Chapter 1
I knew this obsession of mine would not last long.
When he breaks up with her, I'll break up with him. It’s nothing personal, it’s something I can’t control.
I’m not attracted to those that I can get easily. I am not attracted to those that are easily available - everyone can get them. I don’t want something that is available to everyone. I want something forbidden, something I should be fighting for, but it’s actually going to fight for me.
I often don’t even notice them until I see someone on their arm or arms around their neck. I don't remember their names because they don't matter.
‘Honey, baby, heart’ always do their job. They don’t even notice that I never address them by name. While I am on them, they are the ones who say my name, not realizing that they are giving me even more power in their pathetic lives.
The power that flows through me in these acts overpowers every possible regret of their 'beautiful halves'; they don't know it, but I'm actually doing them a favor - the real one wouldn't cheat on you, not even with me.
At first I tried, did my makeup, wore perfect clothes I did not feel comfortable in, but later I realized that's why I fail, their partner works for them, they don't need another one to do it.
They like to earn something, so why shouldn’t I let them earn… me?
The pleasure is only even greater when I give them that pleasure to get me.
Those poor souls try to impress me, they do everything they never had to do, because they think they can get me that way.
I don't mind that, on the contrary, it amuses me when I see pain and exhaustion on their faces.
But they don't know that's not all I see, I also see their knees trembling while I take my bath, their hands quivering while washing my hair, secretly splashing their faces with cold water to make sweat and redness disappear from heat and fatigue.
At the beginning, I also had to pretended not to be tired, but luckily after a while I got the long-awaited stamina, they would have it too, but they don't, because they don't do something like that with those they have.
They start hoping it will be like that every time, but they don’t realize that such a thing doesn’t exist with me. The first time with me is their last…
Once I get them, they are no longer fun.
They are something I had, I know how it is and it’s not exciting to me anymore.
I’m adventurous, I want to try everything I haven’t, so I don’t look back on my past.
That's why I leave them before they are aware of it.
It's a shame I have never saw their facial expressions when they read the message I leave before I leave their bed, but their canine looks please me enough after we meet on the street (if they’re lucky enough to see me again).
When I see that they have returned to those they left because of me, I feel that my work has not been done well, so I feel the challenge again, but not for them.
After all that...
I got what I wanted, their pathetic lives have nothing more to give me because I got everything - attention, gifts and perfect sex. Is there anything more important and better than that?
I don't think so.
