Scars of Sin - Fred Weasley

Within two years, I lost it all: my Oliver Black, my baby, my dignity, my sanity, and myself—all thanks to the defeated Lord Voldemort, my father. I killed him just as I was on the verge of madness, saving myself and the Wizarding World.

For the longest time, I praised him before even finding out he was my father. I did everything as he told me to, killed whoever he wanted dead—for him just to betray me. He killed my mother, almost killed my brother, Harry who I had betrayed, and vice versa. Harry sent me to Azkaban and I sent death eaters to him, but this was all in the past now.

I wanted to start a new life, but how if I felt like I was alone in the world? My godfather, Snape was getting married tomorrow and he already had a beautiful daughter—Eileen. Harry had the Weasley's and his girlfriend. Blaise was dating Luna and they were to go to Italy now that the war was over. Narcissa was dead for saving me and Lucius was now busy making things right with his son. And Deimos had Olivia who was expecting.

Those were my only family left and they already had their own. I felt most alone without my Oliver.

I was basically on suicide watch. I was living in Snape's house as I had been since my 4th year. We usually went our own ways in the house, but now, he was all over me to make sure I didn't attempt anything against myself. I wasn't going to kill myself, but I still could care less if I lived or died.

Eileen was peacefully sleeping in my bed as an eleven-month-old does, while I got ready in front of my vanity. We were going over for dinner the Weasley's, even if I still questioned when the hell Snape befriended them.

Lydia stood at the entrance, reclining on the doorframe with her arms crossed and a frown on her face as she stared at me in anger. Snape liked to have me be distracted with the baby, but Lydia didn't like that one bit. To her, I was nothing more than a waste of space and a criminal for killing Albus Dumbledore. I could care less though. From the moment I met her, she stated damn-well she wanted me out of the way—like if Snape would ever allow that.

I finished putting on my diamond earrings and quickly faked on a smile as I heard footsteps in the hallway along with Snape's voice, "Are you going to be ready any time soon, child?!"

I took one last look at the picture of Oliver, then stood up and went over to carefully grab Eileen and joke, "What are you talking about, godfather? She's been ready for hours." Lydia rolled her eyes and scoffed, turning away, while Snape chuckled and came to kiss my forehead. "Well, then, are my ladies ready?"

I nodded and gave him Eileen so I could apparate to the burrow on my own, feeling nauseous now that I always apparated alone. They must've stayed back arguing because a minute went by and I was still alone.

Thanks to them, I forced to knock on the door and listen as they all argued who would open the door. Some fighting that they were busy and others fighting that they wanted to meet the baby first.

Finally, one of the tallest Weasleys opened the door for me. It was Fred, he wore a black t-shirt that hugged onto his muscles and didn't hide the tattoo's on his arms all too well. His cologne quickly made its way up my nostrils and it smelled incredible. His black leather watch, it was real as it met the eye, unlike the fake ones he used to wear.

With sweaty fists buried in the pockets of my sweater, I vaguely said, "Hey, Weasel," and walked inside to take it off and throw it at him. I used to be surrounded by rich, so I treated him like a servant.

"See the war didn't change your skanky attitude," I heard him mutter, making me instantly circle to tilt my head and question, "What the bloody hell did you just say to me?"

He has been bad news since my fourth year. Everyone turned a blind eye since they were so worried about the dark wizard returning, but it was no secret that he afforded his tattoos by dealing. This little 'tricks' shop was just a distraction for what went on downstairs—or at least that's what the rumors said.

He evilly chuckled then became stern as he harshly spoke, "That despite it all, you're still a fucking bitch, you filthy murderer."

I was face to face with him and my eyes were open ajar as I said, "Oh, darling, if I wasn't a murderer, you most likely wouldn't even be here."

"Oh, was I supposed to say thank you?"

"Enough, Fred!" cried Mrs. Weasley, cutting the tension between us, making us snap out of it and realize almost everyone had been watching us argue. I scoffed at him then weakly smiled as I walked towards Mrs. Weasley's welcoming arms. She was probably the only Weasley I could stand other than Fleur who was technically one by marriage.

"How are you?" she asked, which was all everyone asked me now. Turning down all the depressing answers I could've given her, I just backed away and said, "Better, um- Snape should be here any moment by the way," then walked away to hug, then smack my brother. I was trying to be playful in order to get our old relationship back.

I said hello to mostly everyone, then sat down at the dinner table and was saved as Snape finally walked in with just Eileen. Lydia was such a bitch. She always argued with Snape over me. I couldn't wait to move out and never see her again. I would sure miss Snape though and his incredible cooking.

He sat next to me after saying hello to everyone, watching Fleur and Mrs. Weasley play with the baby. I was pregnant last year, Voldemort poisoned my drink with purpose of killing my baby, then saved just me. He was a coward.

Time flew past me like it was nothing. Everyone ate, chatted, joked, and made a toast while I zoned out. I wanted to be happy, I really did, but it felt impossible. Their laughter was driving me mad since I saw no reason to smile.

After a while, I lied, "Going to the restroom," then stood up and walked out, taking a white pack of cigarettes I found on my way to the exit of the dining room.

I hid by the doorframe and listened to Mrs. Weasley ask Snape, "How's she really doing? Hasn't spoken much this evening."

"Well, she's just—she is trying to portray this person that isn't her. Y/N is strong, yes, but I know just how much pain she is in. Sometimes, I stand outside her door and hear her cry. I don't know if I should give her her space or comfort her sometimes."

Harry spoke up, "Space, she's all about space. Can't live without it." I smiled because it was true. I hated when Snape walked in on me crying.

"I know she lost the man she thought she would spend the rest of her life with, but I wish she would move on. It's selfish, but it hurts me to see her likes this, and I know Oliver would've wanted her to—"

I stood out of the shadow and shook my head as I smiled and said, "You don't know what Oliver wanted. Not even I know what he would've wanted because he was so unpredictable."

"Y/N," Snape said, turning around with regret that he said any of that.

I shook my head and walked away with Oliver on my mind just like every other day. I sauntered out of the burrow and stood against the wall as I placed the cigarette between my lips, only to realize.

"Need a light?" asked the same twin I had encountered when I walked in, flicking the gold lighter on. I recognized him because only he had that smirk he scrutinized me up and down with, and he had more tattoos than his twin. "I'm Fred by the way."

I nodded and walked up to him with the cigarette between my lips as he raised the light to it. I into his eyes that stared down at my mouth or the cigarette I was inhaling as the fire came into contact with the white end. "That's right," he whispered, turning it off. I took the cigarette out of my mouth and exhaled the smoke cloud on his face, then walked away.

I reclined against the wall with my arms crossed and watched as he came to stand by me, suddenly interested in making conversation. "So it's your godfather's wedding tomorrow."

I nodded, exhaling more smoke. "Yes, I'm well aware of that, Weasley."

"You going to be a bridesmaid?"

I shook my head, never taking my eyes off the field in front of me. "Lydia would much rather die than ever have me as her bridesmaid. If anything. I'm only going for Snape—he deserves this happiness he's getting and I don't want to ruin his night by behaving like a snotty bitch."

"That's quite nice of you. Never thought you cared about anyone who wasn't you."

I finally looked back at him. "That's because you don't know me, Weasel bee."

"Maybe someday," he said with a sure tone, then changed the topic. "So what are you doing now that the war is over? Any plans?"

I looked down at my heeled boots and shrugged. "Snape wants me to go back to Hogwarts and finish my education so I can get a good job—that's his excuse. I don't need or honestly want a job. As soon as I turn eighteen, I'm getting all the money Oliver left me. Snape really just wants to keep me monitored."

"So that's it? You really don't want to do anything for the rest of your life?"

I dropped the cigarette to step on it. "Here's one thing you should know: I don't give a fuck about my life anymore." I began walking away, but he took my arm and offered, "Want to get really drunk, then?" I sighed, "Sure," even though I was dying to drink, and Snape wasn't here to stop me.

We sat outside the burrow, drinking a bottle of vodka he sneaked out of the kitchen and we just talked for what felt like hours as we gazed up at the stars above us.

"You think my brother and your sister have done it yet?" I asked, bringing my knees up to my chest, watching his throat as he sipped the last bit of the bottle.

He sighed, "Well, I heard them."

A smiled of shock spread across my face.

Fred nodded, chuckling, "Yeah, everyone went out to Diagon Alley and they assumed so had I, but I stayed reading in the room next to theirs."

I laughed, turning my view back down. "I haven't done it in about a year almost," I blurted out, then slapped my hand over my mouth. I was that drunk.

"Who was the lucky guy?" he asked, peeking over to look at my face.

I hesitated, but eventually answered, "Oliver, the night he died. It was Bill and Fleur's wedding and we snuck to the back of the burrow. We had just finished before the attack."

"Oh."

I nodded, the silence taking over. I was drowsy, things were starting to get blurry and everything was funny to me. I fell back, falling into Fred's shoulder. I turned my view to my right, his lips were the first thing that caught my attention.

He gently caressed my jaw, bringing it to my chin to hold it up with his thumb and forefinger. I looked at his eyes one last time before I brought my lips to gently suck on his until I cupped his face and jumped on my knees to fully kiss each other.

We both got so deep into the kiss, we couldn't back away from it. When I least knew it, he was already carrying me up and opening the door of the burrow for us. Fred put me down and I immediately yanked him forward by his black t-shirt. Gripping on his hair, I moved his head down and shouted, "Tell my father I'm spending the night here!" at Harry as he was walking out of the dining room with Ron and Hermione and I was walking backwards up the stairs.

I reached the beginning of the second floor and Fred quickly pushed me away to his room, tossing me in his bed and locking the door. I slipped off my boots with the heel of each, letting them drop to the ground as I watched him slip up his shirt. The moon coming through his window hit the pale surface of his six-pack.

Snapping out of it, I took off my black shirt and threw it to my left as I laid back for him to climb on top of me. He stopped halfway to slip off my skirt, tossing it behind him. He kissed his way through my stomach up to my chest where he stopped. I nodded. "Go."

He unclipped my green bra from the front, sucking on my right breast so harshly, his tongue playing with my nipple. I moaned, bringing my hands up to grip on his red hair.

After achieving to get moans out of me, he continued his way down with trails of wet kisses until he reached my underwear. "Come on!" I scowled, raising my hips to grant him access to slip down my underwear, leaving me naked except for my— "Socks stay on," he said, standing up to unbuckle his belt.

I balanced on my elbows and reached for a clear bottle on his nightstand. I drank from the bottle as I watched him tug his jeans down until he was bare and I was praying for my legs. I finished the bottle, throwing it on a pile of folded clothes on the ground.

He stopped between my legs, licking his way through all the wetness he had caused me. I inevitably moaned, bringing my hands back down to his hair, but he put his head up to crawl higher until he reached the level of my head. "Could eat you all day from how wet you are."

I furrowed my eyebrows, not saying anything as he buried himself in me. My mouth was wide open and a pain-filled expression grew on my face. It took me a minute to adjust, but once I did, the pleasure took over.

We were kissing as he thrusted into me, hitting the correct spots that triggered my moans. Everyone outside must've heard.

The rest was a blur. All I remember was fighting for dominance and how long the pleasure lasted. I remember him making sure I finished first and the name he called me by—love.