Chapter 1
Of all the people my heart could’ve chosen, it fixated on a girl who seemed incapable of reciprocating love. She was a beautiful mess of exquisite chaos, evident in her eyes. Her radiance rivalled the sun during the day and mirrored the sophistication of the moon at night. She possessed an allure that inspired me to strive for something greater. I yearned to fight for her, to take her on romantic outings and cradle her to sleep each night. Her lips were soft and perfect, exuding a taste of love whenever she leaned in for a kiss. That’s the kind of girl my heart chose, but alas, it could never be, for she loved another. What pained me even more was the inability to confess my feelings. It would be unfair to burden her with unrequited love, so I endured the slow torment within while wishing for her happiness. It was an unfruitful, agonizing, one-sided love. I had to release it and move forward, for that was the best course of action. However, what if I never forget her? What if, throughout my life, I’m unable to develop feelings for anyone else because they aren’t her? I shall dwell in my melancholic realm and strive to make the most of life. For now, that’s all I can do.
Waiting for something that may never happen is challenging, but relinquishing hope when it aligns with your deepest desires is even harder. Especially when those desires have been etched in your mind since childhood. Nearly seven years have passed since you entered my life, and I will forever remember the day we first met. You were engrossed in conversation with your friends while I played basketball with mine. The ball bounced off the court and rolled into the midst of your discussion, which seemed to revolve around the inadequacy of our teachers and the futility of learning from them. Retrieving the ball led me to you, a stunning brunette with captivating brown eyes and flowing hair. Oh, how your smile melted my heart. I was too apprehensive to approach you, convinced that I would never measure up to your expectations. Nevertheless, none of it mattered, as fate destined you to depart. On the day I bid you farewell, tears streamed down my face.
Her words pierced his heart like a searing blade, causing his entire world to crumble under the weight of unrequited love. He yearned for a profound connection, yet it eluded him, leaving only anguish and sorrow in its wake. He believed he understood the depths of pain, but he was mistaken until he witnessed the way she looked at him. Love’s capacity to hurt overwhelmed him, transforming him into a hapless victim of unreciprocated affection. True love remained elusive, an ever-distant goal he never achieved. Despite having an abundance of love to give, why couldn’t it be received? Was he genuinely undeserving? Had past mistakes branded him with an indelible mark? Was he doomed to a desolate life of solitude, imprisoned within an invisible cage that plagued him incessantly? He thought he knew what real pain felt like, but he didn’t, not until he saw the way she looked at him. He believed he understood the agony of love, but instead, he became a casualty of unrequited affection. As time marched on...
Frankly, Lauv and Troye Sivan got it right. I’m so tired of love songs, tired of love songs, tired of love. They perpetuate the unattainable goal of finding true love and living a blissful existence. The notion that someone will sweep you off your feet and make you feel complete, destined to ride off into the sunset is made of pure fiction. Love like that doesn’t exist in the real world.
