blackmail-ish sex
Saturday afternoon; my room
‘’Why are you always barging in my room, caressing me however you want hah?’’, I mourned in between both our heavy breaths. ‘’well for one I thought you liked how deep I bury myself in you’’, he smirked I looked away ‘’we have to stop this, I can’t hurt him I can’t !’’, I sobbed feeling dirty that I always enjoyed it. ‘’I have a girlfriend too and I’m ready to leave if you want this’’, he held my hands tightly in his and knelt down as I still kept my gaze on the window away from his. ‘’you don’t understand I love him’’ a tear rolled down my right cheek I removed my hand from his grip forcefully, and stood by the window abruptly. ‘’if you loved him why were we having sex just now, why didn’t you stop me if so hah’’ he spoke in an almost teary upset voice I looked up to him and asked myself the same question, ‘’in spite of all that has happened this ends here and now, while it’s still early’’ , ‘’ so you don’t feel anything not even a single thing the way I hold you the way I make you mourn the look I always manage to get from your face that not even him can get’’. ’’you blackmailed me into submitting to your sex I never uttered a word because I was afraid you would tell him one thing he finds totally attractive about me now , you fucking deceived me for fucks sake and now you want me to leave him for you hah you must be joking right now’’. I exclaimed, ‘’I know I was wrong blackmailing you I just. .I just wanted to have you with every power within me even if it meant hurting’’, ‘’you know that’s where you get it all wrong thinking I’ll fall for you eventually no you don’t hurt the people you love’’, ‘’then I guess me and you that different are we?’’. ‘’don’t ever for a second think that I’m not a relationship wrecker don’t you ever do that, don’t ever want to make me feel like the villain here, I am the Adam in this story’’. I retaliated in anger. I want you out of my life I don’t want to ever see your face you disgust me every part of skin screams when you’re around me I hate you okay I hate you’’. ‘’you’re angry and you don’t mean what you’re saying right? Tell me you’re kidding you don’t hate me say it say it!’’, he shouted at the top of his lungs I trembled with sudden fear however I stood my ground and replied him roaring also at him with my every might, ‘’I loathe you every breath you take I wish it was a curse upon you I want to end so bad it’s suffocating me you took away everything from me just when I found someone who cares for me so deeply you ruined it just like every demon I’ve faced’’, in spite of saying these hurtful words to his pride I still felt pity somehow and a little guilt but whatever this guy had his way with my body atleast I won’t let him anywhere near my soul.
Two weeks later; gift’s room
‘’you know you were amazing tonight, you blew my mind I am so….so….blown ’’, ‘’I don’t know if I should be offended or feel special’’. We had started having sex for the first time since the heated argument I had with Will, we were straight up on no speaking terms he had tried to breach them many times but I made sure my point came across. ‘’no I mean like babe you never cease to amaze me and just want you to always feel like a queen in my chess world’’, ‘’that’s nerdy so fucked up nerdy you know and I love it’’ he went for my lips and claimed them for some minutes he maneuvered his tongue all round my mouth caressing me with his hand I let out a couple of moans from him now cupping my soft tender neck spot in his mouth sensually. He enjoyed the way I begged for more without even letting out any words, then suddenly his phone rang ‘’I have to take this love I’ll be right back’’, ‘’okay don’t keep me too long or you won’t see your lovely smile keeper’’ he then proceeded to kiss me on the cheek and looked lustfully at me as if he would devour me right there. I waited for him in bed until I lost track and slept. He stood me up and it was not the first time I remembered Will’s touch how I didn’t lie when I said he made my skin scream in front of him I yearned him and actually missed his embrace how he made me cum just by the seductive kisses he laid on my skin like a florist sowing roses in his garden. ‘’why the fuck I’m I thinking about him’’.
Month later; my room and gift’s room
I was on a heated argument with Gift the last night and it was still tense so I decided that after class I would talk to him and get laid somehow I’ve been yearning a certain touch not his but if he did make love to me maybe I would forget about the underlying desire. I decided to surprise Gift at his room but as always as I suspected he was with another girl, ‘’love what are you doing here I…it’s not what it seems like…love…love’’ so many thoughts were running in my mind but my first thought was to run as fast I can, I wasn’t going to cry I had already saw the signs him being on long hours on the phone, standing me up on date nights. I went up into my room and tried to catch some breath I never shed a tear for a boy I promised myself that after some heartfelt pain, I laid on my and just decided well it’s over now and some people would be glad in ended in tears for him though not me.
