Self Portrait
The lonely man arose To an emptiness deep inside Within his walls it grows This desire he can not hide To his canvas he now goes To paint the last of its kind
A painting that tells a tale of a man whose seen it all Reflections of my past now hang upon my wall
I close my eyes to see and reflect upon the past What shall this painting be My time has come at last to open myself up to me and paint this shadow that I cast
I reflect upon a memory I see a lonely distant mother I see a confused distant child who once hated his own color
To young was I to leave and the truth of it quite sad About a father I did not know and two brothers I never had Through my tears I did grow to hate the man I called Dad
Out on my own at eighteen Still wanting to be apart of the crowd Still wanting the approval of my mother Still wanting to make my father proud
Acceptance finally shows in an unexpected way A relation starts to grow Then my father passed away To my canvas he now goes He’s with me everyday
I married out of love and separated much the same Two people grew apart with each of us to blame
She had been my best friend and at times my worst enemy In my heart I could not send the compassion and sincerity Now she’s gone forever Forever gone, a part of me
Once in a profession that justified violence and misery I’m not sure now if that’s the kind of man I want to be
Fighting in a war I never claimed to understand Handing down orders Soldiers dying under my command Their names never forgotten Their lives lost in the sand
On my canvas they shall be from my brush to my memory I open my eyes to see the portrait painted is me
I don’t like what I’ve become Left only to ask myself how and to take a long hard look at the man I am Now!
