Closure

Chandra wakes up but he can’t fully open his eyes, it hurts a lot, he also feels a dull ache across his body, he can’t tell if it’s because he’s tired or it’s the bad sleep due to the uncomfortably hard ground that he slept on. He rubs his eyes, in his eyes seems to be getting worse, his eyes dryer than he remembers it to be yesterday. He uses his might and opens his eyes to a bright knight. The sky is clear, a full moon shines bright but there appears to be a shadow of cloud that blocks its full view, or maybe it’s his eyesight that’s getting worse every day. Yet, the moon illuminates the ruin that he decided to spend the night in. He hadn’t noticed the details of the ruin, the weird cuts on the wall, the half broken hallway that he entered through yesterday. They hold a sense of mystique, he looks at it and can’t tell if it’s nature that added extra details to it or he’s just acting like there’s extra details on a ruin that is left in the open desert because people thought it to be not worth preserving. He slowly drags his body to check on his sheep, they are sleeping comfortably. He sits next to the sheep and drinks from a copper water pot. The pot and the sheep are the only things that he hasn’t sold to survive, they give him meaning to keep going: to not have to sell them. He’s been a sheep herder for some time now, he stopped counting days after the 17th day. Even then, he mostly never saw a clear sky; he was always too tired and fell asleep quite early with his sheep. The moon this night, how the beams from the moon reflect on the walls, on the ground, even on his own face, it reminds him of a time before he was a sheep herder.

He used to be from a small town situated in the hills in western Nepal. His father owned land and his mother brought a hefty dowry with her when she was married, so he never got to experience the hardships that other townspeople did. Most of the townspeople respected his family because, as the story goes: his great grandfather (who owned so much land that he needed a horse just to cross it) helped the then-village from starving by giving them food during a drought.

With this much prestige, Chandra was able to do almost anything. He never worked a day in his life and would wander around with no prospects but he did have one hobby and that was to read books, especially romantic ones. His parents decided they wanted him to marry someone in the hopes that he would have kids and settle down for them. When his parents told him about this plan of theirs, he got really angry. Chandra didn’t see the point in marrying someone for no reason, he said that he cared about love and that he would only marry someone who he loved. But, until this point, he loved absolutely no one.

Even then, no one in the town wanted to marry him. So, he had to travel to another nearby village. There, his parents helped create a new image of his: this extremely intelligent young man with skills that ensure he will multiply the success of his family. This worked, at least a little, so all the women in the village wanted to marry him. This made Chandra excited, he thought that even though there’s no one in the village that he loved till now, there’s so many women that he’s bound to find someone perfect for him. So he looked, from the poorest of the poor to the most rich lavish woman, he spent time getting to know everyone and in the end he felt like he found someone he loved.

Her name was Amisha, daughter of a poor peasant but still had all the values as the rich did. She was a timid young woman, as fair as can be, she had brown hair, dark brown eyes, and the contrast of her skin to her eyes made her look ever more beautiful. During the summer when the sun shined bright, her eyes gave the depth of the night sky, which anyone would want to stare longingly into. She was about 3 years younger than him but was very lady-like, specially for her age, and even though his family was pleasantly surprised that he found someone that liked him, they deep down thought that he didn’t deserve her and felt sorry for the girl. They thought, maybe through the mysterious force of love, he would change his ways and be someone reliable and take care of her.

Chandra was ecstatic, he proposed to both their parents that they should marry as soon as the local pundit allowed them to, which just so happened to be 2 months later, which was during monsoon. Chandra being himself, decided that he would take Amisha to his town to show her everything so she was able to get used to everything by the time they get married. This was an extremely unconventional thing, but he pressured everyone in the arrangement and it somehow worked. Amisha was travelling with him and his family back to their town. While they were on a carriage, he proposed a plan, that he would take stops in between this village and the town, this way he thought he could spend more time with Amisha. This meant he would have to take a longer road, a detour of sorts.. Despite his parents’ concerns, he bribed the coachman and the coachman agreed. During this trip, he used all the trickery he had read in the books to make her love her even more. He kissed her everywhere, massaged her whole body, gave her flowers every hour or so, and surprisingly, it was working, or at least it seemed it was. Amisha was giggling every time he told a corny joke that he also got from the books he’d read before, which, according to the books, was a good thing! You’re supposed to make her laugh!

After about a day of being on the road in this detour, it was very excruciating for everyone, including the coachman, who was frankly tired (in part due to jealousy) of the two love birds. They finally reached a small village, and decided it to be the first of the however many stops to come, the first of the carriage to set foot on the new village was Chandra himself, and he helped his dear Amisha get out as well. They both looked around themselves, some locals were staring at them as they’d not heard a notice of anyone coming to their village at the time of the year. He ignored them all, and let the coachman do the boring stuff of greeting people and exchanging greetings. Instead, he walked with Amisha to the corner of the village and they both sat down on a wall of what appeared to be an old fortress.

Some children, seeing new faces, decided to follow them and eyed them from afar, and to prevent the children from following them even more, Chandra gave them some money and asked them to bring khaja(snacks) as well as have some themselves, the children quickly ran to the bazaar and brought them some local food and ran back to the bazaar to eat themselves. Chandra and Amisha spent time talking while eating, during this time Chandra realised how much more he loves her than he thought he did. She was always listening to him, always interested in what he had to say, and it felt like she knew exactly what to say to him. She was like a friend, kind of. That’s true love he thought, to feel like the best of friends and never be tired of each other. As time passed, it became darker but they could still see each other’s precious faces. They both looked up and saw the clearest sky they’d both seen in their lives. The moon was not full but it radiated the energy of about two full moons, the stars were twinkling in a rhythm as if it was meant to send a message to him. The road illuminated, guiding them to a small house.

They thought that maybe it was the accommodation that the coachman had prepared for them. They, slowly, with hands in eachothers’ hands, walked following the illuminated road, it felt majestic, as if they’d been chosen by the gods, by the universe itself. And suddenly, she fell. Amisha fell. The road wasn’t all that perfect, it had huge holes randomly, and some of these holes looked like ravines.He couldn’t believe they had missed seeing such holes in the clearest of nights. Chandra cried out a shriek, “maybe the ravine isn’t that deep” he thought, so he jumped in, and he was right. Thanks to the bright night sky, he could see inside the ravine, which was quite small, but he couldn’t find her, he couldn’t find Amisha. He started crying louder, hoping that the villagers would notice, and they did. The village started making noise, as if they were coming in to help him. He climbed out the small ravine and walked sulking, still crying when he saw another ravine, this one seemed deeper, he couldn’t even see the bottom of it. He was in the world’s biggest predicament, was he supposed to be a man and jump, risking his life? Or was he supposed to be a coward? He tried to jump but realised, he is no man, he can’t jump. He can’t be seen as a coward as well, so he hatched a plan. He left one of his shoes next to the ravine and he ran towards the fortress. He heard a group of villagers go near the ravine, they saw his shoe and thought he’d fallen inside. They cried his name to see if he would reply, he didn’t. He watched the scene from behind a wall. They declared that night that he probably died. What was he supposed to do now? He can’t just go back to his hometown, people will think he left his to-be wife to die. So. he decided that night that he had no reason to go back to his old life, because he wouldn’t find another Amisha.