Chapter 1
Dust invaded the air like a smokescreen. Echos of vibration coursed all around me. My eyes burned from the contact. Trying to wipe it away, I realized something heavy laid on top of my small, fragile body. Letting out a gut ranching cough, blood-splattered out with force. Mama?... Mama?..., I cried out. The refugee camp I had come to think of as home over time had caved in on us. A part of the building laid exposed to the elements. Once the ringing in my ear began to die down, I could hear the wailing of other children, also crying out for their loved ones. The dust started to reside; I could now see that a chunk of the ruble had fallen on me. With all the strength I could muster, I tried to push it off. However, it was no use; it didn’t even budge. From a distance, I could see men franticly searching around for anybody alive. Suddenly, a silhouette engulfed in a halo caught my attention. Through the eyes of a child, one would surely believe this was god coming to greet them to his kingdom.
We have one here; a man called out. As the silhouette reached me, I realized It was not god, but a man with kind green eyes and dark brown hair that seemed aged beyond his years. He was in an army uniform that appeared worn and covered in dirt. Reaching out his right hand, he cupped my face ever so gently. You’re going to be okay, he said. His words, however, were not convincing. I could see the worry in his eyes. Where’s my Mama? I cried out. He hesitated, lost in thought as if trying to search for the right words. After a few seconds, he smiled, Reiterating everything was going to be okay. A group of men soon surrounded me.
On the count of three, we all lift the ruble. The men all spaced out around the ruble and grabbed hold. One... two... three!. They all gripped the ruble and pulled up with force. Slowly the piece of ruble began to lift off me. The man who spoke to me moments ago kneeled behind me and swooped his arms under my shoulders and up, dragging me out from under the rock. I cried in agony from the fast movement. Alright, she’s out. The men gently put the ruble down as not to cause any further harm. First Lieutenant Marks, sir, we need to.
I awoke from my feverish nightmare dripping in sweat. Damn it! I thought I was over this already. It’s been a while since I’ve dreamt this hell. Nine years have passed since that incident. I will always be grateful to Lieutenant Marks. He took me in when nobody else wanted me. I would have died if not for him. Getting up from my cot, I stepped onto the cold hard floor and made my way to the kitchenette. Grabbing the cup next to the sink, I filled it halfway with water from the tap and gulped it down. I stared out through the small kitchen window in a daze. This little trailer on the base was all I owned to my name. Heck, it wasn’t mine anyway. Lieutenant Marks insisted on me have some privacy from the others. So he had this shipped in for me to call home. This trailer is just a place for me to lay my head down and gather my thoughts. Half of the time, I’m away in another country, helping Lieutenant Marks on some assignments, or so I like to believe. Suddenly a shadow caught my eye, snapping me out from my thoughts. It appeared to be heading in my direction. I glanced over at my watch, 0500. I watched as the shadow grow closer. What’s he doing here so early?. I ran back to my cot to quickly put my pants on. A knock at the door broke the silence. My heart was racing; why was I so anxious?. I stood there quiet, hesitant to open the door; A second knock. Still, I did not move. After a moment, his voice filled the silent night air. Astrella, it’s me, Tommaso. Are you awake?. A third knock. I worked up the courage to open the door. Heading towards it, I felt like my heart would leap out of my chest. I slowly reached out my hand towards the doorknob. I exhaled and swung the door open.
We stared into each other eyes without saying a word; with each second, it felt like an eternity. Neither knew what to say. I couldn’t bear the silence any longer. Tommaso, what brings you here?. Sorry, I mean, did something happen?. Can I come in?. we need to talk. Before I could mutter a word, Tommaso slid past me and made his way to the small round table. He laid down his service cap and pulled the chair out to sit. Something seemed to weigh heavily on his mind. Sighing, he dragged his hand through his hair. Look, there’s no easy way to say this, so I’m just going to spit it out. You’re being shipped out to the Maldives today at 0900. The fuck, I am. I’m not going, period. I’m not asking these are orders, Ella. With a serious expression, he said, you know you’re the only person in the world who would ever get away with talking to me like that.
I could feel my face burn red from embarrassment. Fuck! I thought to myself. When am I going to get over him?. My feelings always seem to creep up on me. Hear me out, he said somberly. Your training and skills have not gone unnoticed by the chain of command. As a result of this, you are now the coordinator specialist for a training program of elite soldiers. Here, take a look at these documents. I know I don’t have to tell you that these are classified. Reading through the file just frustrated me even more. He sat there quietly, observing me while I read through the pages. He never took his gaze off me as if trying to process what was racing through my mind. Placing the document onto the small table, I locked eyes with his. You know I can’t just leave Lieutenant Marks; he needs me. Don’t take this the wrong way, but this order came from Lieutenant Marks. Why was the only person who cared for me all these years sending me away?!. I thought to myself. I tried to search for words to say, but I could not help but feel wounded.
For the past six years, I’ve trained night and day as a way to repay Lieutenant Marks. He treated me as if I were his daughter. When he became sick, I felt like my whole world was crashing down on me again.
Ella, he’s not doing this to abandoned you, trust me. He truly cares for you as a daughter. Heck, I believe he loves you more than me, his blood son. He said with a chuckle. I could not help but laugh at his declaration. Are you sure it wasn’t your bright idea to ship me off? I know you’re always trying to get rid of me, I said playfully. Maybe, but unfortunately, it’s not that easy to get rid of you. You see, it looks like you’ll be getting a partner. Little old me!. Great, I said, rolling my eyes. You’re dead meat if you do that again. He tried ever so desperately to look stern as he said it. We stared at each other, no longer able to hold back the laughter, and busted out laughing in unison. It was always so easy for Tommaso and me to be in the moment, yet challenging at the same time. There always seemed to be this invisible wall blocking me from getting closer to him. How can anyone not fall in love with him? He was like the guy next door. Tommaso was always willing to help, genuinely caring, and how could I forget, not bad to look at with his dreamy blue eyes that resembled the sea. His dark brown hair slicked back, His broad shoulders and long legs. Sigh, I’m hopeless. I’m never going to get over him at this rate. God, if you can hear me, help a girl out. The man has already rejected me long ago. I need to move on. I guess he will only ever see me as a sister.
Man, what’s a guy got to do to get a beer around here, he said?. smiling; I said, well, you ought to go to a bar for that!. Ella, I know you keep a stash in here. Hang tight, and let me see what I got left. Grabbing the beers from the fridge, I suggested we make our way outside to the porch. We sat next to each other and starred out to the beautiful starry night. After a few drinks, the hours seemed to blood together, and the next thing we know, the sun started to peek over the horizon. I can’t believe we spent all this time talking, I thought to myself. Well, Tommaso, it looks like our times up, I said, pointing to the sun. Mmm, I guess your right. I better head back to my quarters and prepare the last of my things. Yea, and I need to start; I said, chuckling. With that said, he stood up, dusting off his uniform, and saluted me with a big old goofy grin, and made his way back. Well, there’s no time to waste. I need to hurry and pack. I stood up and made my way back inside the trailer. I sure am going to miss this old rust bucket. Looking around, it felt a bit sentimental in a way. Well, old girl, this is not goodbye forever. Well, see each other again. Enough with the sentiments, I thought; I grabbed all that I thought I would need and hurled it into my duffle bag. I hopped into the shower and made myself presentable. Heading towards the door, I grabbed my service cap and sunglasses that hung next to it. Switching the lights off, I close the door behind me and made my way across the field to the meeting hall for my orders.
