see there is something troubling Ellie when i alywas come back from school i only tell Ellie about jinx when she wants to tell me something i cut her if only i could have stop being selfish i thought the world only involves around me if only i could have listen to her. That night Ellie run away by herself and left me here all alone everyone have abandon me i blame everyone but in reality it was my fault my sister she also was having a hard time, she was suffering there and i didn't know she was being rapped by jinx brother Otis and i didn't know i found out all this when i was going to see Mr Conrad wanting to ask him about father but i heard them talking i cried so much how could the whole family be evil like this, i can't stay here at all i have to I have to run away and find father why wasn't he here? I needed him I knew if I continue staying here I will die . That night i almost runaway but i was caught and then i was told that father had sold us and i belonged to justine (jinx). When jinx heard of what i was going to do he looked very angry he said nothing and pulled me to my room and close the door i was locked at that room for one week without food i was only I allowed to drink water, I was alone, I can now see my Bright star starting to fade away and that made me cry alot.

PRESENT DAY

" what are u day dreaming? Asked my friend Bree she is alywas Happy, alywas makes jokes that's why I liked her, she reminded me of this old me, when I was happy,no care of the world, had so many dreams but now am just an empty cup.

" nothing" i said she got close to me and talk in low voice " do u want to know what i heard?" Looking at me.

" i don't! you know i don't like gossiping infact its my time to go on the stage" i said while getting up

" even if its a good gossiping ( i show her not interested but i know her she will still tell me ) ohh! Come one i heard that jinx will give you evocation but this time no bodyguards around only yourself " when she finished gleaming waiting for my reaction i knew he will give me my free time but this is new with no guards around this is a way for him to say sorry when he does wrong things to me so i acted normal even Bree was shocked i knew she wanted to say something but i was called on the stage

You see when i get punishment jinx brings me here to one of his club to dance infront of hungry mens but no touch, only looking and Also not looking with an hungry eyes if you your seen to touch me you may loss one off parts off your body, many people have been killed by him all because of his stupid jealous, but i have changed so much I don't even Know myself, i don't care now days i sleep around with anyone to provoke jinx , i have no dreams or hopes i wish i could kill myself but i cannot there people whom i care and i have to protect that's why am still alive and with him . While i was dancing i saw jinx so he is here!, there is a man looking at me very hungry with his eyes so i got close to him i dance to him i could feel jinx eyes on me but am not going to look at him and then i pulled that man close and kiss him my time was over and i got off stage i know what i have done is wrong , that, that man is going to lose his life but this girl infront of you doesn't feel any part of guilt. I return to my room finding bree dancing and humming to herself sudden storm in jinx

" leave us" said jinx to Bree, Bree left very fast i didn't look at him i took my seat i hate him with all my heart,

" what was that Mara?" I hate when he calls me tht way he is the one who made me to hate my name but i kept quiet like i didn't hear him.

"I cut his lips that's what you wanted right and i removed his eyes for wanting what is mine ure happy now?" I still kept quite while I was looking at mirror.

" your still angry at me? But you know your the one who do this to me you provoke me to my last limit , oky because i love you so much and i alywas want to see you happy am giving you avocation this time three months what do u think?"

Looking at me ohh so its really i can't run away even if want to , right now my hands are tied, i cant anymore you see i have try so many time to run away but he always finds me alywas and i have seen and experience many hard things even if i want i cant retun to that innocent girl from the past. Am no longer that innocent girl I was a murderer.

" But am choosing the place and county you will go" he said "

"what! no way i ..." then am not going do you think i don't know! Go yourself" i said while still facing the mirror

" oky fine you can go whatever place u want" he said. I was happy but i couldn't show it there sudden i was pulled up and he was holding me so tight making me to look at him.

" if u decide to do any stupid thing i will know i will not hurt you but i think u know whom i will hurt right and i believe u don't want that (then he pulled me close and kissed me) enjoy your freedom babe".

I sat down i hate him so much but at least i have three month to enjoy and forget my worries..!

Ohh! this is for today my hands real hurts i believe i have try to go far so i hope u enjoy the story .