00.Legacy
When the world began, God created man and woman to walk the earth as equal. His Angels were meant to watch over and guide the people to a better life. However, one chose another path, a much darker path. Lucifer saw the darkness hidden in his God’s creations and wanted to twist it to his advantage. Cast out of Heaven to rule over the dominion of known as Hell, he took hold and created the darkness we have come to fear. Soon Demons clawed their way to the surface and left nothing but distraught and death in their wake.
As a last safeguard to humanity, God sent his Angel’s to protect the human race but the war was never on their side. Soon after dark creatures were born, Vampires, Werewolves and Magical entities walked among the humans. The Angels were fought to their very last breath but it was never enough.
When all hope seemed lost, the light was found in the very dark creatures Lucifer created. The order was formed, a witch in the lead fought alongside humans and Angels alike to vanquish the demons from destroying the earth. The war did not stay in the shadows for long…
The Church took hold of the creatures and vowed to kill them all. Fearing for their future, they all went into hiding. The Good no longer fighting, the evil lurking around every corner. The war never-ending, for one day another evil will rise that will call upon those allies.
Great introduction. It is a summarize of what to expect and raises questions. But to give the readers more information about the characters, you can add adverbs? (not sure if correct word) such as the cold-hearted Sebastian or the timid Katharine, the brave Katharine, the charasmatic yet cowardly Sebastian. It add information very subtly and raises questions as the readers want to know what their character development will be and how they grow together.
First paragraph almost has no mistakes. The only thing I would leave out is when the world began and start with God created... It goes straight to the point and catches the readers attention. For the rest be careful with the word -took- you use it a lot and often you can replace this with another verb. For the rest, try not to use dirty words such as after, when, soon and more. They tell and do not show. Overall great chapter and when you edit this out of this chapter and restructure some sentences, it will be amazing. It gives information that might be necesarry in the next chapters.