The Invisible

Charlie walked into his room and immediately faceplanted on his bed, causing the wooden supports to slightly bow and groan under the sudden weight. “Ugh! I’m pathetic,” he said to no one in particular.

“I mean, honestly, what the fuck is wrong with me. I think about it almost every second of the day and yet I never have the balls to actually go through with it.” He rolled his eyes as he made a move to roll over onto his back, instantly regretting that he hadn’t bothered to take off his book bag before dramatically falling into his bed. He shifted uncomfortably, feeling the contents of the bag jab into his back. Another thing to add to his long list of mistakes. Throwing his arms up into the air as if the universe might provide him with some direction if he continued on with his rant, he continued, eyes looking around for a mysterious sign that he was sure would come if only he found the right spot to focus on.

“Honestly, I should just fucking give up and try to move on with my life. This cannot be healthy for me. Sigh. Who am I fucking kidding? I know I won’t move on. It’s basically impossible to move on when I have to see him every day. Every. Damn. Day! I mean, I guess I don’t have to see him, but if I didn’t, it would totally be out of character for me. For us. I mean, we’re best fucking friends. And while I love him in a way that is definitely more than platonic and also lust for him during those late-night moments when he is the only thought that can take me over the edge, I know it’ll never happen.”

Finally deciding to end his agony, Charlie stood up from the bed with a loud sigh escaping his lips and took his bookbag off before beginning to pace the room and think of the pros and cons of what a relationship with Eric would look like. “Pro. I know him better than anyone else.” A smile broke out on Charlie’s face as he realized just how true that was. “Shit! I know stuff even his parents don’t know”, he thought to himself. “Good job, Charlie! You’re off to a good start.” He stopped in front of the full-length mirror that stood in the corner of his minimalist, but functional bedroom. “Ugh! Con. You are an overweight blob, while Eric has the sculpted body of a Greek god. Abs. Bubble butt. Defined arms and legs.” Charlie smirked to himself, feeling his dick slowly start to stiffen in his pants. He reached down to give it a squeeze, instantly causing a spot to appear on the front of his light-colored pants. He shook his head to rid himself of the thoughts that were usually reserved for late-night and begin to adjust his still hard dick to a more comfortable position in his pants as he continued on with his list.

“Another major con. He’s my best friend and I would never want to do something that would compromise that relationship. No matter how much just the sight of him or hearing that deep belly laugh he does when something is extra funny makes me want strip down and let him have all of me.” Whoops! Charlie mentally chastised himself for letting his thoughts wander to the dark side again as he tried to remember the last time he’d cum. He made a mental note and set an appointment with himself for later on. Charlie knew that he was easily aroused when it comes to Eric, but it usually takes more than just a single thought. Usually, he’d have to be picturing Eric naked and them getting it on, but today, any thought of Eric was cause for immediate rise.

As he tried to shake the thoughts from his mind for the second time in less than an hour, the another con emerged. “Damn, I’m really over here plotting a relationship with Eric and he is in a whole damn relationship with someone already. And it’s not like the person is awful. They’re actually pretty damn great. Ugh! I had to even admit those words, but Eric and I have history! Shit! But, I’m not a damn homewrecker, so no matter how much I want enjoy all of Eric and vice versa, I better relax because I’m sure that would only fuck up what they have and what we have.”

Charlie thought about flopping down on his bed again, but fought the urge and instead sat down at his surprising clean (for once) desk and looked at himself in the mirror. “Why do I have to be such a moral hoe!?! I mean, I guess I am. I’m a virgin, so who knows if I really am a true hoe, but I for sure know I have hoe tendencies. Just a look at my PH and the things I like on my super-secret Twitter account that no one knows about (I hope!) will tell you that.” Charlie made a mental note to revisit that twitter later and add to his collection once he’s in bed and can enjoy himself fully before he staring in the mirror and looks at himself again.

Sighing. “Of course, how could I forget? Eric doesn’t even know that I fucking exist. At least not in any sense outside of friendship, that’s for damn sure. It’s eating me up inside, but it’s probably for the best that I just swallow my feelings and stfu. Yea, that’s for the best, right? Ugh! I’m so screwed.”

As he resigned himself to being the invisible best friend to Eric for the rest of his life, he heard his mom call him down for dinner. Finally, a bright spot in this miserable teenage life. Dinner was always an escape for Charlie. Not only did his mom cook amazing food, but he was super close to his family, and if he was being honest, he kinda missed them when they were all apart doing their own things. Even though his older brother Simon could be a bitch and often times teased him about his weight and lack of activity, Charlie knew that if someone else did it, Simon would be there to fuck them up.

Charlie ran blindly down the stairs, bumping directly into Simon, who turned and gave a bit of a scowl. “Sheesh! He must have had a tough day. I just bumped him. Not like I stole his gf or something” Charlie thought to himself. “Watch where you’re going, chubster!” Simon growled. Charlie figured this must be one of those days when Simon was going to be a bitch. “Don’t fucking call me that! You know I’m sensitive about my weight, so stop saying that shit and using it against me! And who the hell shit in your cereal to have you all bent out of fucking shape tonight” Charlie countered. Simon shoved Charlie a little before walking off without saying anything, leaving Charlie confused, but he was hungry, so fuck it. “Simon, I love you, but you better get your shit together” Charlie thought as he walked into the dining room to eat dinner.

Apparently, dinner was all Simon needed to calm down, because at the dinner table, he was acting like his old self, which Charlie appreciated because he did not want to have any issues with his brother. Though what Simon did wasn’t exactly cool, Charlie knew family was important, so he was willing to let it go…this time. At the dinner table everyone shared the highlights of their day and then gossiped about the people who were getting on their nerves and who did what to whom. It was nice. Charlie loved these moments. They helped him forget about he who shall not be named (yeah right!) and also helped him focus on something other than his body, which he was thankful for. Short-lived as they might be, he enjoyed dinner with his family.

As Charlie finished his second helping of everything, his mom and dad began to clear the table, which Charlie took as a sign to escape to his room, do his homework, and get to bed. He slowly slipped away from the table and raced up the stairs, closing his door. “Charlie!!!! Why are you the only one not helping to clean up? You ate dinner here, just like the rest of us!” his dad yelled from the kitchen. “Sorry, dad! Homework calls! I know you want me to be top of my class, so I gotta work hard!” he called back down. He could hear both his parents laughing at his excuse, knowing that they only partially bought it. Happy that he had escaped from dish duty once again, Charlie sat at his desk and begin to work on his essays for English Lit. and American History, hoping that he could knock them out before passing out.

A few hours and several pages of hopefully A-plus essays later, Charlie was finished. Charlie yawned as he looked over at the clock and realized it was almost 12am. Packing up his bookbag for the morning, he went to turn off the light before quickly stripping down to his boxers and avoiding the all-seeing eye of the mirror in the corner. If he did not look, he would not see. This was the arrangement he made with himself as he slipped underneath his covers and let the warmth envelope him. His bed felt so good after being out of it all day, instantly making Charlie close his eyes and try to drift off to sleep. “Oh, damn! I forgot to look at Twitter so I could jack off before bed! Whatever! I’ll do it in the morning when I wake up” Charlie told himself as his eyes shut and he drifted off to sleep.