1. So it begins
I can feel the thunder in my weins. It feels like waves of wind and water under my skin. What is happening? There is nothing but grey sand around me and a forest of bare trees wave violently in the distant horizont, yeat there is no wind. There is nothing but a deadly silence around me. I grip my forehead as suddenly there is what feels like a roar of thunder in my head. It feels like I could go deaf any second now.0
And then I feel something move closer. A darkness, it creeps up and tries to take a hold of me. It doesn't matter how hard I fight, I can't move my legs and I look around to figure out what to do.
Then suddenly I see them. Two figures near the line of trees. I can only see their backs as they are facing away from me, looking at the forest as if waiting for someone to come out of there.
"See me. Please, just SEE ME FOR ONCE..." I scream at them and just when I notice they start to turn my way, I feel hands on my throat. Then, suddenly there is nothing but black.
Once again I come to my senses, gasping for air as I abruptly awake from my dream. I can still feel the remnants of clammy hands around my throat. I try to relax as I take in my surroundings and lie on my back on the bed.
I turn my head to look at the glass wall in front of me as the sun rises and blinds my sight. I sigh and turn to lay on my side on the queen size bed. Damn those nightmares. Thank God I don't use the blinds as the rising sun wakes me before anything bad happens in my dreams. I don't sleep in the dark anymore.
I slowly get out of bed and enter my ensuite. I turn the water running in the shower. I take my t-shirt and sweats off and step under the hot water as steam surrounds me. I wash my hair and just stand under the running water and try to relax. I've managed to almost calm myself down and almost jump up when my phone comes to life.
I groan and turn the shower of. I make my way out and tie a towel around my body as I look at the screen of my phone on the bathroom counter. Did I leave it here last night? I sigh and answer it, annoyed. "What?"
"Well good morning sunshine. Who shat on your pillow last night?" Elise asks and I chuccle. She always makes my mood turn better.
"Nightmare." I tell her, make my way out of the bathroom and sit on the bed. It's always the same situation in the dream, I see them but I don't know who they are or see their faces. I just know I have to get to them so I'll be safe. And every time the darkness gets me before they turn, just before the rising sun wakes me up.
"I'm sorry, girl. Was it that dream again? I'm telling you, you have to do something more than just work and home. Out, tonight?" There is worry in her tone and I look at my reflection in the mirror.
"Yeah, same one. And okay, out." I nod my head. I hear a squeal and clapping of hands on the other end. "Call you later for details, okay?"
"I'll be at work until four. Get your ass to my place by six and we can start from there. Deal?" she says, excitement in her voice and all I can do is agree. I finish the call and stand up, looking at my reflection in the mirror that is placed in the corner of my bedroom. I drop the towel on the bed and take a few steps closer to see myself clearly from the reflection.
I know I've lost weight recently as the dreams are coming repeatedly now. They make me feel stressed, on the edge. I still have a small curve where my hips widen slightly from my waist but my stomach is flat and my thighs are more thin than I'd like. My breasts are perky but small and my dark pink areolas stand out from my fair skin. I move my head to the side and my waist long, light blonde hair cascades down my left shoulder, hiding my other breast. I run my hands through it, looking at the natural waves that flow through my fingers like water.
I flutter my light blonde lashes. I know I look tired as I see dark circles under my eyes. I frown my blonde brows, knitting them together as I try to remember when was the last time I slept well. I can't recall a night without that dream. I look at my eyes, one pale blue and the other golden brown. I run my finger along the ridge of my small nose and look at the light freckles on there and my cheeks. I pout my plump, pale lips and feeling somewhat displeased of my looks, I sigh.
Just as I'm about to turn and get some clothes to put on, I feel a jolt go through my body and I drop to my knees, a scream escaping my lips as I grap my head between my hands. I fall on my back on to the floor and feel my body convulse as my vision blurs. I gasp for air and concentrate, feeling the fit slowly ease and finally pass but I know another one might be just around the corner. Might help to know what the hell are they.
I slowly get up from the hardwood floor and make a mental note to buy some thick carpets. I make my way to my walk in closet and put on some underwear. I just go for some black tights and a dark grey, large hoodie as I deside to go get some breakfast from the near by bakery. I pull on my brown combat boots and slip my phone and keys in my pocket.
As I get in the elevator, I start to think why just now I had another episode. I haven't had those in five months, not since I moved here. I groan at the thought of having to move again, not because of the whole packing and finding a new place but because I like this town. And for the first time in decades, I have a friend. I don't feel so lonely here and I feel reluctant to run anymore.
As the elevator reaches the ground floor I get out of the building. I get my phone to check my emails as I navigate through the morning rush.
Just as I'm about to step into the small bakery, I hit a wall of muscle with a force and as I'm about to fall back on my ass, a pair of strong hands grab me by the arms and easily pull me agains a firm chest. I gasp out loud out of surprise and just stare straight ahead, looking at a black shirt.
Slowly I turn my head up to see a man more than a head taller than myself. He is looking at me with dark brown eyes which have a golden ring around the iris. His eyelashes are long and pitch black. I can't think of anything to say, my mind a total blank as I feel heat spread up my arms where he is still holding me and I know we are way too close to each other. A tingling feeling is going up my arms now, making its way to the pit of my stomach. For the first time since I don't even remember when, I feel a warmth in my core that I thought I would never feel again.
I notice he is staring at my lips and I start to take a step back but the man won't let go of me. I raise an eyebrow and clear my throat a little and the man seems to snap out of whatever trance he was in. He hastily let's go of my arms and we both take a step back. I finally release my breath I didn't even notice I was holding all this time.
I mutter a 'sorry' from under my breath and quickly go around the man to get my breakfast. When I finally get my extra large black take away coffee and a few fresh cheese croissants, I make my way back to the street. I take a sip from my coffee cup and sigh as I feel myself slowly beginning to wake up properly. I start my way back to my apartment building and take a bite out of the croissant.
"Hello. I wanted to apologize for running into you." A deep, sultry voice comes from behind. I jump in surprise and start to cough as I inhale the crumbs in my mouth. Damn it, this isn't my morning.
"Shit. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." The voice sounds a bit frantic now and I raise my hand up to wave the whole thing off as I keep on leaning forward and coughing.
"It's fine. I'm fine, you can go now." I mumble out between coughs. I take a sip from my coffee and finally feel a bit better.
"You good?" I hear from my side and turn my head to look into those beautiful golden brown eyes again.
"Yeah, yeah, all good. Thanks." I smile and start to walk away. To my surprise the man follows me and I groan internally. This is anything but good.
"So, do you visit the bakery often?" The man asks and I stuff my mouth full of croissant so I can't answer him. I just point at my mouth, shrug my shoulders and walk faster. The only problem is, with my height of 5'7, my step is no match to the stride of a person at least 6'5 tall.
"Okay, so not a social person then?" He keeps going and follows me effortlessly as I try to escape the situation.
"Something like that." I answer blatantly. I turn a corner, suddenly slipping through the front door of my apartment building and quickly make my way through the lobby to the elevators. As I step into one of them and turn to push the button to my floor, I see the man standing on the street, staring at me through the front door window with a frown on his face. I can't help but smirk and rise my coffee cup up in mock toast, just as the doors close.
I sigh and lean on the back wall with my eyes closed as I wait for the elevator to reach the 22nd floor. When I hear the ding that indicates I've reached my destination, I make my way to the end of the hall.
I open the front door to my beautiful corner apartment and put my keys in a bowl on a small dresser as I make my way through to the open kitchen and living room area. I put the take away coffee cup and the paper bag containing two more croissants on the island in front of the refrigerator. I open the freezer and pull out a packet of ice cream. I take a spoon from a drawer and walk to my big, white sofa as I put on a movie and sink in a sea of fluffy cushions.
I take a look at my surroundings and have no idea where I am. I'm laying down on my back on a field of wild flowers, in a clearing in the middle of a thick forest. The sky is bright blue and the smell from flowers is intoxicating. I can't hear any sounds coming from the surrounding nature and I'm alarmed. What's going on? It's way too quiet. I sit up and watch around as I notice there are no birds or insects anywhere.
Suddenly a very large wolf steps from the shadow of the forest and stops at the edge of the clearing. I see it watching me with golden eyes as it sits down. I just stare at the magnificent beast, not able to move. The wolf has cream coloured fur and the tips of his ears and his snout are almost white. I notice the slow movement of its tale, going from one side to the other. Is it waving its tale at me? Okay, I've had enough.
I take a deep breath and cock my head to my side. I blink and the wolf is suddenly on its feet, alarmed. I hear the loud crack in the air and I chuckle. A dream? Why didn't I know it from the start? I look as the wolf suddenly charges, moving quickly towards me.
"Silly mutt." I wiggle my index finger in the air and stand up as the wolf closes the distance quickly between us. Just before it reaches me I snap my fingers and the scene in front of me shatters into millions of pieces.
"...ate..."
There is an echo of a word in the air but I ignore it. A whisper of no meaning, an after affect of the weird dream. I open my eyes and I'm back on my couch. I pull myself up from the comfort of the fluffy pillows and look at the clock. 5.20 PM. Shit. I slept the whole day?
I'm moving now, running to the bathroom to put on make up to cover the dark circles under my eyes and then I'm already in the closet, trying to figure out what to wear. Shit. I have no idea where we're going.
I end up wearing just ripped, black skinny jeans and a deep green halter top. Pulling on my black combat boots, I stuff my keys and phone in the pockets of my jeans and deside it is just fashionable to have a birds nest-hair look. I hope I have time to do something to it later as I tie it in a loose bun. I grab my black leather jacket from a chair in the hallway and run out of my apartment to the elevators. As I head down I decide to walk the six block distance to Elise's place.
I speed down the sidewalk when I get a strong feeling I'm being watched and suddenly stop in my tracks. I look around but don't see anything out of the ordinary. I look at the clock, 5.52 PM. I start walking again, looking around to make sure there is nothing out of place. I can't see anything weird and think it was just my imagination playing a trick on me.
I'm almost at the front entrance of Elise's apartment building and scan my surroundings once more. When I'm sure everything is normal I pull the door open and enter the lobby. I make my way to the elevator and push the call button, waiting for it to arrive. I take my phone out and see a message from Elise, asking where I am. The elevator dings and I start to write a message to inform her that I'm downstairs, heading up.
As I try to enter the elevator, I bump into someone exiting it. For the second time today I mutter a 'sorry' still typing on my phone and step aside to make room for the other person to get out. To my surprise I'm yanked forward to the elevator by my arm and I snap my head up to see a pair of golden brown eyes.
I quickly turn around and try to exit the elevator but the doors close and I'm left standing in front of them, still in the elevator. I sigh and rest my forehead against the cool surface. This is not happening, I don't believe in chances so there is something going on. I just need to quickly find out what.
"Are you just going to ignore me?" a voice booms in the elevator and I have a yearning to turn around and lean against his chest. Okay now I know there is definitely something wrong, I have never felt this way. Fuck.
"Yes." I answer dryly.
"Look at me!" His voice is demanding and I'm trying to remain calm. I open my eyes and realize the elevator isn't moving. I groan as I blink my eyes and suddenly feel the elevator go up.
"What the hell?" I hear confusion in his voice and close my eyes again, waiting for the elevator to reach Elise's floor. Thankfully she lives on the eighth so it doesn't take us long to arrive there and as soon as the doors open I'm moving. Damn my bad luck, I'm too slow.
I feel his hand on my arm and suddenly I'm twirled around as my back hits the corridor wall. I gasp as I feel my arrousal rise as he pins me between him and the wall. Defiantly I raise my head and look at him from under my brows. His hands are on both sides of my head and his knee is pressed between my thighs as I rest my hands on his firm chest. I feel so small compared to this mountain of man and have the urge for once in my life to just let my guard down.
"We need to talk." He whispers in my ear, sending a shiver down my spine.
"No." I state firmly, looking traight into his eyes and I see them widen. There is clear confucion in his gaze and I realize he isn't used to being refused or talked back.
"Alpha." Parting my lips just lightly, I whisper in a voice so quiet a normal person shouldn't be able to hear but his pupils dialate and confirm my suspicion.
Shitshitshit.
I notice he is staring at my lips, his eyes turning dark brown now. I know his wolf is trying to surface, trying to break free. Why? And why can't I see his color? I'm so confused at the whole situation I'm not paying enough attention to what is happening.
Suddenly his lips are on mine as he is kissing me, almost frantically. I hear a growl rise from his chest as he tries to deepen it, running his tongue along my lower lip and I moan and give him access. His tongue sneaks into my mouth and I swear I feel the floor tremble beneath my feet.
I moan again as he runs his hands along my sides and finally places them on my ass as he grabs it roughly, picks me up and guides my legs to wrap around his waist. I put my hands around his neck and feel his arousal clearly between my legs as I grind myself against him. A low growl arises from his chest and vibrates through me, making me even more lost in the moment.
"Don't!" He growls, never breaking the kiss and I hear the command in his voice as I grind myself against him again. I try to concentrate, get out of the situation but I've never felt like this before and for the first time in forever, I'm scared. It's like I'm not in control of my body.
I open my eyes and pull back from the kiss, gasping for air and push him back.
"Stop." I gasp out and try to wiggle away from his hold. He grabs me, pulling me tighter against his body and I moan again as I feel him hard against my core. He places hot kisses along my jawline, down my neck and when he reaches the sensitive spot near my collarbone, I gasp when I feel his teeth graze it ever so slightly. I flip my head back and look at the ceiling, feeling my eyes turn completely black.
"STOP." I shout out, hearing my voice a mix of a growl and a grunt as it echoes through the air and I feel I'm on the edge of loosing control. I blink a few times, feeling my eyes slowly turn back normal and hastily snap my fingers.
The next moment I'm leaning against the wall, feeling like my legs are about to give up on me. The man is sitting on the floor, his back against the opposite wall of the hallway, trying to suck in air in his lungs after the blow that send him flying just seconds ago.
"Well that escalated quickly." I sigh as I shake my head, trying to think straight. I watch as the man finally gets his breathing under control and walk in front of him. I place my index finger on his forehead as he raises his gaze at me, looking at me strait in the eyes. The feeling in the pit if my stomach is back in a heartbeat and the heat is spreading again all over my body. What is going on?
"Amitto Memoriam." I whisper as my eyes turn completely black again and I watch his turn white. I really don't want to do this but it's dangerous for him to remember me when I don't know who he is or what is the meaning of everything going on between us. I don't like not knowing, especially when it raises feelings in me I've never felt before.
I walk to Elise's apartment door and I wait for her to answer after I knock a few times. When the door finally opens, I quickly turn my head to look back and I see the man standing in front of the elevator. Just before he turns to look at my direction, I hastily make my way inside the apartment and close the door.
