It's only the beginning
My buddle of joy is gone & never coming back at a time I need my man , babyfather the most you were somewhere laid up with a chick
Consoling her ! But what about me ? Now I'm Otw home from being released 3 days in the hospital having a dead baby and coming home to depression. Looking and searching for a shoulder to cry because once again your gone . That's hurt ! I cried for weeks I hated myself most because I felt like this was my fault I don't know I was stressing because I'm so worried about what the farther of my child is doing that I can't focus on myself & my child that was fuck up number one ! I knew before all this that you the father of my child didn't want this baby we took a trip to the abortion clinic but yes NO! I couldn't do it they told me my baby had a heartbeat gave me entire ultrasound photo of a baby that was grown no flutters a human so I backed out and anything I accepted after that was my fault because I should've just got rid of my baby from the beginning & ended our relationship because from that day forward when you decided to want to force me to have this abortion I should've accepted that and been gone out your life and we wouldn't be stuck with the problems and situations that are yet to occur . Baby gone , I'm home & I still can't get you to act right so at this point I feel I'm done I'm ready to leave all this walk away from 3 years at this point . Until your sorry you ready to come home you wanna make it but can I really trust you ? How do I regain back a ounce a trust I had back to someone's who gave me ever reason not trust you . I'm hurt I need you most and you wasn't there that still kills me ! But fuck it let's move on if your willing to do right by me I'm willing to try to trust you again but I need assurance , acknowledgment , honesty & consistency because without how can we work ? I don't know but I'm trying again I just hope I don't get hurt !
