Dark

The coldness was almost unbearable. I could barely feel my toes. My gloves were no help either, my hands were freezing. I reached behind me to pull up my hood, only to be met with the collar. I don’t really know why I bought a winter coat with no hood.

I sigh and take my hands out of my pocket, and put them up to my ears. My ears are frozen, and no doubt, bright red.

I pull my auburn hair out of my hair tie. The wind seemed to pick up as soon as I did that. The snow swirled and blew up all around me. I stopped walking, and waited for the snow to pass. I watched, as the snow moved in perfect harmony.

What a beautiful sight. The way it rained down from the sky and lightly landed on the ground. It seemed almost unreal.

As soon as the wind stopped moving, I put my hair in a low ponytail, so that it would cover my ears.

I began to walk again, as soon as I finished with my hair. I turned left onto Ridge Street, and walked straight down. I looked down at my rugged boots, and watched as they imprinted a design in the snow. I stepped down a little harder so that the design looked bolder.

I hear loud drilling noises coming up ahead of me. I look up and see men drilling and digging up in the streets. I walk closer to the scene and stop when I see a big yellow warning sign in front of me. I look around me and see that the road has been blocked off.

“We’re redoing the roads.” A gruff voice says beside me.

I jolt in surprise, I look to my left and see a middle aged man with a hard hat on.

“What?” I say in a quiet voice.

“We’re redoing the roads.” He repeats.

About time, I think to myself, It was like an obstacle course driving on these roads, but this really wasn’t good news for me.

“Oh, sorry I didn’t know.”

He nods his head, in reply, and goes back to his work.

I turned and walked away. Now what? I thought to myself. This was the same route I took everyday to get home.

I decided that the best idea would be to call my mom so she could come get me. Don’t get me wrong I love walking and the snow, but honestly it was freezing and getting dark. I whipped out my phone, scrolled down in my contacts and pressed, mom. I held the phone to my ear and waited.

“Hello?” a raspy, out of breath voice meets my ear.

“Mom, is that you, are you ok?”

“Yes, why?” She tries to calm her voice, but fails.

“You sound like you ran a marathon.”

“No, I’m just a little tired from working, did you need something, why did you call?”

“Uh, yeah, the road by Ridge Street is blocked off and I don’t know where to go. Could you maybe pick me up?” I asked, a little confused.

“Right now?” she said, letting a puff of air out. “What do you mean the roads blocked off?”

“There redoing the roads, so-”

“Ugh.” she cuts me off.

“Please?” I whisper.

“Bre, I can’t pick you up right now, I’m really busy. Maybe you can take the bus? Walk down another block, and see if the road is blocked off there.” she said in a rush.

“Ok. I didn’t know you were busy. I’ll figure something out.” I say soft tone.

“Ok, bye. I’ll see you at home.” she says quickly.

“Bye.” I say. But she had already hung up.

I sigh again. I seem to be doing that a lot these days.

I suddenly didn’t feel like going home. There really wasn’t much to do there anyways, because nobody’s ever home.

The cold seemed to not have an affect on me anymore. I didn’t feel cold anymore, I felt numb.

Maybe I got so cold, I turned warm. Was that even possible?

My mom was always busy. She was always doing something, and when she came home she was too tired to deal with anything that involved me.

She seemed to be in a rush, always had somewhere to be. She worked long hours as a maid and came home late. She threw herself into work, saying “we have to make money somehow.” But sometimes I felt like she went out of her way to avoid me. Was I really that big of a problem to her?

Growing up, we were never close. It was obvious she didn’t want a child, and didn’t know how to take care of one.

My father left before I was even born. My mom never really talked about him much. She just says he wasn’t ready to be a father, and vanished into thin air.

I always wondered if my dad leaving had an affect on her. She says it didn’t and that he’s in the past and she’s over him. But I can’t help but wonder if my life would be different if he stayed.

I decided that instead of going home to an empty, lonely house, I would walk to a nearby park. Right now I just need to relax and clear my mind. So I spin on my heels and head right, in search of a park.