Race you
Ever since I was a child I always wanted to race to the top and see someone be proud of me,
Competitions, school awards, everything that would make someone be in cloud 9.
I achieved more than I thought I could do, but as I try to achieve it, the more my wings stopped moving. The more I wanted to catch your attention the more annoying the flies gathered to me, but I didn’t want others to know that a mere me is in a fight with a pack of flies. I gathered honey and fruits just for you but you were busy looking at them, I treated you well enough but it seems that wasn’t to your liking.
After the conclusion I made, I changed for sure that when I hit puberty I became like a crow that was mocked for but that’s okay because that would change the way you look at me. I played the fool for you, stole some diamonds, and every way that would make you proud of me or even at least acknowledge that I was there. I admit that was thrilling for me, everything that I did at that time made me look at the world with beautiful colors and at that time I felt the most alive.
I don’t know what happened, but time passed and I feel that my win- no my feathers were falling off from my arms that it seems that I was flying too hard that even if I look around, I haven’t move an inch forward but instead I moved backward.
I looked at you and it seems you noticed me but the thing is that the bitterest thing that I first got was “you disappoint me” I mean at least you could’ve come with me with a sweetened candy before a whip.
I remember when we were able to race together, oh wait we weren’t able to. You who were a beautiful dove were busy raising the doves that grew just like you, but I can’t say that I fell far from that nest because I was still caught by your radiance and beauty that I didn’t know what I was looking at.
My siblings who were far beautiful and talented were your shining gem and I was your shining rock, where I know that I was worthless because even if you made a mistake the rock would be there for you while the gems were there to get angry at the human who hurt you. I mean I wasn’t able to really fight for you but I at least was there when the gems didn’t know that you cried crystals while we were at the fountain.
You told us that you were growing old and that your feathers are falling from your wings, so you gave us some gems that we should cherish but I got a rock, a beautiful rock but it was the first thing that I received something without you being able to turn your beak from me. While you were saying something I found the courage to say something but the first words that came out of my beak was “race me.” I said that we would play hide-and-seek and see if someone can spot me and catch me, then if you catch me I will give the most beautiful gems that I gathered and all the spots that I got it from, and finally, you agreed.
While my siblings were finding for me, you mother spotted me and my instinct was to run away until I- I had enough. I had enough so when you were able to catch me, you spot a knife in my wings that were shriveled up and I cut up my wings. Finally, I said “ Oh you win mother, the place that my gems were always beside our house. All I needed was you to finally catch me while looking at me honestly, Happy birthday Mother, and I wish you the best year because I was the reason for your despair.”
While I was falling from great heights, I saw you try to catch me but I came prepared. The flies were always beside me and did their favor in exchange for your safety, and the very first thing that I saw was the sunset from the sky. The beautiful yet sad-looking sun, the look of the flies who were satisfied, the look of yours that were conflicted, and yet I was able to be happy again. I shouted “See who was the first one to die, mother? It’s not about the age.”
Before I fell into the waters, I flipped and saw my face for the first time crying just like you. Crying crystals at that fountain that I found majestic, and for the first and last time I said “I want to live and have a happy end.”
