Saving you

Rayleigh's

I suddenly wake up some of the voices that held me out from his long-time sleep and I realized I was in a hospital bed from the same time

WHERE I AM?!

I can't remember a bit for now since it's hazy and I felt dizzy, I can't get up for a while

But I know I was in the bed, lay in here, as I remember myself alone, same room quite a bit and peace once more I felt I was in my state of dying but no I am not dying today but to be awake a new life that I have.

Who knows what happen and I did realize that why am I here and why did I reborn into this person

And I know this old owner was dead along with my own body, I sigh

I was thinking why?

This poor soul. Why do you want to die?

What is the reason, son? (Talking to the air and no response)

Here am I wake up to this place, the future I mean, 10years after time in this boy without memory at all about this person that I cope in, I was aware too well but I just don't want to sink it to me since I don't to be scared and terrified not yet

I just thinking about what to do so I lay there for a while, I don't need to be panic, I need to think

Breath in

Breath out

It's ache again in my head like it's almost cracked my skull

It's hurt

But I need to get up and turn to look aside and see my face since there was a mirror in my side.

The heck?!

Who this being be?

who is this kid?

A girl?

I looked at myself and touch my chest at it seem flat and I noticed that thing down there.

I frown a lady like a boy

So I did reborn to someone else in this state

When I stay here my feeling and pain of memories come back.

My memories from the past myself lay in the bed and hopeless

The feeling of loneliness and painful realization that no one wouldn't go to visit you from his last life under his death

My home and my family was not mine anymore

The family that I grew up with was not with me anymore and I can't call mine since I give up them before my death

Since my death limited for me to do the right thing, and it's too late to regret since that was the life I choose (no, fate chose this for me bar and death like this)

Even I ended like that alone but still, I have something I did before I died to save someone life since this young one who been sick since he was a baby and now I guess he was alive and healthy, and while me, I did die but I was given a second chance to be alive and do a right thing and live a peaceful life he wishes before he dead

The death was not a scary thing to accept, only to have regrets about this without resolving on it, you can't fix it

Memories of the regrets I have been still in there that been bothered me, the voices of the people who begged to their lives and voices while cursing me to death,

But here I am now alive and still breathing that's why I felt blessed and also felt disgusted my self since I think I don't deserve this,

I looked at this boy, this beautiful young man with green eyes starting back

'I don't know why you end like this, but I assured you you'll live as best as you wanted to'

I just sigh

I honestly don't know what to do, and I just stare at the open window, thinking what this world became this time since I remember it's been 10 years since I did

I was just 35 years old, with diagnoses, was cancers

I don't know what to do?

I felt this feeling of unsure since I was always sure what I would do, every decision always have an answer but now I didn't know

who knows what my life will be like.

While I was thinking deeply into it, suddenly the door opened and saw this two old couple with teary eyes

(I think this boy's grandparents).

"Oh, my Lil ash. you're awake," Grandma said in her teary eyes when they saw me, while me staring at me since I didn't know them so

I don't know how to react.

It seem these two felt my discomfort so they held to themself and I see their sadness in their faces so I felt guilty to hurt them through my action, It was new to me as Rayle who been never had a family since

I just live my own and make my name when I was still alive.

As Rayleigh, It's new to me, and I tried to reach out to them and I did

"I am sorry, Grandma," I say in a timid tone

(I shocked myself since I did not speak like this).

The two look at me with shock and soften.

"It's okay, Ash we don't blame you, your grandma and I were glad that you are safe," my Grandpa said.

Then the doctor came in and speak with them then to me

so He just nod and said

"I see, he has amnesia, since its a serious one, its whole memory of his, still he didn't gain to remember, so it's hard to get it back, " He said.

"Can He still remember Doc?" asked Grandpa

"In this case, it depends on the patient to gain their memories but to me, it's hard to gain the memories back after that accident, He bangs His head pretty good," the doctor said, slowly " I am sorry sir ma'am."

The two elders didn't believe and they became emotional, that's why theme didn't bear to see them like this since my guilt became increased since I know I am not their grandson, I never remember them at all (maybe not now) The doctor said I stay here for a bit for examining in 3 days after that I can discharge.

"It's okay, son if you have No memory about us, the important was you awake and alive," my grandma said, hugging me and my Grandpa just tap my shoulder as an agreement

I just let them hug me

I just sigh

I don't know what to do, at least I will be their grandson for a while (To ease my guilt that has been eaten me slowly day by day).