SACRED

My name is Maze Green and this is my story. I don't know what to call it but it's definitely not a love story, at least not yet. I hope.

Ok from the beginning, I happened to be one of the lucky ones who find their mates early, I didn't have to look too hard because he was my best friend Xander Stevens, Alpha of Bluewater pack. I had always secretly wished he was my mate since I had a huge crush on him since I was 5, so as fate would have it, I got my wish.

He loved me and I loved him more than anything in the world, he would do anything for me. He would gladly lay down his life for me, and I was the luckiest to have him as my mate.

He is a fair and just Alpha of my pack and with me by his side we were unstoppable. We have won every battle we led together and have continued to succeed. To cut the long story short, he was my everything and I was his.

But, you can't have it all now can you? Even though we could do almost everything for each other and together, there was one thing we couldn't do together and that was one of the biggest things in our wolf relationship. SEX!

Even though I am marked, out mate bond is not fully complete. We couldn't have sex, now this isn't because I didn't want to get fucked because trust me I really do. But this was bigger than me or my sexual desires. This was about the werewolf race and my role in making sure we live longer in good health.

I am what you call a sacred wolf, the purest of werewolves. There have only been 5 sacred wolves in the last 500 years and I happen to be one of them. Yay me! (note the sarcasm). Our blood not only heals wolves, but also heals every living being of every illness known to ever exist. Our blood varies depending on the host.

To be able to heal all living being, you have to be clean. Nothing goes into your body and the only thing that should come out is blood. Which mean bye bye kids for me, wait what am I even talking about? I can't have sex! So no kids anyways.

Moving on, the cleaner the host the more powerful the blood. My parent tells me not to be selfish, that's the least I could do for the society. Help them live longer and be stronger while I am miserable. I have read every book known to wolves, just to find a loophole but nothing.

Isn't it cruel that the moon goddess assigns you a mate knowing fully well you can't fully be bonded to the person? You crave every bit of the person but can't do shit about it? Well I must have been hitler in my old life to be given this kind of fate.

2 months ago was Xander's and I 3 years anniversary and he arranged a romantic dinner for two on the rooftop of the pack house. At the beginning of the relationship, he never pressured me once about sex, he knew what he was in for. But as the years go by, even though he would never ask, I have noticed changes in him. Our kisses lasted about 20 seconds before but now it last way longer than 20 seconds, his hands linger longer than usual. He needs more, he is an Alpha so it's understandable. They are more possessive in nature and want heirs right away. Knowing I would never be able to provide him with that kills me everyday.

After the dinner as usual he would pick me up and run all the way to the pack stream, strip us both down and go skinny dipping. It was the perfect night. After swimming, we ended up falling asleep under the tree.

We woke up to stick poking at us and kids laughing, we were covered up so they didn't really know who was underneath the blanket. Xander groaned and the laughing halted, he came face to face with the kids and made noises that made them start laughing again. He stood up and started chasing them. He was great with kids, he loved every kid in the pack and they all adored him. He would make a great father. That was when I got the craziest idea I wish I could take back. This was the moment my life no longer became bearable.

When we got back to the pack, I called Xander to our room. He had a kid with him "Run along, the Luna needs me to eat her face" Xander whispered to the kid which made him scrunch up his face in disgust and ran away.

"Don't say that to kids they would get the wrong idea" I told him shoving his shoulder playfully.

"Ok what's up?" He said pulling me closer to him

We needed to talk more about this, I know he says and acts like everything is ok, but I know better "You really want kids don't you?"

"Don't ask me that Maze, we already talked about this. I am fine the way we are." gosh I love him so much

I pull away from him "You say that now, but we both know this is going to be a big problem in the future. I won't let you be miserable just because I can't give you what you want Xan"

"But I already have all I want, YOU" He took a step forward trying to pull me back to him but I don't move "I know that but you are the Alpha of this pack and in order for this peaceful reign to continue, you need to produce an heir otherwise you would have an uprising" he looked at me knowing fully well I was right.

"I know that Mazy, but unless you suddenly decided that you want to be tainted and have your powers taken away, there isn't much I can do about that"

He was getting irritated now "I will continue to fight everyone and every pack who tries to take what belongs to me." He growled, his wolf was on the surface now.

I wish I could decide that, but what kind of person would that make me? Putting my desires over the well-being of the pack and the wolf race.

I took his face in my hands and calmed him down. I sat down on the bed and he was kneeling in front of me, I bent a little and kissed him on the lip. He smiled and that was

when I said the statement that changed my life forever

"I give you permission to conceive an heir with another"