Chapter 1
"I hope one day, my heart isn't wrapped in paper memories of what we were because I am so tired of my thoughts creating thunder and hurting my heart. I don't want my heart to be a battleground for my suffering anymore. I am going to try and put these memories of us to rest. And hopefully, one day they wouldn't make a sound." - Unknown
On 5 August 2002,
A little 9-year-old boy sat on a heavy wooden chair that he had dragged from the other side of the room near a small window which overlooked the whole pack. He pressed his face close to the glass of the window and gazed outside, his little hands leaving imprints on the window where he had placed them.
The streets which were usually crowded with couples returning from long runs in the forest and teenagers grouped together testing their skills, looked deserted today. Women who usually stood in small groups discussing every little thing happening out there in the pack, while watching their kids playing, brawling and fighting, were nowhere to be seen.
He never played with the children. He was the only son of Alpha Kai Evans.
He was going to be the future alpha of Evans pack. He was the heir.
And being a future alpha was no joke for anyone, thus leading him to start training at the early age of 8. Nothing extraordinary or over the top yet, just the introduction to the roots of his pack's culture and business.
His young mind was often incapable of grasping all those tactics and techniques that he was supposed to master. His mother trusted him, reassured him quite often but the young boy somewhere in his heart was terrified of not living up to the high expectations of his parents and the pack.
But his father had said that they were the pillars which formed the foundation of the pack, so he tried his very best to understand them. He worked even in the play hours after completing school work as he wanted his ma to be happy again, his father proud, and his family back to the way it was once all smiles and kisses.
Not to mention, he wanted to be the best alpha out there, who loved and protected the pack members with his own life as he had promised his ma.
Even at such a young age, it was crystal clear on his face how much he loved and cared for the pack.
He hated violence, wanted to be an alpha who would be known for his level-headedness and peaceful ways. That wouldn't mean his pack would be weak, they would be the strongest pack out there who would be able to handle any force striking against them.
To distract himself from those now unattainable thoughts of being a future alpha, he gazed far at the vast land covered with dense forest. He hoped to see something that would hold his attention, for the time being, that would divert his mind away from the circumstances that he was stuck in.
But today, on this most unfortunate day of his life, it seemed his luck had completely run out. There weren't any wolves patrolling the area. There was no silly fighting and training going on in the large ring-shaped arena in the center of the forest. Younger wolves were trained there, and pack fighters often indulged in challenging each other in brawls. Others placed bets on which one was going to come out as a winner.
The blood, the viciousness of those fights, and the unforgivable attacks brought a big deal of entertainment for those wild creatures.
He usually visited his father's beta, John, or any other warrior who used to teach him basic moves of attack and self-defense. At the same time, the alpha observed juveniles and pack warriors performances and abilities and improvised them to his best ability.
He hadn't gotten his wolf yet, it would happen only after 7 months, on his 10th birthday. On that day he would shift into his second form, his wild form, his nature.
But he didn't need wolf vision and hearing to realize the calm in the pack.
Even all the birds in the forest had flown away; the little furry creatures that were always chasing after nuts were nowhere to be seen.
The silence was almost deafening.
The sun was covered with black clouds and the sky was dark and gloomy as if in perfect sync with his mood. He thought that maybe nature can understand his thoughts, understand him, but again, it was way too calm.
It was as if a storm would be hitting soon, mercilessly destroying everything in its path. And he would be left feeling utterly hopeless, devastated and scattered in pieces to be picked. He would be broken, never again the same.
He shook his head to get rid of such depressing and negative thoughts, burying his head in the space on top of knees as his legs were folded. He wrapped his arms around his legs to make himself appear smaller, seeking some warmth and comfort.
He craved the familiarity of his mother's arms around him, shielding him from the horrors of the outside world.
His stomach growled out of hunger as he had not eaten anything in two days. But he refused to go out of his room, his safe haven for now, in search of anything edible.
He turned to gaze at the bright yellow wall covered with sparkling stars, desperate to divert his attention to anything else other than his body's need for food and nourishment.
His mother had once told him that the yellow color symbolizes happiness and the stars represents dreams.
She had said that his dreams were always reachable, he just needs to concentrate and work hard enough to reach them, to be stubborn and powerful enough to attain them and to be smart enough to keep them forever.
He must always keep looking forward towards new ones, towards the future because there is no end to it.
Just then he heard loud and clear footsteps climbing up the stairs, making him snap out of the fuzzy thoughts clouding his mind. A shiver passed through his body making goosebumps rise all over the skin.
His childish brain had thought that if he wouldn't go looking for trouble then trouble won't come looking for him. It was a simple philosophy that seemed perfectly logical in his mind.
That's what had kept him cooped up in this room since last day. To remain absolutely quiet so that he wouldn't draw any unnecessary attention to himself.
His mind was telling him to run, screaming at him to evade from the fate that was standing just on the other side of the door but his feet remain frozen.
Instead, he pressed himself closer to the wooden chair, frame shrinking in itself, trying to shield himself from the unknown. Fear gripped his heart and soul as he closed his eyes tightly and little hands clenched to form small tight fists. His thoughts were chaotic, vision blurred and body numb, incapable of even a little movement.
He remembered his ma's words, her picture flashing before his eyes.
" You are strong enough to face it all Aadolf, even though it doesn't feel like it right now. Don't let your fear stop you."
Those words brought him a feeling of safeguard, helping in clearing his vision and mind out of that hazy state. Repeating the words in his mind like a broken record, he stood up slowly.
Suddenly the door to his room flew open with such force that it hit the wall on the left side, earning a loud crashing sound that echoed throughout the whole floor.
He tried to keep his face blank as he stared at the dull green eyes of a tall man which were filled with hatred and disgust towards him. They were blazing with so much anger that it was surprising that he was not burnt to pieces yet with their intensity.
The eyes were very familiar to him. His grandfather, Theodore Evans' eyes.
"All of this is your fault, you ungrateful, good for nothing, pathetic mutt. You brought bad luck and death to my family. You destroyed everything. You are a bad omen just like that creepy disgusting name of yours."
His grandfather, the new alpha of pack shouted at him with a voice filled with loathing and disgust. Hearing those words, he wondered maybe his grandfather is right, maybe he is the one who is a bad omen, maybe he is the one who destroyed the pack's future, tarnished his family's happiness into shreds, the reason for their demise, for her demise.
His ma. She was no more in this world.
"You and your bitch of a mother are the reason, my son is no more in this world. He is gone, he is gone forever!"
Hearing that however, the young boy discarded his thoughts for now and couldn't stop the growl that emitted out of his throat.
"My maa was not like that gramps. She was an amazing woman and luna."
In fact, she was. Alexandria Evans was a beautiful person inside and out. She was humble, kind-hearted and always used to put others need before hers. She thought about everyone and never left anyone behind.
She was like an angel, her face glowing like Moon herself. And like Moon, she used to shine bright irrespective of the darkness that surrounded her. She was ethereal. A true luna.
She was the one who encouraged women of the pack to fight and get proper training and become warriors thus leading the pack to new heights it had never touched before.
With her guidance, love and, support, Evans pack prospered and was now one of the largest and most powerful packs in the world. It had gained a tremendous amount of respect from the packs all over the world.
Not able to hear such crude words about his mother, the boy shouted,
"It's not my ma's fault, it's because of Dad that they both died. All of this is his fault. It's due to his actions that the pack will suffer and crumble down. It's because of him that the pack faced such destruction. He is the one to be blamed for everything that has happened over here!!"
Listening to the boy's words about his now-deceased son, Theodore lost control of his actions and attacked the young pup of his own bloodline with bare claws.
He clawed the neck of the pup down to the shoulder causing the flesh to disfigure in that area and dragged him through the hall.
He pushed him past all the rooms on the floor and people standing on their doors, down the stairs by holding his hand in a vicious grasp drawing out blood from his wrist.
He then threw his grandson down the last 10 steps of the staircase by kicking the side of his stomach.
The boy hadn't gotten his wolf yet so he did not have the physical strength to defend himself. He was not able to handle the attacks of someone so much stronger and more experienced than him so he bit down on his tongue to stop the screams of anguish threatening to come out of his throat.
He was not weak. He can handle this. He muttered this to himself.
His neck was clawed and was bleeding heavily, hopefully, his larynx not torn out. He did not understand that the immense and unbearable pain in his sides was due to broken and fractured ribs that were now poking his lung.
But one thing visible to him was the awkward angle his leg was bent at and the throbbing in it.
He didn't want to look weak, he wanted to be strong, for his pack and for his maa. He had to be. He didn't have any other option.
He tried to get up and raise himself off the floor with the support of his elbows to face the only living member of his family. However, he was not able to gather enough strength causing him to fall back down with an exhaled breath.
Theodore growled loudly and went down the last steps of the staircase quickly, picking the pup with his hair and raising him to the level of his face brutally.
The boy let out a loud cry of pain which attracted the attention of all the other wolves present in the packhouse. They all emerged out of their rooms and stared at the scene playing in front of them.
His body though in pain, his young mind still had hope and faith. Faith in his pack. Faith in the people he had always considered his family. Hope that they would stand by him, no matter what.
The boy gazed at them, his face scrunched in pain, eyes begging for help as he clutched the right side of his body. The pain in that region was still flaring, his stare hopeful and somehow full of trust that his plea won't go unanswered.
All the pack members shook their head one by one, not able to meet his innocent eyes and the questions he held in them.
He was stupified. Totally.
He turned to gaze at his father's beta, John and barely managed to whisper 'Uncle' in his anguished voice, with one word his throat feeling like it was getting clawed again and again.
However, his favorite Uncle gave him a regretful look, averted his eyes and walked out of the packhouse without sparing him a single glance again.
At the young age of nine, the betrayal of his family and his pack caused more anguish than the physical one he was suffering through. His heart shattered in a million pieces as his eyes watered for the first time that day.
The stench of betrayal was still fresh in the air. He was left speechless and hopeless while the reluctance in his people's eyes almost had him wishing that he was lifeless too.
He was devastated. He had lost everyone today in his life. In a single moment. He was alone, all alone.
And the main question resonating inside his head was 'Why?' Why would they do that? Treat him like an animal? Discard him like that?
His grandfather shook his head as if his mere face revolted him and said,
"Look at yourself, having alpha blood flowing in your veins and still begging others for help, how much more pathetic will your miserable self act, you devil spawn? Always looking at others to save your sorry ass and now look at you, you are shedding tears too. Always looking forward to creating a blunder out of little things, don't you? You just love doing that."
With that said he threw the young boy across the room making him collide with pack house bar onto the alcohol bottles which fell down along with him. They broke into tiny glass pieces, all getting stuck in his hands and back, embedding themselves deep in his flesh, drawing out another cry from him.
The stung of alcohol on his bleeding wounds had him crawling, turning and shivering to stop the agonizing burning. There was no stopping the agony though. And there was no stopping the painful cries emitting out of his throat which in turn caused more anguish in his throat, his larynx on the verge of giving up forever.
Meanwhile, all the pack member have now surrounded the packhouse and were looking at him like spectators.
They were standing perfectly still, holding their breaths, like statues, who were not able to see anything playing out in front of them, incapable of feeling emotions.
They were just watching and waiting for the end scene to play out as if they were watching the daily soaps on television as if it was the most interesting thing they had seen in their lives.
As he was wriggling on the ground trying to get up, more glass pieces pierced his skin making him bleed out more, more alcohol rubbed itself in his scampered flesh.
By now, he was breathless and just wanted his suffering to end, his pain to stop forever along with his breaths that were coming out in short gasps.
The Sun peeked out of the dark clouds covering it, its rays falling on his face momentarily blinding him.
Theodore's frame shadowed his face, there he stood staring down at him with his fangs bared, nose scrunched in disgust and eyes venomous.
Theodore struck last time, though not physically, but the last move which will surely result in more misery than any amount of physical harm that he had caused till now, that he can cause in future.
A move which will ensure that he will be getting rid of his so-called grandson forever.
A move which will certify him as official new Alpha, the new ruler of the pack. A move which will destroy any chances of future threats.
No, killing him was way too easy, instead, he wanted to make his death as long and as miserable as possible.
He wanted the pup to crawl and beg the Moon goddess to put him out of his misery, to just end his very existence from the face of Earth. He wanted the disgusting and pathetic creature to beg the first living being he will see for death.
He cut the pack bond ties with him and said,
"I, Theodore Evans, Alpha of Evans pack reject you, Aadolf Evans, as my pack member. I, hereby severe all the connections with you. Today onwards if you are seen in the territory of Evans pack or anywhere near, you will be killed at sight."
He rejected the pup and made him a rogue. A disease which will infect his insides like a virus taking over the host machinery and destroying it.
Though the pup will not succumb to madness as he hasn't gotten his wolf yet but will definitely be hunted down by both pack wolves and crazy rogues. He will be constantly on a run to save his life, both from himself and others and the moment he stops, he will become prey.
Even if he survives till his 10th birthday, he will surely die that day. Shifting is painful. But shifting alone without the help and support of his family and pack members will result in so much agony that whatever he is feeling right now will barely hold any significance compared to the amount of pain he will be enduring then.
The pack members had horrified expressions on their faces, but none came forward as Aadolf, their late Alpha's little boy let a loud cry so broken, filled with such misery that even they had to avert their eyes to keep their tears at bay. They had to bite their tongue in order to stop the whimper escaping through.
The young boy, however, clutched his shirt over his heart as if he himself wanted to tear apart his chest and throw away his heart so that the suffering and agony will stop.
The anguish was way too much for such a little soul to bear so his eyes finally rolled back as he lost consciousness, put out of his misery even though temporarily. He succumbed to darkness as for now it looked more promising than faces of people that he had loved and trusted blindly his whole life.
Theodore let out a hearty chuckle at his state and ordered the pack guards to throw out the now unconscious mutt into the woods outside of his territory. He wished that the vultures would feed on his flesh in his unconscious state of mind, killing him. What a way to die it will be?
