The Egos

“Okay, I’ll be back in a few days and then I’ll pick you up.” Amy was explaining one last time. “Mark will help you with meeting everyone, got it?”

“Yup.” Mark and I both said at the same time. He sounded pretty confident, but I was just a little nervous. It was my first time meeting any of … the egos. Mark and Amy said they were fine, just take a little while to get used to. I mean, sure, I believe them, but it’s probably gonna be weird seeing Mark’s face everywhere!

We drove into the parking lot of a building. It had two stories and was just a bit bigger than a regular house.

“If you need anything at all, Mark will help.” She repeated, looking at Mark. "Right?"

“I got it.” Mark said.

“I’ll probably be fine.” I said. And with that, Amy drove off.

“So, everyone’s just in there?” I asked Mark.

“Well, … not everyone.” He said, looking up.

“What do you-” I was cut off by someone jumping down from a tree. He was wearing a red, velvet, robe, and a crown. Like he was a king or something! He looked at me and stood up. He had Mark’s face. No doubt, this was one of his egos. The lower part of his face had … peanut butter on it?

“Hi.” He said, simply.

“Who are you?” I said, in shock.

“I’m King of the Squirrels.” He said. I looked at Mark and he just shrugged, like this was completely normal for him. It probably was.

“Oh. I’m Emma. … Why do you have peanut butter on your face?” I laughed.

“I’m gonna let the squirrels lick it off.” He said. I just stared at him. He was … not crazy, but close to it.

“Why?” I asked and Mark had his here-we-go-again look on his face.

The King of the Squirrels ran away shouting, “CUZ, I’M KING OF THE SQUIRRELS!!” Then he climbed up a tree. Yup, he was crazy.

“Just call him King.” Mark said, like nothing even happened. I tried to act as nonchalant as I could. “Let’s just go insi-”

“Who’s that?” I asked, cutting him off. I saw someone outside the building. Two people, actually. One of them was skateboarding or something, and the other was just watching with his arms crossed.

“Oh….” Mark said, boredly. “That’s Bing and Google.”

“‘Bing and Google’?” I repeated. I couldn’t help but laugh at the names. “What are they doing?” I asked, walking toward them. Mark put his arm in front of me, stopping me.

“I wouldn’t get too close to Bing … or Google, I guess.”

“Why not, though?” I looked at him waiting for him to answer. He put his arm down.

“You really wanna know?” He asked, looking at me … smiling.

“Uhh …” What was I supposed to say? “Yes?”

“Okay, then.” He motioned for me to follow him, then started walking toward them. They both had Mark’s face, too, but I could definitely tell them apart from him and each other. Google had glasses and a blue shirt, with the Google G on it. And Bing had sunglasses and a black shirt with the yellow Bing logo. When Bing saw us, he got off of his skateboard.

“Sahhh, dude!” He said. Oh, jeez. “Hey, Mark! I was showing Google here my awesome skateboarding skills!”

I looked over to Google. He looked aggravated and I could see why.

“I’m just trying to get out of the house.” Google said, his voice sounding a little glitched out.

“What’s going on in there?” Mark asked. Google gave him a look. “Oh.”

“What?” I asked.

“Uh, nothing. Let’s just go inside.” Mark said.

“See ya, dudes!” Bing said. He was … annoying.

We walked inside the house and into a room with a couch with a small table in front of it. The table had a typewriter on it. There was a tv mounted on the wall in front. There was someone sitting on the couch. I jumped when I saw him.

“Emma jumps at the sight of the Host sitting on the couch, narrating.” He said. He looked crazy! He had on a beige coat and a bloody blindfold. And a strand of his hair looked a bit … golden. Apparently, his name was the Host.

“Hey, Host.” Mark said.

“The Host gives a simple smile to Mark in response, and goes back to writing.” He said. Does he always refer to himself in third person? That’s probably gonna get annoying.

“That’s Host.” Mark said, as we started walking again. “He likes to write and he narrates pretty much everything that happens. Try not to get on his bad side, okay?”

“Or what?” I asked nervously.

“Let’s just say he has … a gift when it comes to narrating.” He said. “But anyway, I-”

“MARK!” Someone else rushed and gave Mark a huge hug.

“O-okay, Will!” Mark said, gasping for air. Will put him down.

“Sorry, old friend!” He said. “Who’s this?” He asked, looking at me.

“This is my friend, Emma. She’ll be staying here with us for a while. Emma, this is-”

“Wilford Warfstache! So nice to meet you!” He cut him off. He held out his hand, but all I could focus on was the gun tucked in his pocket. “Oh, no need to worry about that!” He said. Will had on a long-sleeved, yellow shirt with pink suspenders and brown pants. His hair was dyed a hot pink color and he had a pink, curled-up mustache. How much pink could one man have?

Mark leaned over to me. “Try not to talk too much with this one.” He whispered. I nodded in response.

“Um, nice to meet you, too.” I said, shaking his hand. When he - finally - let go, I noticed something red on my hand. “Umm…. Mark?”

“Oh, that’s nothing!” Wilford said.

“Will! Emma, just go rinse it off. There’s a sink over there.” He pointed to a room that looked like a kitchen. I went in and rinsed my hand off. I could hear Mark whispering something to Will, and he didn’t sound too happy. At first, he was whisper-yelling, then they both went quiet.

“Okay, fine.” I could hear Mark say. “Well, have you seen...” His voice trailed off after that. Had he seen who? I walked back out and they turned silent.

“Okay, Will, I’m gonna take Emma to meet some of the others.” Mark said.

“Fine by me.” He said, then started to … polish his gun…? He was weird, too. Well, what did I expect? We walked down a hallway and someone else came running toward Mark.

“SENPAI!!” He yelled. He literally tackled Mark with a hug! “SENPAI!”

“Mark, are you okay?!” I asked.

“Stay away from Senpai!” The other ego said.

“Get off me, Yan!” Mark said. He immediately got off him and stood up straight, waiting for Mark to get up. He looked like a girl in a way. He wore a … uh, girl’s sailor shirt and a blue skirt, I think. His hair was dyed red. He also seemed to have something red stained on his shirt.

“Yan?” I asked.

“Sorry, Emma. This is Yan.” Mark leaned over to me. “Don’t get too close when he’s around.”

“To you or him?” I whispered.

“Both.”

“Senpai, who’s this?” Yan asked.

“Don’t worry, this is Emma. She’s my friend.” He emphasised the word friend.

“Oh, okay. Where’s Amy?” He asked.

“She’s gone for a few days.” Mark said and Yan looked like he was fighting a smile. “Now, it’d be great for me if you would stay in the room you were in for a little while longer, Yan. Okay?”

“Okay, Senpai!” He ran back into the other room that he’d jumped out of. What is it with him and calling Mark “Senpai”?

“Okay, let’s go.” Mark said, sprinting away.

“What’s his deal?” I asked, kind of amused.

“Nothing, just come on.” Mark opened the door to a random room. When we went in it looked like some sort of check up room. There was someone else there who looked kind of like a doctor. He turned to us.

“Hello, Mark. I didn’t know you were here already.” He said. I would’ve thought that was Mark if it wasn’t for him wearing doctor’s clothes. “Mark, I’m afraid I have bad news.”

“What is it, Doctor?” Mark said.

“I’m sorry … you’re dying.” Mark rolled his eyes.

“Okay, then. Well, this is Emma. Emma, this is Dr. Iplier. Iplier, she’s gonna be here with me for a few days, okay? So don’t try to diagnose her with anything.”

“Okay, but what if-”

“Anything.” Mark repeated.

“Okay, okay, fine.” Dr. Iplier said. “Well, I hope you two have a good time here.” Mark and I walked out after saying thanks.

“How many more are there?” I asked, excitedly. I was actually having a pretty good time meeting everyone.

“There are just a few more. One’s in here, no doubt.” We walked into a room and someone was standing in front of a mirror, fixing his hair. “Hey, Bim.”

“Mark! So good to see you again!” He went to hug Mark, but stopped, looking at the suit he was wearing. He then just held out his hand for Mark to shake. He looked over to me. “And who’s this?”

“This is Emma. She’s staying with me here for a while.”

“Hello, Emma. I’m Bim Trimmer!” He said Bim Trimmer in an exaggerated voice, like he was on one of those weird game shows.

“He has his own game show.” Mark said. I should’ve guessed!

“Hi.” I said. Bim looked like Mark, but with a suit and glasses.

“Well, I hope you both have a good time here. How many others have you seen?” He asked.

“All except….” Mark said, but stopped.

“Oh. Okay, well, ….” Bim cleared his throat. “Okay, well, … good luck.” He sort of laughed and walked back to the mirror.

“Yeah, thanks so much.” Mark said in a sort of sarcastic voice.

“All except who?” I asked when we walked out of the room.

“Uh … no one. It’s fine. Let’s just be done for now.”

“Mark, please?” I begged. What? I’m a curious person!

“Just for now. If he wants to see us, then he will. We shouldn’t bother him, though.” I just nodded. Mark sounded serious.

We spent a while just talking to everyone and watching Bim’s show - which was crazy! -, with no sign of this other ego that I, for some reason, can’t see. I looked at the clock and we’d been here for three hours, already! It was ten at night. Now that I thought about it, I was actually getting a little tired. I yawned without knowing it.

“I think you should probably get some rest.” Mark said to me.

“Okay.” I said, simply. He led me to a guest room and I just layed down for a while. Even though I was tired, I couldn’t sleep. I was too busy thinking about this mysterious other ego! Eventually I slowly, but surely, gave into sleep.