The Cardinal Curse
There he was, wearing his Raiders jersey and standing in archway 108 of the lower level at the State Farm Stadium. I have got to be insane, I thought to myself and debated if I should find a different seat. I have never cheated on the Cardinals before and wasn’t sure if I was making the right move. I thought back to my other dates with Cardinal fans to remind myself that this just might be the way to get over my dating curse. My dates start strong, we always had so much in common and enjoyed each other’s company. We had our favorite date, watching Sunday Football, eating our standard finger foods. A smorgasbord of spinach dip, fruit bowl, cheese and crackers, and our all-time favorite the vegetable tray. Wait, did I just say vegetable tray! (that’s what we wanted the healthy people to think). For those foodies out there, our real spread was chicken wings, potato chips, and our all-time true favorite, the 7 layer bean dip. This continued all season long; until it didn’t. I can’t figure out where it went wrong. I mean, to be a Cardinals fan you have to be in it for the long haul. The team hasn’t made it easy for us, it is after all a heart attack team. I can’t imagine a true fan calling it quits; if they can hang on for a sports team they should have no reason to call it quits on a great relationship, right?
So get this, we are into the 5th week and the stats are 3-0. Looks promising, I thought, and mentioned to my then-boyfriend, “We’ve got this!“. No kidding, he gets up and walks out the door never to return. I’m looking around to see what might have caused him to leave knowing it can’t be because of my comment. I’m still convinced he had to have seen a ghost.
Always the optimist, I find another fan and start strong like the last one. Hold up, I’m not that type of girl -- I did wait a month in between as I was still really perplexed as to what happened to the last guy. Back to guy number two, the stats are now 3-6; not unexpected for my team. We were enjoying the game, the Cardinals were up by a touchdown and just as we were going into the 4th quarter I offered my then-boyfriend a drink. He asked me what kind and I told him I had some grape soda. All of a sudden he started crying and told me I just jinxed the game. “You can’t serve a purple drink while playing the Vikings!“. He hung his head low and walked out the door, never to be heard from again. I have to admit, it was a jinx as we didn’t score the rest of the game. Vikings for the win!
And let’s not forget about number three I do forget about him sometimes. He was pretty laid back and relaxed. Occasionally I had to ask him if he was alive as he would just sit and stare at the television. I would be up yelling and cheering on the team, like a fanatic and he would be as dull as a plastic knife. I have to admit, I let him go. I just wasn’t feeling it, I already had a wet blanket. It’s true, I had a wet blanket as I spilled my water all over myself.
Then came number four, I was sure he was going to be the one. He had it all, the jersey, ball cap, flag, phone case, blanket, pillow, and to seal the deal the socks. We were great together, never got bored with one another, and even loved each other’s families. I could see it now, one game day at his family and the next at mine. We both looked good in red and white which meant our kids were golden for Cardinal jerseys. We even survived the Cardinals not making it to the Super Bowl. This is promising, right? Wrong! The curse strikes again. I can’t even talk about this one, it is just too heartbreaking and I can’t relive it.
So here we are, at the stadium. My heart is racing and my brain is telling me to run. He looks normal enough, not like what I expected a Raiders fan to look like in person. No visible tattoos or piercings, not that those would deter me. I still couldn’t believe I was talked into this date. It was a dare from friends. They learned about this new dating app, NFL4Love, and thought it would work great for me but the catch was I had to pick someone from a different team. At first, I was resistant, no way could I even think about another team but then I figured why not. I wasn’t ready to jump into another failed relationship with a Cardinal fan. Eventually, I will get back to them but I might as well be a bit of a rebel and have some fun. This will be great, we will root for different teams and spar with each other for a few hours.
I was now starting to get excited about this adventure. I gave myself a pep talk, no really I was talking to myself while people around me were staring at me. I smiled and pointed to my ear as if I was talking to a Bluetooth so I wouldn’t look so crazy and have security called on me. I decided I had better go to the bathroom at this time to get a hold of myself. I splashed a little water on my face and headed back out the door to find my date still patiently standing there.
