die trying

Beads of sweat loomed on the brow, rolling down his face like raindrops that trickle down the waxy surface of a leaf after stalling the drop from an edge. How long had it been, crouching in the same position? How long had it been, being in the cold this way? The silence was so thick it could be cut right in the air. It’s strange how humanity works. In dangers and situations in which brother is put up against his brother. Humanity seems to be losing its grasp on unity now bending towards sectionalizing themselves, creating boundaries that should not be crossed. No longer was there pity put towards humans, instead it was the commonality that we created that put one with the other and the rest against.

"Even Adam and Eve would never have thought that this might befall their children“, he thought crouching the uncomfortable position, looking dead ahead.

Time seems to have stopped in this part of the world or was it that circumstances had stretched situations so far, that time stretched along with it. Time, it was an enemy, it was a friend, it was a hypocrite. He stood motionless sitting, waiting, and cursing time. How long has it been out here? When was the last time a smile crept on to his face? It seemed that along with everything else this emotion was erasing as each second passed.

Tribal instincts were taking over, being here for so long. How many more days more, how long until breathing was no longer something to worry about? Warmth hadn’t been felt like it should have. It seemed just yesterday that he was lying on green grass absorbing the sun feeling so young. And now, that same sun was an annoyance, too hot, too dry, and too bright. It had been so long he thought, days had stretched into weeks, and weeks extended into months. Those months were long and hard. How much longer, would today be the final day or will it stretch to tomorrow? It was either one or the other. There were no rules, no jurisdictions, just survival. How long would it be until he walked No Man’s Land? By the looks of it, he was already in it, the very pits of hell. Here it was either do or die.

Do or die...

She was slowly tracing her small slender fingers over the bare skin that rested beneath her. Tracing over the muscles that were so broad making cuts into the skin. Each cut a different story, a different time far away from where they were now. She kissed the parts that left traces with her finger, winging over the arms and making their way to the chest. He lay beneath her watching with anticipation and sheer awe. Her touch was warm and welcoming leaving him undone with each tickle on the skin. There had been many fingers that had brushed against his skin, so many of them slender and thin, each with their own unique beauty. But never had they reverberated the emotions that this finger was putting through. A sweet assault he thought to himself. He watched her finger slowly move around him, playing with every single pore on his skin. How could it be possible that this girl, with her feeble tiny frame, made this mammoth to melt away? The finger tracing had slowly stopped and now the assault tactic changed to soft feathered kisses. They started from the wrists working their way up to the nape of his neck. He gasped with each feathered touch. It was so soft that it could barely be felt, and yet they sent sensations of huge electrical currents surging through his body with each feel. She kissed slowly his cheekbone, nuzzling it with her nose, warmth emanating from her every move. How is this possible, that someone so strong and soulless like him could feel this touch? Was it possible that he can feel again?

“What have you done to me, you sorceress, what is it that you have, what magic do you possess to have such a hold or me?” he asked her, moaning from beneath her touch.

She looked at him now, cradling his face in her hands, smiling down on him. That smile, oh yes, that smile he always ached for, that smile that made him melt. He looked at it, tracing the lips of that smile with his index finger. The corners that turned upwards slightly, rose color that fled across her lips, this smile give him death and re-birth every time he saw it. His question still loomed in the air waiting for an answer.

But it was always the same question, followed by the same answer she always gave, “you have the real magic”, she said kissing with more passion on his cheeks. He moaned with the warmth that found its way beneath his skin. The moans excited her, she lifted from her side and came over him. Looking down at him she smiled again, and again he melted beneath her. She slowly crept towards his face, her breath tingled his lips, and they were screaming a silent scream, screaming from want and desire. Never had he felt like this with any other women. She seemed to possess some sort of charm that tamed this rogue lion. There was no way any women could make a man do as what she did to him. With her small stature and ultra-feminine self, she made this brute man fall to his knees, ready to do as she bid. He was like a happy slave to her, ready to die at her one word. When he was drifting through these thoughts he came back to reality as her lips touched his. This time with fiery fury, passion burned from her lips to his, and he was lost. Lost in another dimension a different universe altogether. She kissed him long and hard on the very part of him that wanted it so much. This was it, the moment that he always wants to live over and over again. And just like that, she pulled back from her hold gazing down at him. He was aching for more, the passion souring inside him, alerting every atom of his being. This one kiss was not enough, he wanted more, much more. With all the energy trembling inside of him, he held on to her arms with both hands firmly and pulled her down and over. This time she was beneath him. He stared into the very pools of honey staring back at him. What was this creature he thought, she can’t b human, she was too angelic to be so?

He took in a deep breath, kissing her face so lightly as to not damage the beauty she possessed. But no longer could the passion be controlled. It was spreading like wildfire all over his body, raging within.

“Please, please let me have you, let me...“, he groaned as the wave washed over him.

She smiled a mischievous smile from below, asking him, “what more do you want, I am yours”. How could she not see? She was coy and sly, acting very innocent at a moment so filled with frenzy.

“Let me taste you, let me be your soul, I want you...inside of me, right now, please”, he panted weary of the blood surging through his veins, they made the thumping of his heart so much faster, she was glowing beneath him, and he was dying from the anticipation.

“It’s do or die, my love, do or die”, she whispered with a smile. That was all he needed, with that he was in her, they were once, inseparable.

The colors faded around them, swirling steadily. Everything seems to be fading away slowly with each breath. The smell the sight, drifting into the dark, the laughter going with it. The warmth was melting everything, so it seemed. But really, he was just drifting back into reality. He thought how it could be possible that she found her way into his head, even with such circumstances looming over them. She was a beauty, an angel, he would take her to the ends of the Earth, to the very corner of the planet, anywhere would suffice, but just not here. This was not the place for an angel. This was living hell, a nightmare. This was No Man’s Land he thought. Many people believed that this was the place the separated the men from the boys. To some, this place made men, but to others, it broke them. Where did he stand, he had no soul to break, but then again...thoughts wandered back to her, she taught him to feel and live again. He chuckled “I guess I do have a soul after all”, he thought.

It was time to focus on what was ahead; there was no way he would let her dilly dally into his thoughts again. Suddenly there was a rustling at the bushes ahead of him. The sound had pulled him back to the present. Alert and caution spilt through every inch of him. Did he really belong here? It wasn’t his favorite place in the world. He had many favorite places, and one of them was in her warm arms, arms that greeted him upon returning, arms that would entangle his broad chest against her warmth, she would entwine the rest of her body around him. That was where he really wanted to be right now. Again with the rustling near the thick bushes. He was just about sick of the vegetation surrounding him. But it was what he had to do, it was who he is, what seemed to define him.

Beads of sweat were pooling on his brows now, not from fear, but anticipation and the overwhelming heat. Fear was never an option for him, he never knew of its existence. We are men, and men either live or die. That motto that always ruled his life from the day he learned to walk and talk was “death before disgrace”. There was no other way to live his life. But lately, his mind has been thinking to what extent he can go to, to fulfil his duty. At what cost was humanity going to go, to complete their agendas. Until when would he be sacrificing his life to protect the lives of others, strangers, people he had no connection too. Shouldn’t he be at home, with the love of his life instead of crouching in an uncomfortable position waiting for hours for a situation to change? He wanted to give it all up until realization struck him from the sound of his name.

“Major Khan, look ahead of you, their advancing”.

Just then he figured the rest of humanity can just go to hell, he was doing this for his own interests; he had a family, a wife that crept into his dreams at night and thoughts while he was awake. He did this rueful job for her. To protect her, and make sure that she slept soundly at night, safe in their home miles away, and far from No Man’s Land.

“What’s wrong, why do you look so tense, talk to me please, tell me? “he just stared at her. She became upset from the lingering wait, the tension that was boiling in between them. “Why aren’t you telling me? You look so tense, and yet you always say that nothing related to work or family gives you any tension, only I do, so what have I done?“, she asked me anxious as ever. He sighed, heaving out a long cool breath, “Yes my only tension is you”, he answered.

“Sir? Do we open fire?“, the private asked.

Suddenly giggling explodes from her tiny mouth. Laughing miserably hitting the floor beneath them, she’s red from laughter. She’s humming a tune; a song written for her. She’s in the kitchen making tea, dancing to some tune playing in her head. She’s laughing and poking his sides while driving. Then, her birthday, blowing on the candles. “What did you wish for?“, he had asked her from behind, whispering in her ear so no one in the room could hear us. The guests were clapping cheering and being merry.

“I wished that you and I could live forever, just me and you and our love. Don’t ever leave me, please”, she answered, tears pooling in her eyes. He wipes them with his thumb, kissing her forehead. Whispering in her ear, “It’s not a wish my dear, I promise, man’s word; that I will make this a reality for you. I always do as I say, you know that. I’ll never leave you, not even death can separate us”.

She hugs him tight and it seems that time has stopped; the Earth itself has stopped rotating. Everything is at a standstill.

“Sir?“, the private pulling him away.

Looking down at the private, he notices eyes waiting for orders in anticipation. Screw humanity he thought, I made a promise to the only person in the world worth dying for.

“Well private, it’s either do or die”, I howled, pulled out my M4A1 carbine, feeling its weight on me and fired.