Silent Art

Evelyn drove through the streets of Cambridge, the heavy rain hitting the car’s windows, thunder lighting up the sky, street lights flickering ahead of her. The neighborhood was deserted, people having taken refuge in their homes from the storm. She could see a family through a window, warming up by the fire, playing games and drinking, if she had to guess she would say it was hot chocolate, she loved it when she was a child, she still loved it.

Her grandma always did it on days like these or when she was sad, to cheer her up.

Facing forward she spotted her grandparents red Aston Martin DB5 parked on the path to the garage, she smiled to herself. They were such a show-off.

She remembers the firts time she drove it, she was a nervous wreck. Evelyn had just gotten her driving license and her grandma proposed- no, forced her to drive it, it was true that she’d always wanted to drive it, since she was a child, but actually driving it was another thing! She was anxious, the car had been on her family since 1967, a gift from her grandad to her. Victoria, her grandma, adored that car, having shared it with her husband all her life, it were like their second child, a reminder of the love they shared. Evelyn was frightened to use it thinking that she would crash or break it and destroy one of the most important things Victoria had of her late husband, but she always drove her up to conquer her fears, always had faith in her, so she leaded her outside, took her to the car and gave her the key.

Just before she started the engine her grandma grasped her arm and said. ‘I have faith in you Eve, but you hurt my old boy and you won’t have land to run.’

Evelyn shook her head at the memory and parked before the house. Green grass filled the front garden, it was a bit neglected, with some weeds and fallen leaves from the big tree that stood on its side.

She took in the house before her, in this house she had spent the most amazing moments of her life, the only place where she had really know pure happines. And now it was empty of any light. Dark. Void.

Closing her eyes she sighed deeply. Shouldn’t have come, even less with this weather. But she knew she had to do it, if not now then when? Would have made more excuses.

She took a deep breath, got out of the car and went running to the door. She took the key out of her purse and opened the door, went in and closed it softly behind her.

She put the light on and looked around, the hall was just like the last time she had been here, some of the paintings she made her hung on the wall, the glass table full of papers and letters, flowerpots stood by the staircase.

She went down the hall and arrived at the living room, a big white couch stood before the window that overlooked the front garden, opposite it was a shelf with a tv and photos, she went in and looked at them, almost all of them were of her.

She picked one.

It was of her and her grandparents, she wouldn’t have been more than eight in that photo. They were in the back garden, the sun was shinning on them, she was on her grandad shoulders, Victoria stood next to them with her arm around her husband waist, the other holding a painting Evelyn have made that same afternoon, they were full of paint and they all wore a smile on their faces. It was some of the last memories that she had of her grandad.

In that moment it hit her hard that she would never see neither of them again.

A tear fell on the frame, she rubbed her eyes and sat down on the floor clenching the photo to her chest as she cried.

Her chest hurt, never have she knew a pain like this, so consuming. It felt like half of her heart has been ripped from her, leaving her lost and detached.

Her grandma was the most important person in her life, the only person who truly accepted who she was, the one who have been with her on every step of her life, who encouraged her to follow her dreams, to hell with the consequences she said.

If only I had the same courage as her, she thought.

Evelyn had a special connection with her, one that she knew would never have again.

She didn’t know who long she sat on the floor crying, until a sound reached her ears.

Lifting her head she looked around her, she could hear the rain, but there was something else. Raising from the floor she put the frame on its place and headed to the kitchen, where the noise come from.

It was like a scratching sound.

“Hello?” she said softly.

This was starting to become scary.

The scratching become more fervent, it was coming from the door that headed to the back garden, she aprroached it and hear it.

Meow.

Oh god. She leaned her forehead on the door and suspired, giving herself some seconds to catch her breath, the took her keys and opened the door. A black ball of fur come running at her, scrubbing at her legs.

She crouched after closing the door, “Hey, you,” she said as she caressed it. “You are soaked, of course you are, I’m sure you didn’t feel the water with all this fur until it was to late.” It keep scrubbing and meowing. “You don’t have a collar.” said Evelyn in a soft voice as she looked at its neck.

Must be a stray cat.

“Let’s see if there is some food for you.” she said as she went to the fridge, the cat following her, “Oh look what we have here!” she took the ham and showed it at the cat, it got on its hind legs and meowed, she grinned and caressed its head. “You must be starving.”

She took a plate from the shelving, set the ham and put it on the floor, in a flash the cat was before it eating it with eagerness.

Evelyn stood up and dragged a chair to sit on it, the cat jumped in fright and went to the other side of the kitchen.

Shit.

The noise must have scared him.

She got up slowly, “Hey don’t worry I’m not going to hurt you.”

As if it can understand me. She crouched before the plate and called, it started to come, its steps watchful. “You are such a beautiful cat” she cooed, it was true, it was all black, unless its front paws that had some white in them, with some of the greenest eyes she had ever seen and one ear missing.

“You are so brave,” she said as it started to eat. “You mustn’t be more than one year old.” she commented as she observed its height. Getting up slowly she went to the sink to put some water on a plate.

It wasn’t even halfway and the cat was already beside her looking at her curiosly. “Here drink,” she put the plate on the floor when it was filled.

Looking around the kitchen she caught sight of her grandma’s old mug, Evelyn gifted it to her after she returned from the Alps when she was eleven. Victoria had planned to go with them but a sudden fall prevented her from going, so Evelyn brought her a mug thinking that it’ll make her feel better. Since then Evelyn always saw her drinking her coffee from it.

She picked the white mug and observed it, the trees and the moose that adorned it were blurred, but the phrase ‘To My Favourite Person’ still had it colour.

Evelyn remembers the tantrum that she made when they told her that her grandma couldn’t go, if she didn’t go neither would she. Her mother, Maddelyn, didn’t want to delay the trip because it would’ve disturbed her work schedule, at the end her grandma convinced her and she had a really good time, not with her mother obviously, because she was too busy with her work colleagues but she meet some nice girls and spend her vacation with them.

She put the mug on the counter and eyed the cabinet where her grandma kept the alcohol. Why not.

Evelyn opened the cabinet and took the Baileys, You must remember to put some ice on it Elyn, it will give you a refreshing feeling mixed with the burning sensation of the whiskey, her grandma told her when she let her try it on her 18th birthday. She picked a glass, put three ice cubes on it and took the bottle on her way to the living room, she sat on the couch, filled her glass and put the stereo on.

It was eleven pm, and she was drunk.

She only had three drinks.

Her low tolerance with alcohol made it go right to her head.

Evelyn was sprawled on the carpet listening to Tina Turner, one of Victoria’s favourite singers, and looking through a photo album, the cat took over the couch and was sleep on it, but not before having played with her.

Originally she only came to pick some things and go to her flat but the rain kept falling with fierness and she was sloshed so she opted to stay the night.

Evelyn closed the album after looking at the last photo and dried her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. She rose, went to turn the stereo off and stood before the cat stroking its fur, it was so thin, god knows when was the last time it ate, so little and with so many misfortunes.

“Goodnight.” she whispered.

Evelyn turned the light off, took her purse and went upstairs.

She paused before her grandma’s bedroom door, it was ajar, making her able to see half of it, she closed her eyes and suspired, I can’t.

She went down the hall and arrived at her old bedroom, it was just like she left it four months ago, the light blue walls were decorated with some paintings, her white desk filled with paint colours and brushes of different sizes, the easel that her grandad gifted her was overlooking the garden, the canvas that was on it half done, on the other side of the room stood her bed with a nightstand on its side.

Evelyn walked to the canvas and stood before it, on it was a painting of the back garden of the house, the ground full of grass with some trees at the back and a small fountain in the center with some benchs on its side, what it was mising was the small greenhouse that was on the right side of the garden, where Victoria planted her carrots.

Victoria really loved her carrots, and Evelyn adored the carrot cake that she made with them. It’s been such a long time since she ate one, and now she’ll never get to eat it again.

The months before her grandma’s death were the busiers and more stressful of her life, she had too many exams and she was falling, it didn’t matter how much she tried, her head just couldn’t do it, and on the top of it her mother was on her neck everytime she suspended or even when she approved, telling her that she had to do better! On these months she almost didn’t see her grandma and she knew she would regret it for the rest of her life.

She put her hand on the purse and took the letter out, her grandma’s attorney give it to her some days ago but she didn’t have the courage to open it, so she had been carrying it everywhere she went. She felt pretty confident right now, she didn’t know if it was from the baileys or if it was because of the aura Victoria’s house had, but she was going to open it.

Evelyn sat on the bed with her legs crossed beneath her and started to read.

Little Evelyn,I know you must be sad of my departure and it’s completely normal, you must cry and let your grief out, don’t let it consume you and your light. That same light that you brought to our lives the moment you opened that beautiful blue eyes. I remember when I went to pick you up from school, how you came running at me with the biggest smile on your face and a painting in your hand yelling at me to look at what you drew at school, or when your grandad teached you how to ride a bike, in moments like these your eyes shone even brighter. I don’t want you to have regrets or think of the ‘what if’s’, no, you have made me the happiest person in the world Evelyn, and I’ll cherish our time together for eternity, even in the afterlife, and I know you’ll do the same. I know what you must be thinking and let me tell you that you’re not alone, Charles and I will always be with you, we will remain alive in you, in the little things that you do, in your memory.

I have lived the best life a person can have, doing what I loved with the people that I loved and who loved me back, there is nothing greater in life than that my dearest.

Your life is yours to live, your dreams are yours to accomplish. Don’t life your live to the expectation of others Evelyn or you’ll see that you’ve lived someone else life and not yours. Make your own path, lose your way, to find it again, or create a new one, but do it your way. That is my last advice to you Evelyn, I hope when we see each other again you’ll tell me how soul-filling your life was.

Oh I almost forgot! As you should’ve already seen I’ve left my old boy to your care so you better not broke it or...it wont matter my dear! You are the greatest present anyone had ever given me. Just enjoy it like your grandad and I did.

Until we meet again my little Monet.

Rock them.

Evelyn read the letter four times, trying to remember every little word Victoria wrote, tears filled her eyes making reading the letter harder, but the same phrase kept replaying in her head ‘Don’t live your life to the expectations of others or you’ll see that you’ve lived someone else life and not yours’ . It’s not the first time her grandma told her something like that but this time it hit her different.

Evelyn always had a passion for painting, everyone who knew her could see it, even her mother. It started when Victoria gave her a painting kit for her fifth birthday, since then brushes, canvas and paint followed her everywhere, much to her mother dismain, who forbid her of painting in her house when she saw that it wasn’t just a passing hobby, thank god she’d Victoria who let her paint everything she wanted in her house and paid everything she needed to let her art flow.

All that changed when she turned sixteen, she didn’t know why but she began to listen to her mother, to hang out with who she told her to, go to the events that she went and even started the career that she told her to. And eventually Evelyn put aside her passion.

She did know why now, why she’d everything her mother wanted, she just wished her mother to notice her, to be proud of her like she’d seen many mothers do. But for what? It only made her miserable. A person who truly loves you inspires to follow your dreams, to do what makes you happy, they do not try to shape you to their image, they encourage you, like her grandma always did.

A sudden outbrust took hold of her.

Placing the letter on the nightstand she began to rummage through the drawer.

I could swear I left it here...

Here it is.

La Beauté d’Invention.

Art Gallery.

Christian Hawthorne.

On the back of the card was the phone number and its adress. She took her phone from her purse and dialed, her thumb ready to press the call bottom.

What if they didn’t pick up?

Or what if they rejected her?

Maybe it was too late...

This call could change all my life.

She pressed.

It rang, and rang again.

“Shit,” Evelyn whispered as she hung up, it was half past eleven! Of course they weren’t going to pick up!

She glanced at her painting and suspired, I will call tomorrow. She placed her phone on the nightstand and went to the canvas.

Why not,

she thought as she opened the brown oil tube, picked her palette, took her brush and started to paint.

Ring. Ring.

“Please shut up.” She groaned into the pillow. Having forgotten to put the heater on Evelyn was tucked beneath the duvet trying to keep as much warmth as possible, it was freezing outside.

Ring. Ring.

Evelyn half-lifted her head and grabbed her phone, looked at its caller and hung up. It only registered to her who called four seconds later, she got up like a zombie from its grave and picked her phone. She had three missed calls from her mother and eight texts

“She is going to kill me”. Evelyn whispered

13, Monday 17:19 p.m

Remember that you have to come 2 hours before the guests to get ready Evelyn.

14, Tuesday 8:03 a.m

Where are you?

8:10 a.m

Why are you not picking up my calls?

8:55 a.m

You have only 1 hour left. Don’t you dare come here looking like a meager, I won’t let you embarrass me anymore than you’ve already done many times.

10:05 a.m

Mrs Harrison has already arrived, if you do not come right now know that you’ll lose a big opportunity for your future.

The rest of them where almost all the same, the last one she had hear many times before.

You are a lost cause.

She blocked the phone.

Evelyn closed her eyes and tried to clear her head, Don’t let her get to you, no more.

Breathe in, and out.

In. Out.

When you fill suffocated you just have to stop, keep quiet for a minute, or until you feel good enough, stop your thoughts from running wild in your mind, feel the air filling your lungs, filling you with life and exhale.

Evelyn kept doing it for some more seconds.

She opened her eyes, now a little more relaxed with her grandma’s words.

As she was about to stand up from the bed she felt a weight on her legs, preventing her from moving, she rummage around the duvet and found the cat sleeping all curled up in a furry ball at her feet. She started to stroke its fur and it lifted its head right away, looking at her with its piercing green eyes, she felt pretty intimidated, “You are the one who come at my bed don’t look at me like that.” The cat didn’t even blink. “Will you let me get up?” At seeing that the cat was not going to move she started to move her feet.

Bad idea.

The cat jumped right at where were her finger toes and began to bite the duvet.

“Hey! No, no, bad cat!” she reprimanded. Evelyn curled up under the duvet with her back to the wall and her legs to her chest.

A few seconds passed with the two of them looking directly at each other, eventually the cat laid down and went to sleep. She smirked as she shook her head.

Evelyn finally got up and gazed at her room. She’d to say that she wasn’t the tidiest person when she was painting, her brushes were all scattered around her desk, the paint still on them, thank god beneath them was a paperboard, on the floor was the palette and next to it was her clothes, the ones that she had to take off because she put paint all over them.

She stretched and began to tidy up.

After cleaning the brushes and putting them on its rightful place she went to pick the palette from the floor when she saw it.

The card.

She picked it up. Could she do it? Could she be brave enough now, with the alcohol out of her system?

Victoria give it to her like a year ago, to make her see that she’d more opportunities than she thought, that she could still be what she wanted, and like a weakling that she was she ignored her.

Could anyone want her work? Could people enjoy her paintings or criticize her? She didn’t have an art degree like many people with that profession did. She was studing law, just like her mother wanted, and even if it didn’t make her happy it was something stable, just from having the name Woods in her passport was enough to make her rise as a laywer, her mother begin a influential laywer herself. It was the easy way.

Was it the way I wanted my life to go? she thought.

Something snapped inside her yesterday, something so powerful that she coulnd’t just shake it off, and frankly she didn’t want to. She wanted to live her life, do what makes her happy, even if she risked everything she had, she felt braver than ever, and it was not the alcohol, is was all her.

She grabbed her phone and looked at the hour.

10:47 a.m

She rolled her shoulders to lose some of the tension, although it didn’t help much, and called.

It rang...and rang...

It felt like her heart was going to get out of her chest.

“Good Morning, Lorette at La Beauté d’ Invention Art gallery, what can I do for you?” said a soft femenine voice at the other end of the call.

Oh god.

She stood there with her mouth open and her eyes unblinking, it felt like her voice left her body.

“Hello? Is anyone there?”

She came out of her daze, “Um..Hello.”

“Hey, what can I do for you?”

“I hear that your gallery it’s interested in new artists to display their paintings..” she said trying to sound confident.

“Oh yes, last year we started a project to help young artists promote their work, I take it’s something you’re interested in?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, let me see if we have some free position, this new project has been a triumph, people have been calling non stop...” Key noise could be hear at the other end of the call.

“You are lucky! We have two free positions, I’ll explain what you’ll have to do ok?”

Evelyn nodded her head until she realized she couldn’t see her, “Yes, please.”

“It’s very simply, to be able to enter you’ll need to have an appointment with Mr. Hawthorne where you will have to bring some of your paintings, there he’ll decide if he wants to exhibit your paintings on the gallery. Have in mind that the paintings you show him don’t have to be the ones you want to exhibit, it’s just to see if he is interested on your work. Is that good with you?”

“Yes, when could the appointment be?” Asked Evelyn.

“Mmm..” More key typing, “He has a free hour this Thrusday at 11:30 a.m how does that sound?”

“Perfect.”

“Good, can you give me your name please?”

“Evelyn Jane Woods.”

“Your gmail please.”

Evelyn said her gmail and the secretary wished her good luck before hanging up.

She suspired, “It’s done.”

I did it. A smile broke all over her face. I did it!

Evelyn knew she shouldn’t get ahead of herself but she couldn’t help it, it was a big step, not only for her career but for her inner strenght.

She spent the rest of the day carrying some of her grandma’s things to her car, she knew she couldn’t take them all, but there was some things she couldn’t just leave behind. Not even once Evelyn got in her grandma’s bedroom, where her scent was the strongest, she could almost smell it from the hall, it brought her so many feelings, she did not feel strong enough to go in but sometime she will.

The sun was already going down when she blocked Victoria’s door, she carried the last painting to her car and placed it in the little space that she had left. She turned with her hands on her hips and suspired, That’s all.

She took one last look at the house, at its beautiful stone walls, at the flowers and at the cat rubbind on the grass.

“Hey you mister,” she said as she walked to him, Evelyn found out he was a he when she caught him peeing on one of the flowerpots. At seeing her walking to him he got on all fours awaiting her touch, “I’m going now.” She felt sad leaving the poor cat here but she did not know certainly if he had a family or not, and either way she didn’t even know where she was going to live anymore.

If everything goes right she would have to leave her flat at the campus and look for somewhere else.

“It looks like he has taken a liking to you.” Evelyn looked at her right and saw a old woman walking to her.

“I don’t know, sometimes he looks at me like he wants to bite me.” she responded in a light tone. The women stopped right beside her and looked at her with a confused look, “You are Victoria’s granddaughter? Evelyn?”

Evelyn stood up and looked at the woman, a big blue jacket covered all her body from the cold, “Yes. I am.”

“I’m so sorry for your loss, she was a good woman.” she said with a small smile as the holded her hands on hers and gave them a little pats. “She was, thank you.” Evelyn responded with a rueful smile.

The woman looked at the cat and then at her, “She took care of him most of the time, she was his favourite, he doesn’t let many people touch him. I tried to once and he scratched all my hand.” she related as she shook her head.

Evelyn looked at the cat, “She took care of him? I didn’t know...”

“Yes, she fed him most of the time and he always prowled at the garden...even these last few days.”

He was waiting for her.

“So he doesn’t have a family?” She asked. The woman shook her head, “No dear, I think he has always been on the street. I thought of keeping him but my grandson is allergic, the man from that house,” she pointed at a house at the other side of the street,” Wanted to but he already has three dogs. And as you see he doesn’t like people very much.” she commented.

“Looks like it...” she said, deep in thought.

“Nanny!”

“Oh that’s my boy, it was nice to meet you.” she woman said with sincerity.

“Likewise...”

“Kate”

“Likewise Kate.” she smiled at her. The woman went her way and Evelyn cast one last look at the house and at the cat and went to her car.

Evelyn sat on the driver’s seat and started the engine, she looked through the passenger’s window and saw the cat sitting on the grass looking at her in the eyes.

She sighed and started to drive.

Yesterday she came here with so many fears and insecurities, today, today she kept feeling them, but she was ready to overcome them all.