Chapter 1
If you really don’t want to get found out when you kill someone, I think you should do it in a private place, somewhere no one will find out for a long time. Or at least enough time for you to flee the continent. So... not in one of the most popular and large high schools in the country. Iguess the murderer got one thing right. They killed Principal Saturday in a place no one would ever think to bat and eyelash at: The school basement. That place is dark and dirty, and a person was assaulted there. If you’re wondering why no one looked at the cameras, that’s because theyaren’t any. For on there are so many staff that you can’t swing a bat without hitting, like, 30. If you’re wondering who killed Principal Saturday, nobody knows. Probably because nobody was even there. “Principal Davis Saturday was killed at around 11:55 pm” is a direct snippet from the news that my mother insisted I watch because “Principal Saturday was a good man.” Principal Saturday was a good person, like Saturday. A day of relaxation and rest before a hectic 6 days later, except it was 5 days a week. A lot of people think Vice Principal Hawkthorn did it because Principal Saturday stole his title he earned. Vice Principal Hawkthorn, now Principal Hawkthorn was like Monday but 5 days a week, 24/7. When I’d first met him, I thought he was like and alarm clock. But alarm clocks have a snooze and a stop button. Now that I know him, he’s more like and alarm clock that has no snooze button, nor a stop button, that you have to chase and destroy immediately to have any chance of peace again in your house. You get the point.
My name is Zane Jackson, a very alive 17-year-old in my junior year of high school, whom despite being a dick to everyone I meet on purpose, has many people who consider themselves my friends. None of them are, I don’t even know half of their names, the rest I know only because every time they see me,they’re like I have amnesia: “Hi Zane! Do you remember me? I’m Annoying Human Who Won’t Leave You Alone NO MATTER HOW MANY FUCKING HINTS YOU DROP. NOPE, NOT EVEN IF YOU OUTRIGHTLY SAY ’Hey, _______ can you FUCK OFF!?!?’” Sorry. I’m Zane Jackson, and I go to Hawkthorn High School, and I’m currently being investigated for murder.
