What is your opinion?
Really good beginning
"I read the first bit of this story and have REALLY enjoyed it thus far. The writing is smooth and has good flow, and I love the interaction between the characters. It is unexpected, but also very natural. I really like the way that you are building Harrington's character so far, with his cocky attitude and desire for thrill. Not much is handed to us in the way of plot, but I like what I see happening so far, with the rivalry between Harrington and that other fighter and the disappearance of Anne's brother. I would like to know more, so I'll definitely be keeping this on my reading list. The one thing that confused me about this story was the gender of the main character. I actually thought that Harrington was a last name, so I wasn't sure whether he was a girl or a guy, and the name "Lovely" threw me off, because I've heard that used as a nickname. I thought he was a girl until I looked back at the blurb. Maybe that's just me, but I thought that it needed more clarification, or maybe just some more physical description. Anyway, I really like where this is going so far, and I'm excited to see what happens next. Great work! I hope that this does well in the contest!"
Well organized plot and characters
"The author knows how to draw the reader in with the story. The girl Harrington, main character has a lot to prove to the world on her identity, being a MMA fighter. I give it 4 stars for originality concept, Harrington has a love interest in the story. Every part of the story is laid out, she had a part time job as a waitress on the side to make ends meet. Sad Anne lost her brother due to bad circumstances. Grammar and punctuation is spot on, sometimes the sex of the main character is unknown until later in the story. Otherwise, not a bad story, well written."
