I am a monster

I woke up frantically, covered in sweat I couldn't believe the events that had unfolded last night.Our of nowhere I heard an abrupt thud swinging my heard around I gasped for air it couldn't be? Now I was convinced I had lost my mind "MUM!! I exclaimed in between screams your here your back I thought you'd never come back!" i said while still looking up in awe .I fought off my feeling for a moment and remembered how she had isolated me and left me stranded to figure out the world's cruel tricks by myself.The pain I felt every time I cried myself to sleep couldn't be erased just because she was here now.Snapping back into reality I pondered why after all this time ( which felt like more than an eternity to me) she had returned. My mother sensed my discomfort and stumbled back giving me some space.We just stood in silence locking eyes for a while until she finally spoke "I'm sorry for coming unnanounced, my God you've grown how are you? I know you'd be shocked but I was in town and had a business trip so I thought I'd pop in and see my beautiful little girl." Holding back tears I looked at the ground as emotions filled me I wanted to tell her so much but my mouth had other plans as these words escaped my lips "I'm not the same girl you left and you mean nothing to me you made that decision when you walked out that door four years ago" I said tooken aback with my own words.I saw my mothers discontent at this but I couldn't stay here right now after all that had happened this week .I ran not looking back until I was far enough that I couldn't hear the busy streets of London knowing my luck of course it had to be raining sighing I put my head into my knee and cried myself to asleep for want seemed like the millionth time this month.

Wondering about what's going on read on to find out all about Emily's traumatic past and her beacon of hope through it all.