A Mediums Dream

A Mediums dream.

New York City. Those three words always impressed me...until I actually went there. My God! What a mess! Only joking, but seriously, what a bizarrely normal almost human-like suburban oasis of homesteads verses geography and political endeavour, religious coagulation, rules and regulations and also modernity.

A strange place indeed for the intrepid explorer, almost expected to join in with the street people just to gain respect from long-suffering rebellious souls caught in the crossfire.

The sound of a new-world ambulance passes me by whilst contemplating the need for psychic conversations I’m almost forced to have with the spirits of dead junkie’s residual energies. Too heavy? Ok, people in the spirit-world. Dudes of the great afterlife, almost Angels themselves now that they’re free of the restrictions gravity brings to our temple, The body.

Sitting inside warm and cosy pondering a nice warm job working for students from middleclass homes I know that that Ambulance is going into a ghetto apartment and that I can’t help thinking my place is with the people in need. It’s my calling to hear the repressed, that’s all I do when I’m being repressed, call out for help.

What to do with my life...what to do? Well it’s off home to Ireland and back into the cold dark apartment I call home in the year of 2004. Bang! A few years later and all the hard work is paying off and it’s off to London we go to visit family.

The first place I visit, Belvedere Square Spiritualist Church. The beginning of the end I call it, after what seems like an eternity here we are in the original place of worship, 33 Belvedere Square London. First night in a Mediums meeting, listening to her as she spells it out for the rest of us. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s portrait up on the wall staring proudly down at me, Thinking God this is it, after all this waiting a change has come and what lessons I have learned in my solitude are making sense now.

There is a little fairy-druid beneath the mediums chair, arms outstretched, blessing us all. I’m thinking was there ever an oak tree above him, where he stands, when druids ruled the land, and my own of course being born in Ireland. What they called the Goddess, Erin, what England was called I have yet to find out but similar I would say in some way.

Anyway little fairy spirit looking at me as proud as punch and all I can see now is how this land looked like thousands of years ago, while the medium speaks to me, of my father and his love of horses, the smell of horses enters the room and I’m there with her, pretty sure others also remember their connections to horses through the memory of aroma, and their love of nature.

There is a mediumship class on in the other room and I’m sure that I will start going there soon. I had a quick peek in and the light around the teachers head was astoundingly bright when he looked at me in passing, smiling that all knowing smile of “Hello, we recognise you; good to be in the here and now isn’t it?” Rhetorically. Small beginnings lead to greater things I’m thinking. They have a newsletter in the foyer, “Psychic news” and low and behold it’s full of W.B Yeats stuff along with Maud Gonne and some interesting articles about their lives and interests in revolution, strange to find this Irish freedom fighters stuff, in the middle of London.

Things have changed, yet here we are a new millennium, same ol same old some of the time. Two full pages or more saying that W.B was a spiritualist enthusiast and a founding member of the Golden Dawn, an organisation or collective of magicians and spiritualists very famous in its day and quite influential over world developments in mediumship and other spiritualist circles.

An Irishman at the wheel, gives me some hope “o” fame and fortune myself after all some of us are born with the light and must follow that star before it passes by.

Just passing my fortieth year and its true life has begun! With a bang it feels after a very shaky decade ever since the year two- thousand things have been rocky at the best of times. Spiritually speaking being a working medium myself there was many a strange sight, where before there were few. Still that is why I’m writing this book, to give an insight for other sensitive’s to see there’s nothing wrong with being right and nothing wrong with being a seer.

Most others I have met that have still to share space and time with spiritualists are also without a paddle. Ireland has little or nothing to offer locally to young aspiring mediums compared to England which is full of churches in each and every town. Here in the south it’s unheard of (Illegal) and this country is crying out for mental and spiritual health. Celtic countries have a natural collective consciousness and it calls for discipline as far as energies are concerned. Leaving all to chance allows for nasty elements to affect us and creates negative psychological thinking patterns to emerge.

The higher angels of our psyche are the only true source of divine countenance we have as human beings. There will always be a battle between good and evil, however grey it becomes, it’s part of our nature. Although I have noticed that people who say it’s not all black and white are pretty grey themselves, turning out to be victims of addiction and self abuse with nothing much to say or do for the benefit of others.

Still, even the greatest critics become the firmest believers when given the right attention. Like you the reader, hello by the way my name if you don’t already know is Brian, this book is for you and whomever is with you in spirit or body (lucky you) I hope it appeals to adepts and novices alike. After years of part-time palmistry, mostly self taught, I began to develop natural mediumship gifts.

When reading palms I started to see ancestral faces coming out of people’s hands. Smiling dead grandmothers and grandfathers telling me that they loved their families and to tell them they where allright. The first time I saw a face it was when I had gone to visit some friends in Zurich in Switzerland. I was staying in a large wooden House that appeared to have a very strong presence of a young girl in my bedroom.

Being only twenty-four at the time and having very little experience with ghosts, I quickly started up a good report with her and one night I awoke to see a rainbow of light in front of my face as bright as could be, I yelled in fright and passed my hand through it. Looking back now as I write this it feels that this is where it all began. The next night as I walked into her room, as I now called it, I could see a young girl choking in spasm on my bed. I knew it was her apparition, I felt a lot of love for her at that moment and still twenty years on can feel her presence with me like a special friend watching over me, waiting for my turn to enter into the spirit world.

The next day as I was reading palms in the festival spectacle in Zurich I started to see faces of people in the punters hands, it must have been something to do with my experiences in the house. The house itself had become a kind of training-ground for mediumship as each night something else would occur.

One night a parish priest from Ireland, father Des, an expert in ghosts himself came to me in a dream. He had his back to me and as I tapped his shoulder he turned around but his face was dead and his message was clear, beware of what you are getting into, its dangerous and frightening, you aren’t ready for such things yet, go slow. I thought at the time that he just didn’t want me to develop my gifts and that it was catholic fear mongering, but I decided to play it safe and not to open up too much to scarier apparitions, which there where, it turned out.

Even years later I remember his advice and I always fight against negative or menacing spirits if they try to get too familiar or aggressive rather than open up and let them in.

So I suppose this journey has been slowly developing over this very issue, length of time and experiences. It makes more sense now being capable and ready to help others, under supervision from spiritualist churches and their profound ability to support people from great distances. Anyway, as I was saying, first experiences being very unique, help to mould us mediums to a particular thread. It’s as if the spirits or ghosts are employed to help us to help them, or remind us that if we’re not careful, we could end up needing a medium to help us towards the light someday. Not to scare you, but some spirits don’t seem to want help and are inclined to hinder other spirits from being at peace, or from moving to a higher plane.

Another evening I was lying in bed and suddenly the wind picked up out of nowhere, slamming the shutters off the windows near one of my friends, Anushka, as she was asleep downstairs. I could feel she was awake so I called down “don’t worry, it’s just the wind!”

She later told me that she had been reading a book on poltergeists and had just turned to the chapter on wind making doors slam e.t.c.. and the shutter doors at her window slammed off the wall putting her into a panic. Then hearing me shout from upstairs not to worry, I think she hid under the covers that night, we had a good laugh at that one.

Anushka and her husband Rob, a good friend of mine from Ireland, had a daughter called Nicky, she had also some awareness of a spirit in the living room area and would always hide behind the couch staring at the corner opposite.

There was a plant there covered in shrunken balloons, Anushka had said that whenever the children had placed balloons there they would always be shrunken in the mourning yet not anywhere else in the house. Some children are affected by spirits more than others, I think this ghost just wanted to communicate and was less afraid of the children than he was of us. Some part of me thinks that Nicky enjoyed the first inklings of awareness herself and wanted to play with the ghost but was too nervous and was probably right in being so.

Altogether my time in Zurich had been an education and also an informative introduction to the laws of chance and destiny. It’s not that we are born to go places it’s that we choose to do so. Choosing to write and travel immediately forges a connection with the other people that have realised the bigger world is out there and one fine day the minds of others find their way into our little world making our destiny mingle with theirs.

For instance the plot of James Joyce, I accidentally stumbled across on my birthday whilst visiting Zurich Zoo. He being buried in Zurich cemetery (not in the zoo obviously) beside his grave probably the greatest statue of him there is. Atmospherically enhancing my experience of this place and introducing his world into my own. Calling out to the muse within that here be mystery and love, the love of a welcoming place where dreams come true and the fruits of labour are realised. No there were no voices coming from the abyss, just the inkling of change and the thirst to create.

Since then Mr Joyce has reappeared in my life in many ways, I moved into a house in Dublin directly across the road from one of the places where he lived. This house had been haunted by two men that where killed by a jealous lover that buried them both in the back garden. My first night in that house was the most bizarre adventure I have ever experienced with one of the men entering my body and jumping out of it again and again right in front of my eyes! I could feel an energy leaving my lower-back like a rocket and pouring up to the ceiling energising me like nothing I have ever experienced. I bet you’d love to visit that house eh?

Then again in Dublin, on Parnell Street Mr Joyce had a house behind mine which is now his main museum in Dublin. A great place to visit on the old Victorian map he had drawn up, gives you a perspective on his world, a world readily available to aspiring spiritualists.

Dublin is coming down with the friendliest Viking Spirits, very willing and able to manifest, day and night, left, right and centre, among others. Nearly every street is a graveyard of sorts and where houses are built on them spirits will rise by the many I assure you. They’re called Funeral paths, from where funerals used to pass through on old roads or to the graveyards or where leylines cross or pass, or where underground streams flow e.t.c.

So James Joyce had become a mentor from the other side I suppose. Again in Galway where Nora had become his wife I had also taken a nice little place in the year two-thousand just around the corner from her house near the famous Nicholas cathedral where Cromwell had housed his horses after destroying the statues inside on the day his forces where let into Galway without any warfare due to the size of his army. Also, had met a beautiful young European lady and courted her a few doors down from Nora’s home.

I would like to think that Mr. Joyce is here with me now and as I write this I can feel the temperature dropping. There is also a graceful presence of his wonderful daughter Lucia and a glowing mist with the sounds of her illustrious life as an artist and dancer. She is a kind of saint for many of us who are graced by her presence. Yes indeed the “Mystic Isle” is coming to life again for those of us that have the place for it in our spiritual will or ambition. This land of ours is still a school for thought, this Earth in fact for all the world still has its poets and charmed angels, its royalty and warriors alike out there in here with us when were lucky enough to be blessed with their presence. That for me is the best gift in the entire World to have the after-life proven on such a large scale each day with only the true believers to walk beside. With great knowledge comes great responsibility, we are told and it rings true for mediumship.

Having a heightened sense brings with it many tasks and struggles. A lot of people find the presence of supernatural things makes them jittery and mischievous, also aggressive and troublesome, as if whatever restless spirit is about is affecting them and controlling their personalities.

This is where being a healer rings true as I find mischievous or negative people become manically paranoid or threatening around me and it takes a lot of energy to deal with their particular situations. Sometimes a blessing works a treat other times you have to hold their hand and watch them like a tantrum throwing toddler.

Of course warning negative people works wonders sometimes where applicable, seeing their futures in the mind’s eye regarding the consequence of their behaviour and whispering it back to them over the airwaves can do the trick, but most of the time it’s just babysitting imbeciles and no-one likes an imbecile.

For one reason or the other spirits affect the living in different ways, for example where there has been a murder or suicide or car crash there will always be some residual energy or even the spirit themselves affecting the actions and thoughts of the living. Its easy to get caught up in the goings on but after some trial and error, dealing with energies gets easier as time progresses. Progress is the only word here that brings sanity to the life of a sensitive spiritual person. Standing back sometimes to assess a given scenario helps and asking for help mentally from angels or even the people around you is good when confusion gets a grip stress always follows, its contagious.

The spirits that cause stress get excited when they elevate energy and breathing deeply seems to cure us of their influence. As I write this I can hear someone outside and their voice immediately stopped my breathing and caused me to panic a little, only by calming myself down can I look through my mind’s eye and ask “let me see” to view the spirit of this person and figure out what’s going on and what to do. Jealousy is normally the first reason as in this case that causes a soul to go into attack mode. Fear of being spotted and having their minds read and all their insecurities brought out for all to see subconsciously.

Of course this will usually never happen; I would stop someone from abusing another person to the best of my ability when this happens. Ego battles never cease that’s why it’s important for us sensitive’s to be chaste and pure of heart mind and body. I know for the aspiring mystics out there it’s horrifying to be celibate and good but believe me many the psychic has lost their marbles because of the consequences of over indulgence, or theses days, any indulgence whatsoever, eh?

Also the karma involved with being with another person is great because of the energies we associate with and the spiritual existence we have chosen. I bet you weren’t thinking of that when you picked up your Tarot card for the first time or stared into a crystal ball but believe me, much of the time I have wished that I could juggle lovemaking with spirituality and have found only terrible sacrifices had to be made if it was off to the pearly Gates for me. Sacrifice or poltergeist, the choice is yours.

Yes it’s extreme but that’s the price some of us have to pay for dabbling in things we don’t understand. How would you like to be Alice in Wonderland and never get to leave? Mental asylums are full of our greatest angels, most of you will experience times of testing and unscrupulous idiots gambling with their souls as well as our own.

This is why I think Father Des came to me on the astral plane originally to warn me of the sacrifices involved and the consequence of failure, also because he is a catholic priest, he is completely ignorant to spirits true needs, their rules and how to clear them. Many people mistakenly ask priests to clear their homes of spirits, it lasts about a day, then returns to haunted status. It takes more then a little holy water, prayers and the power of Christ!

Believe me, I have tried, for decades to ask Christ to clear homes to absolutely no affect, whatsoever. I have seen Jesus perform miracles, just never with spirits. Still no quest is without pitfalls and no prise worth the taking without struggle and pain. If you meet anyone that says otherwise it’s because their young and living on very thin ice. So horror stories over? Yes for the time being after all were trying to send a positive message here at least for the moment.

There are people that can manage to be cosmic lovers and still hold on to their sanity whilst opening their minds to delicate and complicated procedures. Nearly all of these people are hard workers and usually end up damaging everyone they come into contact with one way or the other, but still not purposefully. The cosmic fool is a bit of a joker sometimes so trial and error is the only way we learn, all of us here on the earthly plane. Leaving our experiences to become our workbooks when helping others.

All healing and spiritual healing is based on the same principals, that our bodies need love and loving others is the only way an adult gets love most of the time.

The more mature we are the more we care for others, the more exiting it becomes when we can visit people in spirit and keep them company although in earnest it’s important not to tell the wrong people in case of violent reactions and name calling (Remember the witch burnings)

A reputation is for a lifetime so I’m told an overzealous jealous mouths can and have ruined lives.

There are many homeopathic remedies for supposed paranoid states in fact you could write a book on them, still there is a truth believe it or not that what we think about others thoughts can and will change them. I have noticed through listening to the voices in my own head for example what someone might be thinking about me as they rattle dishes in the kitchen or bang pots as if in some kind of a conspiracy with my inner critic.

It’s not easy to figure out at first if my thoughts are either being heard by the listener, or if it’s my imagination, but one thing’s for sure the timing of each thought coincides with the reaction of supposed listener. Do they themselves have psychic abilities are they sensitive and if so are they more responsive to negative spirits messages, yes, is usually the case in undisciplined or wounded people. As if the thoughts I am receiving are causing discomfort which my own inner critic is sending them about someone who pushes my buttons. I hope I’m not confusing you too much. You see ever since the millennium people’s sensitivities have exploded and as most people have no outlet by which to develop new gifts, they just accept them as the norm and are led by the nose as if nothing they do or say is wrong, while experienced people know how much work the undisciplined mind can be.

The only solution to reactionary emotional terrorism is prayer or gentle emotional coaxing even buttering their egos until whatever is bothering them can be moved on or dealt with. Like guinea pigs with helmets on.

Life challenging little battles are the making of a good healer, learning to remove the obstacles other people put in our way. Wounded people, victims of abuse that are conditioned by “bad elements” to basically bully the rest of us, if they can get away with it. The meaning of life in many ways balances on dealing with the seven deadly sins and the immaturity of those that abuse the cardinal rule, do what they wilt, and it harm none, make it so.

I have found myself thinking other peoples thoughts for them and by doing so gently tried to nurse little hints of positivity in thought the babbling of their inner critic like, maybe you’re not so bad slow down a little you’re overcompensating. Or for the really childish ones they think you’re super intelligent take it easy on them they couldn’t possibly know how special and compassionate you are.

Sometimes, not all the time, it pays of simply because I have created a whole new world in my head about them that I have hypnotised myself into always being nice to nasty people no matter how adept they are at pushing my buttons.

Still the dove has claws and needs to use them when attacked. There’s no point in lying there if you know that you’re going to be assaulted, the power of the mind can achieve great things over evil acts and ignorant people when needed, don’t forget negative things rarely happen when you’re sharp and ready for anything.

Remember , negative energy moves anti-clockwise, positive, clockwise. There are always situations that spring from nowhere so a lot of my time is spent seeing the future and changing it having a conscious awareness has come in very handy when rein-acting future situations you have rehearsed for. Try it yourself if you don’t already, just visualise the people you might meet later on this evening or further on in the week, year or decade.

Open your heart and mind and visualise their faces what they may be doing or trying to do and how they feel when they mistreat you or even manhandle you even as it is usually in spirit. Asking continuously why are they doing this to you and make sure you get an answer, hear the answers coming to you, ask for help to understand their reasons and motives for attacking you verbally and emotionally and you will eventually gain in knowledge and emotional support. Possibly its work better if you see yourself helping others, the universal angst is way stronger when cry freedom is announced and human rights are at stake.

The battle continues both in microcosm and macrocosm. For those of us that choose to shine or are chosen don’t forget all negative energy is a cry for help, from the bullies insecurities and fear of our powers to the genocidal maniacs fear of losing control over their countries. You see, becoming psychic means affecting not only our world but the world of others, wise men do hide it is said, for the horror that roams at day is greater than its vessels, wounded souls, lost souls and purposefully sadistic individuals. Unbeknown to themselves usually their ignorant dysfunctional personalities end up controlling the rest of us leading us to control them as much as is feasible.

For example, first world countries policing and warning other less sophisticated dictatorships e.t.c. to avoid genocide amongst other explosive situations (no pun intended)

Many psychics end up becoming police-like themselves and are shunned by the many, so are feared and rightly so by dangerous meddlers testing their own limitations. I have seen much in my lifetime regarding political struggles in certain circles and hay! Here I am writing a book about it. (Mostly the personal politics of families and their transference of their problems to others)There is solution in catastrophe.

We can reverse evil and “live” our lives to the amusement of our peers, after all I have no hang-ups as long as your morals are up to check, I have every intention of helping the very people that have tried to subconsciously kill me and ruin my work because of the threat I pose to their choice to be lethargic or to follow the “dreamers need superior reality” delusions they have. They have been the most exiting experiences I have ever had. They have tested my limitations and have only come a cropper themselves.

Some days when I have just finally overcome everything some spiteful individual has thrown at me, I feel more alive than god himself! Than any goddess, any volcano, any mountain, or thunderbolt, by Christ! It feels great beating the best and pitying nothing because now I feel responsible for their futures, as if like lost sheep their weapons represent failure and their failure means that everything I stand for must now be set upon them. The amount of times former enemies have returned to me preaching God is love or, I belief in Buddha or, even sometimes, apologising in their own way, sometimes even verbally apologising, sometimes in death and the great relief their vacancy leaves behind brings peace not only to others but to the people that had wounded them originally.

Forgive me if this is too raw and rough edged but that’s how I like it. None of us are designed to suffer assault in the form of insult, that’s the lazy way out of fear. Racism is the lazy mans sword, it has power all of its own, its controls others and vexes them but it also disempowers people until they eventually react, sometimes with violence and guerrilla terrorism, sometimes with prayer and peaceful protest.

The Devil hates peaceful protest and a lot of the time this is how great things happen, Northern Ireland ,Indian, African American human rights marches among many others ended up in the slaughter of innocent. Especially in India, Ghandi was in many ways responsible for the death and mauling of many the pacifist that supported him. Why all the politics? Life is politics, the Dali Lama has said himself where many a Buddhist monk has fallen without raising a hand in anger but I’m sure did in defence.

But I’m not political you might say. Are you not? Better think again, and think long my friend. Can you remember the day you decided to abstain from something? Was this the day you found yourself rejecting others, even those closest to you, drugs ecstasy, hashish, or alcohol or became a vegetarian. I can remember when I gave up meat my local butcher started a very personal argument and nearly barred me from the only accessible shop locally (attempted boycotting)

The same with my lifelong friends when I gave up hashish and alcohol, on the same night one of them offered me ecstasy. I took one look at them partying away new years eve and realised I had become someone else, someone with a conscience and then I became angry, it was my political expression to them that we were better than this and just a few years older than the young people around us.

You know nearly everyone at that party has been affected coincidentally by drug and alcohol abuse. At least three people have had nervous breakdowns from ecstasy alone on of them died of heart failure brought on by it (heart condition) another nearly choked on his own vomit like his idol Jimmy Hendrix. This last guy had once given a young teenager some poteen (moonshine) symbolically on the brow of a bridge which afterwards she had fallen off, twenty feet below into freezing water and had been forgotten about by her supposed lifelong friends for two hours only to end up stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of her life. I could go on but I started to realise that karma is an exact science and what we do comes round, believe me, nothing will stop it but love, charity and responsibility.

Years later I realised tat these parties escalated and one night a DJ was killed when the car he was travelling in hit a wall, they drove him home to try to sober up first, but by the time they drove the 25 miles past the hospital to their house, he was dead. The karma for this was that one of my closest friends from school was killed in the same area by driving into a wall on the way back from one of these parties(also a DJ) another DJ friend faced the same fate , after leaving a party to drive to Dublin and smashed into a tree. Another one was killed on the road by a truck smashing into him as he was parked. That’s four DJs altogether.

Looking back I realise that there was a hunger for change in a world that offered little choice, I began to see a pattern emerging. Whenever someone affected my life it was as if they where introducing changes that would otherwise never have happened or happened to a lesser degree. The supposed losers and outcasts of society they themselves having great potential, had rejected fame and the pressures it brings, to rebel against society or parents or their peers or the lovelessness that being elevated above others brings until you begin to see the light (no pun intended).

The fear of flying, the fear of showing others to be failures as if by rejecting success you were choosing the glory of non-ego. That you were the everyman and that we were all equal then as an oxymoron-moron turning on people that embraced their gifts and calling them vain and greedy or self-serving, when that’s what they themselves had become. Self serving victims of the pressures of fame and success, turning to addiction and self-centred self importance.

Some of the greatest artists of this world speak through their perfectionism others fall into hell for the joys it brings to the body and all the illusions of a full life brought about by peer pressure and fear, hallucinogenics and indulgence. Don’t forget, the greatest drug of all, anxiety. Ask yourself this about yourself and be honest, what would I do without my crutches?

Bam! Were back coz I’m going to tell you what, what some of us do is face the darkness and breathe, easy baby. Let it flow, embrace the new day and all the promises bestowed upon you, keeping it real of course, after all reality is where it’s at. Real dreams coming true it’s inevitable, it’s all happening and hey it’s already happened ,if you’re open to the visualisations given to you. With small changes your life can change for the better and before hard times or good, you can take both in your stride.