Chapter 1
[Kira’s Prologue]
Kira
“You’ll be nothing without your mate, Kira.”
I’ve heard this all before. My mother was on one of her tirades. It astounded me how she hadn’t grown tired of them yet.
“Look at us. We live like pigs and work like dogs.” I bit my lip to hold back the snigger threatening to erupt. “Don’t you laugh! We are werewolves. There are customs and protocols to be followed. Why can’t you just take this seriously? This is important to me. Do it for me, if not for yourself.”
I could still hear her shouting as I walked away.
Even though I didn’t want to be bothered by it, it still stung. My mother’s words played over in my head like a record on a loop, reminding me I was 27 and still hadn’t found my mate.
I knew I should feel hopeless and lost. Except, I didn’t. I was happy.
I looked out across the distant lake to the clearing where I had first met Jack, my no-strings-attached fuck buddy. Taking a moment to cool down in the silence and breeze, my mind wandered.
I remember the day I first met him.
[5 YEARS AGO]
“How about another cup of coffee?” Charles interrupted my reverie, his brown curls bouncing flamboyantly around his face.
“Ah, no thanks. I think I’ll be going,” I said, trying to excuse myself.
“Hey you! Another cup of coffee for the lady, please,” Charles insisted before I could argue, snapping his fingers impatiently to the passing waiter. He then turned his attention back to me. “Now, what was it you were saying?”
I scoffed, dropping my head into my hands. God, I couldn’t believe I let my mother talk me into this again. I hated going on these dates. If it wasn’t for her angry insistence on me finding a mate, I would’ve been anywhere else at that moment.
“Oh, come now,” Charles pressed on, oblivious to any hint I was giving. “Surely being an Omega hasn’t affected your ability to hold a decent conversation? Or do you lack in that department, too?”
“No, of course not,” I winced.
My being an Omega was my least favourite topic of any conversation. Of all the dates I had been on, my class was the most interesting and the most damning thing about me. According to my dates, anyway.
I hated that they so often saw it that way. I wanted to feel more like a person than a rank. It wasn’t my fault that my mother had never found her mate.
There had to be a way that I could sneak out of here without having to indulge much further in Charles’s observations of me and my class.
He leaned back and folded his arms across his chest, eyeing me curiously. “No? So you’re as well educated as any Beta, are you?”
I smiled politely back at him as if I thought him amusing. I didn’t. I found him overtly pompous and predictable.
A second later, the waiter came back with another cup of coffee for me. Shit. It was either endure another half hour of this prick or think fast.
The former was not an option. So, thinking fast, I expertly fumbled the cup of coffee. The steaming hot liquid went spilling right into Charles’ lap.
It was hard work trying to hide my wicked grin as he screamed in pain, beating at his searing crotch with a napkin.
The funniest part, by far, was the overly apologetic waiter who dove right in there, much to Charles’ dismay. I almost wasted my chance at a clean exit just to watch him inappropriately fondle my blind date in a desperate and completely futile attempt to soak up the coffee.
I took a mental snapshot of Charles’ glowing red face, spittle flying from his cracked lips as he barked expletives at the poor waiter. This memory would bring me endless joy later. Then I ran out of the cafe as fast as I could.
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I bolted past the familiar hot spots and businesses of my hometown in Lazuli until I reached a clearing at the edge of my pack’s border, where I stopped to catch my breath. I tilted my head up to the sky, taking in the smells of the surrounding earth.
“Why do you lift your head like that?” asked a masculine voice so rich and smooth that my legs quivered.
I lowered my chin, focusing on the handsome, dusty blond man with the bluest eyes I had ever seen.
His chest was damp with sweat, as if he had just finished with a late afternoon run. The sun shone down on his wetness, highlighting the deep curves of his muscles.
The hair on the back of my neck prickled, and a tantalizing warmth spread throughout my middle. This could easily have been attributed to my sudden physical exertion.
But I knew better.
“Why do I lift my head?” I asked him, confused by his question.
He chuckled warmly, looking amused. Amused but also satisfied by my obvious fluster. Like he knew exactly the effect he was having.
“You know, if you look directly into the sun that way, you’ll go blind.”
“No shit.”
Of course. The hot ones always have something that ruins it. In this guy’s case, it was his mouth. If only he’d kept it closed.
I turned my back on him and went back to soaking up the moment. But the moment wasn’t there anymore. Mr. Body-from-the-Gods made sure of that.
“So, are you gonna answer my question, or…?”
I sensed him drawing closer to me, and every muscle in my body stiffened. His musky scent, tinged with fresh perspiration and something else I couldn’t quite place, curled its way up my nose.
Now I was the one sweating. And no, that wasn’t from the run either.
“Well?” He wasn’t giving up. Go figure.
“I don’t make a habit of answering stupid questions,” I said.
The man laughed again, and I peered at him through slits in my eyes. He was wiping the sweat from his face with his shirt, giving me a front-row seat to a set of rock-hard abs.
Jesus.
Talk about being conflicted.
I squeezed my eyes tightly shut and turned away from him again.
“Tell you what,” he said.
I could feel him right beside me. Shoulder to shoulder, but where I was keeping my head tilted squarely to the sun, he had his eyes fixed on me.
His unwavering gaze burned through me. I didn’t have to look to know.
“Please,” I mumbled, trying very hard to play it cool. “Don’t tell me what. Tell me nothing.”
But having him this close to me… That scent, the deep gruff of his voice, feeling his eyes devour me as if he didn’t know I could feel it - it was quickly becoming too much.
“Let’s play a game,” he said, as if I hadn’t just told him to shut the hell up. “You can ask me anything, and I’ll answer it honestly.”
“How many ways can I say I don’t care?” This time I faced him head-on. “How about you answer that?”
A charming grin crinkled the corners of his eyes. “You’re adorable when you’re angry.”
He reached out, and I felt my blood run cold and boil over all at once. With the gentlest of touches, he swept a wayward lock of hair from my cheek. My skin blazed as though he’d held a flaming torch to my face.
Goddammit.
How the hell was I supposed to be aloof and unaffected now?
I swallowed hard. Painfully aware of his lingering hand on the back of my neck. My heart raced a mile a minute as I took in the sculpted tone of the chest hidden beneath his shirt.
A flimsy shirt. One I could annihilate in seconds. My mind suddenly delved into the devilish idea of trailing my wet, hot tongue along his body. Taking out his cock and sucking it into my mouth.
I lifted my eyes to his and knew instantly that mine wasn’t the only mind in the gutter. His pupils dilated with arousal, the bluest blues from before now virtually black.
“You look like a woman who can appreciate a good time.” His thumb grazed the soft flesh of my cheek. “I can give it to you, you know?”
I had never met this man before, and yet, as he said the words, I knew I wanted them to be true. He could very well be the greatest lover I had ever known, and possibly the last.
The man stood fiercely in front of me, like a tree rooted to its spot. His face was so close to my own that I could see the beads of perspiration on his eyelashes.
Without thinking, I brought my hand up to his face and caressed his cheek. I felt sparks shooting through my fingertips, down to my abdomen.
He must be mine. He has to be. How could the attraction be so powerful otherwise? The word repeated itself in my head over and over again, ‘Mate, mate, mate.’
“You’re pretty presumptuous,” I said, going back to the game he wanted to play. “Guess your intuition let you down this time.”
I dropped my hand and took a step back, immediately feeling the bitter loneliness of the loss. But I was determined to keep a straight face.
“Is that so?” he asked with one raised eyebrow. “I’ve been told that my intuition is never wrong.”
“Who told you that? Your mother?” I set my jaw and squared my shoulders. “Little boys should learn not to believe everything their mothers say.”
A strange shadow passed behind his eyes, making them seem even darker as he closed the distance between us once again.
“Oh, I assure you, I’m anything but little.” He leaned in so that his lips brushed temptingly against mine.
A defeated breath escaped my parted lips. Not part of the plan, but for the love of all the Gods, what more could I do?
“How dare you speak to me like this? We don’t even know each other,” I breathed.
He used both his hands to grip my waist and pulled me against him with such force I couldn’t help but gasp out loud. My eyes searched his, openly burning with desire.
I hoped he couldn’t sense my desire pooling in a sticky heat between my thighs.
He dipped his head and sniffed my neck, inhaling deeply, filling his lungs. I took the opportunity to breathe him in, too. His hair carried the scent of wild berries and sodden earth - a sweet alchemy that rendered me powerless.
“I can’t answer that question,” he said, his voice low. “All I know is that I couldn’t stop from coming over here when I saw you. And whatever I’m feeling, you’re feeling it too.”
He pulled back then, just enough so that he could look straight into my eyes. His lips were still so close to mine that I could feel his hot breath on me.
Fuck it.
I stood on my tiptoes and pressed my mouth against his. We met in a crash of white-hot rolling desire, our tongues hungrily exploring the mystical attraction.
The kiss intensified. His fingers tangled in my hair, pulling me into him until I was sure he’d devour me whole.
It was at that moment that I realized this man was not my mate. As good as the kiss was, it didn’t shake the earth beneath my feet. All I felt was pleasure.
And since I had nothing to lose with this achingly handsome stranger, I wasn’t about to pass up on the pleasure factor.
I quickly pulled my shirt from my body and let it fall to the cool twilight-lit grass. I heard his breathing pick up as he stared at my naked chest.
“Your turn,” I whispered.
He nodded and stepped out of his shorts. I licked my lips at the sight of his long, hard cock straining for release. His eyes were locked on mine. He was waiting.
I wrapped my hand around his shaft with a firm grip, my own arousal pulsing at the sound of the thick growl that came from deep in his throat. For all his big talk, I knew then that I had him right where I wanted him.
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[PRESENT]
The smell of sweet pine brought me out of my flashback – Jack had arrived. I wrapped myself tighter in my shawl to fight off the winter chill. The grass behind me rustled as Jack moved in closer behind me.
I heard him sigh, and I turned around to look at him. His face looked tired, as if he hadn’t been getting enough rest, but the corners of his mouth tilted upwards slightly, letting me know he was happy to see me.
“Hi,” I said sweetly, smiling back at him.
“Hey,” he replied, his eyes focused on the ground.
Something was wrong, but knowing Jack, he would not offer that information willingly.
“Are you okay?” I reached out for him, but he slipped away.
“I’m fine.”
“You don’t seem fine.”
“I am. Let’s go,” he grunted, his small smile evaporating.
I watched him walk towards his car and thought about pushing him to open up. Clearly, there was something up, and I didn’t want it to ruin what little time we had together. Maybe something was going on with his pack?
Jack’s position as the son of Joseph Knight, the Alpha of one of the biggest packs in the US, meant he often had more on his mind than I could even begin to understand.
What could I, an Omega, do to aid him in his troubles? How could I advise him? Understand him? Empathize with him? These had always been concerns that flooded my mind from the day Jack and I started seeing each other.
I had often wondered how our relationship had not fizzled out over the five years we had spent pleasuring each other. The only thing that either of us had in common was our inability to find a mate.
Neither one of us had found our rightful soul-bound mate in all this time. And no, five years later, we were still as lost as we had been in our youthful twenties.
But at least we could be lost together.
I had never felt the burden of needing to find my mate, though my mother had often tried to enforce that concern on me. I knew Jack often felt the pressure of his responsibility to his pack and family. It was as if he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders.
I didn’t have the strength, the knowledge, or the understanding, to help Jack move his mountains while walking in his father’s footsteps.
All I could offer him was freedom.
Once a month we would meet at the clearing, and drive to a hotel where we would spend the evening making love and being free. I wished some of those nights would go on forever. With no one else did I have that simple sense of belonging.
I would never tell him that, though. Holding on was against the rules. Falling in love…
We were there to revel in each other and move on until the next time. One night of being totally free and satisfied and then a month of waiting.
But tonight Jack didn’t look free. He looked like a captive in his own thoughts.
“Come here.” I leaned in under his enormous cowboy hat to kiss him.
This was his disguise to dodge the paparazzi. I always thought it made him look like a hot cattle rancher.
“Not here. Not yet,” he said, turning away from me and walking back towards his car.
I followed close behind, disappointed by the rejection. As we got to his car, the weight of his silence had become too intensely unusual for comfort.
“You know, my mother tried to set me up again,” I told him, trying to lighten the mood.
Silence.
I’m at a loss. It’s like he didn’t even want to be there with me. Which would be a first.
But I’m determined to salvage our night. I’ve waited too long to just throw up my hands and watch it fall to shit.
“And then she went on and on about how I don’t even try to find my mate,” I continued, watching his face for signs of life.
Jack sighed as he started the engine.
Five years. And his walls were still as impenetrable as ever.
I swallowed uncomfortably. “I wish my mother could just let me be me. I don’t want a mate. All the guys I date are so title-conscious. They can’t get over my being an Omega.” I glanced over at Jack. His face was expressionless. “And honestly, it’s not the end of the world. I’m happy with how things are. I have a great job at Jugle Ads-”
“You’re just a skivvy,” Jack stated plainly, interrupting me.
Of course, that would be the time he felt the urge to speak up.
“What if I enjoy being skivvy?”
Silence.
Wow, he really was in a mood this evening. Something must have happened at home. Something he didn’t want me to know about.
Maybe, if I let him know that it’s because of my relationship with him, that I feel so comfortable about not having found my mate, he’ll feel better?
Maybe if I just tell him the truth…
“But aside from that, I have you, and that makes me happy,” I say, checking my tone so I don’t sound too enamoured. Jack wouldn’t like that. “I am so unbelievably h-”
“We have to end this.”
We pulled into the parking lot at the hotel, and the engine died.
Something inside my chest did, too.
“Wh- what?”
“You heard me,” he said, looking straight ahead, his hands gripping the wheel so tightly his knuckles turned white.
“I don’t understand.”
The only rule we had that would bring about the end of our arrangement was if one of us fell in love with the other or one of us –
“I’ve found my mate.”
There it was.
I took a shaky breath in and looked away from him.
“Say something?” he asked, sounding pained.
I may have gotten some satisfaction from that.
“What do you want me to say, Jack? It’s not like it’ll change anything.”
Silence.
“Your mate is a lucky woman.” I kept my voice even, as unaffected as possible. I didn’t want him to guess at the pain I felt.
“Kira,” he said, leaning in.
And just like that first time in the clearing five years ago, my defenses abandoned me.
I turned my face to him, accepting his mouth, letting his kiss consume me. The sun was a ball of orange fire on the horizon, but that didn’t stop me from pulling myself into his lap right there in the parking lot.
I didn’t care who could see us.
Jack’s fingers tangled in my hair as he deepened the kiss. I felt him chasing the angry flush away from my face with every move we made, our bodies so close it felt as if we were one.
“I need you,” I breathed against his parted lips. “Now.”
Jack threw open the door and dragged me after him, my hands still groping at the buttons of his shirt.
We drew up to the front desk, straightening our clothes and smoothing our hair, looking like a couple of horny teenagers.
“A double,” he said, panting a little.
The clerk eyed us curiously but started checking us in without a word.
My fingers brushed the front of Jack’s pants, creeping toward the hard bulge in his crotch. I bit my lips to swallow back the moan threatening to escape. In a few minutes, all of that would be mine, inside me.
Jack’s breathing grew shaky as I massaged his cock, keeping a straight face, the front desk obscuring whatever was happening.
“That’ll be a straight eighty,” the clerk said. “Room 214. Check-out is at 9 am.”
He slammed his credit card onto the desk. “I’ll pick it up when I leave,” he said.
And then he turned to me and swiftly scooped me into his arms as he rushed to our room.
