1
Dear readers.
Before you continue, keep in mind, that this story will contain violence, profanity, explicit sex scenes, but also scenes of abuse and rape, although these scenes will not be explicitly written.
This is a story about a woman who has been kidnapped. She will find herself in unpleasant if not horrific situations a number of times in the story.
So..., if your okay with this, than, well..., enjoy!😁
Love, Wendy
Iris
Zzzzmmm, zzzzmmm, zzzzmmm...
"I'm coming, I'm coming, jeez, mrs Wilders, I'm no magician!"
The sound of her beeper drove Iris nuts tonight, you'd think it was a full moon or something. She had a cup of coffee when her shift started at 11, and now it was already 3.50. Damn, she needed to pee, so badly, she didn't even have time to go to the bathroom...
Halfway up to mrs Wilders room, Iris ran into mrs Mayflower.
"Ohhh, hello dear! Have you seen my cat? Her name is Molly..."
"Molly, where are you, come here you naughty cat..." mrs Mayflower, had Alzheimer's, and was now on her knees, in the hallway, looking for her cat, in her the middle of the night.
Strange, you might think? Nah..., not really, not if you're working at a small-scale psychogeriatric residential community.
"Let me help you mrs Mayflower..., you just get in bed, and I will search for Molly after I finished my round, okay?"
Mrs Mayflower gave me the brightest, toothless smile, and headed for her bed.
"Thank you, dear, you're a sweetheart!"
Before heading to mrs Wilder, Iris stopped at the mutual living, to pick up the stuffed cat mrs Mayflower was looking for.
20 minutes later, both ladies were taken care of, and she was finally able to take a break.
Walking down the hallway that lead to the kitchen, she noticed a falling star in the sky, and made a wish. Grinning by her herself, she resumed her way to the kitchen, it wasn't likely her wish would come true.
Having a husband, 3 teenagers, 2 dogs, 2 cats, and a recently widowed father, life was a little hectic and a break from her every day life wasn't something that was going to happen anywhere soon.
Iris sight, and just as she was about to enter the kitchen, a noise came from the other side of the door, instantly she froze. Who the hell could be inside? Then she remembered mrs Mayflowers earlier search for her cat, and grinned internally.
The old lady was probably looking for the bloody thing again and probably wandered into the kitchen by accident.
Iris snickered at her own jumpiness, maybe she should quit watching scary movies at her nightshifts, opened the door to the kitchen and took a step inside.
The place was dark, and the sound she heard before was gone.
"Mrs Mayflower? Mrs Mayflower, are you here?" Her smile faded, something was off.
The hairs on the back of her neck stood up and unconsciously she took a step back, but the moment Iris wanted to turn around, there was a movement on her left and before she was able to see what it was, there was a nasty sting in the back of her neck. Iris wanted to scream but the only thing that left her lips was a soft whisper and everything went black.
So..., if your okay with this, than, well..., enjoy!😁
Love, Wendy
Iris
Zzzzmmm, zzzzmmm, zzzzmmm...
"I'm coming, I'm coming, jeez, mrs Wilders, I'm no magician!"
The sound of her beeper drove Iris nuts tonight, you'd think it was a full moon or something. She had a cup of coffee when her shift started at 11, and now it was already 3.50. Damn, she needed to pee, so badly, she didn't even have time to go to the bathroom...
Halfway up to mrs Wilders room, Iris ran into mrs Mayflower.
"Ohhh, hello dear! Have you seen my cat? Her name is Molly..."
"Molly, where are you, come here you naughty cat..." mrs Mayflower, had Alzheimer's, and was now on her knees, in the hallway, looking for her cat, in her the middle of the night.
Strange, you might think? Nah..., not really, not if you're working at a small-scale psychogeriatric residential community.
"Let me help you mrs Mayflower..., you just get in bed, and I will search for Molly after I finished my round, okay?"
Mrs Mayflower gave me the brightest, toothless smile, and headed for her bed.
"Thank you, dear, you're a sweetheart!"
Before heading to mrs Wilder, Iris stopped at the mutual living, to pick up the stuffed cat mrs Mayflower was looking for.
20 minutes later, both ladies were taken care of, and she was finally able to take a break.
Walking down the hallway that lead to the kitchen, she noticed a falling star in the sky, and made a wish. Grinning by her herself, she resumed her way to the kitchen, it wasn't likely her wish would come true.
Having a husband, 3 teenagers, 2 dogs, 2 cats, and a recently widowed father, life was a little hectic and a break from her every day life wasn't something that was going to happen anywhere soon.
Iris sight, and just as she was about to enter the kitchen, a noise came from the other side of the door, instantly she froze. Who the hell could be inside? Then she remembered mrs Mayflowers earlier search for her cat, and grinned internally.
The old lady was probably looking for the bloody thing again and probably wandered into the kitchen by accident.
Iris snickered at her own jumpiness, maybe she should quit watching scary movies at her nightshifts, opened the door to the kitchen and took a step inside.
The place was dark, and the sound she heard before was gone.
"Mrs Mayflower? Mrs Mayflower, are you here?" Her smile faded, something was off.
The hairs on the back of her neck stood up and unconsciously she took a step back, but the moment Iris wanted to turn around, there was a movement on her left and before she was able to see what it was, there was a nasty sting in the back of her neck. Iris wanted to scream but the only thing that left her lips was a soft whisper and everything went black.
A good first chapter that draws the reader in. Good pacing leads to the end of the chapter where the future is left hanging. We see Iris, a harried working woman with obligations filling her life. The shooting star offers an opportunity for a fanciful wish. On the technical side, the convention is to capitalize ms., mrs. and similar titles. You are inconsistent in this regard. The sentence starting with the number 20, should have twenty spelling out. The other items are fairly minor and someone familiar with English could edit these in short order. A very good start.
Hi Wendy Gamelkoorn,
I recently went through your story "9.5 ft Full of Scars, A Yautja Fantasy Story" and I loved it so much. Your writing is amazing, and I kept thinking how cool it would look as a comic.
I loved the opening scene in Chapter 1 where Iris, working as a night-shift nurse, suddenly finds herself trapped in a small unfamiliar cell after wishing on a shooting star. The moment where she realizes she is no longer on Earth and senses danger all around is so intense and visually striking. It’s ideal for a comic adaptation as it blends suspense, mystery, and action perfectly.
I specialize in adapting stories into manga/comics, and I’d love to bring your story to life as a comic/manga. No pressure, though, I think your work would look awesome in comic form. If you’re interested in a paid collaboration, I’d love to discuss bringing your story to life visually.
If you’re interested, message me on Instagram (username: digitalstrokes_21) or DM me on DC (username: peterjones_90) so we can bring the story to life visually. I’ll be waiting to hear from you!
Regards
Peter.