The Ruse

Right! Here I am, with a blank page and a strange story: my story.

Just like most stories, it starts on a day like any other. Not particularly cold or warm, no unidentified objects in the sky or news worthy events, just a day... a day that will end up changing the rest of my life forever.

Imagine this: it’s just your average Wednesday morning and your boss calls you into her office. You grab your tablet and open your to-do list. She smiles at you, so you take your usual spot by her desk ready to start. She begins with her usual list of duties, we run through our deadlines for the day, we discuss the upcoming staff meeting and pick the restaurant that will deliver lunch today.

I have been doing this job for the past three years, and I am damn good at it. I am her assistant on paper, but in reality I am the best editor in the building: even better than her.

PA suited me fine when I first started, but I have been passed on for two promotions already, currently awaiting rejection number three. Those bozos up in the top office have been promoting guys left and right, under qualified idiots got to be called editors before me.

I graduated in English Literature top of my year, and I was the editor in chief of the faculty paper, with the record read for the past decade. I watched and learned from my boss on how to deal with big and small authors, I can manage temper tantrums from elite writers and I have discovered half of our bestsellers.

I let my boss take the credit for my work, and now I am paying for it. I chew on my pen distracted by my own angry thoughts.

"Now, I need to speak to you about your application." She announces.

I raise my head to meet Darla’s gaze. "I thought the decision wouldn’t be announced for another week." She looks dejected and I know what she’s going to say.

"The board has been discussing your application." She shakes her head and I let out a groan. "I’m not going to lie to you Addi, they are considering someone else."

"Who?" I shouted, jumping up from my seat ready to storm out.

Darla gestures for me to calm down. "I know this is my fault, and I want to help you. What I’m going to propose is a little out of the ordinary." she continued, and I sat back bracing myself for one of her crazy schemes. "Do you remember the manuscript that made you cry like a baby?"

"I didn’t cry like a baby." I protested, feigning outrage.

She laughs. "You’ve been doing an amazing job as his editor but I need you to help the author’s personal image: he’s a little difficult, to say the least. Not at all what you would expect for the author of such a moving story." She explains.

"Do you want me to PA his ass?" I asked her.

She clears her throat. "Kind of." She finally replies. "I want you to pretend to be his girlfriend."

I choke on my coffee, splattering all over my new dress. "You’re joking right? How would that help me get a promotion?" I ask her, as I try to frantically wipe the coffee stains off my clothes.

"Just let me explain." She gestures for me to calm down. "Alexander is an ex-war correspondent, he is a famous photographer. The manuscript you read is very personal to him." I shake my head in disbelief. She continued. "His manuscript has created a lot of buzz out there, publishing companies have been begging him to publish with them. He is going to be a bestseller."

"He saw those atrocities for himself?" I wondered aloud.

She nods. "You see he has presented his manuscript to others but always ended up dropping them because of the editors. However, you have managed to connect with his work, with him. He has actually listened to your feedback." She smiles widely. "Unfortunately when you meet him… well… he is a giant arsehole." She laughs a little. "He needs someone to mellow the shit out of him, someone that can take his attitude and throw it back with sass."

I laugh incredulously. "And you think that person is me?" I asked her.

"I know it’s you. The only notes he accepts are yours. We know he is going to be a bestseller but we need to make sure he gets there. We need to soften his image a little. A girlfriend slash PA slash editor is the perfect solution. We can say you met to discuss the manuscript, and that things evolved slowly from there. You fell in love."

I close my eyes in disbelief, this is worse than I thought. "Why would he need a fake girlfriend? His book will sell, arseholes sell books. Plus, I can still be his PA and editor without the crazy pretence." I argued.

"Trust me, he needs someone to soften his image, but it won’t work unless that person can also challenge him openly." she continues.

"Why don’t you do it, then?" I questioned her.

"Because the arsehole is my big brother." she explains with a wide smile. "Plus, it’s clear he really values your feedback. God knows he would never listen to me, he ignores all my emails!" She groans in annoyance.

"Why would he even agree to it?" I ask.

"Because I told him to." She simply replies.

"Why are you doing this? Why me?" I continued.

"I have my reasons, you just need to trust me that I have your best interest at heart. Plus, you are a lot like him: your job is everything and you are unattached. Alexander will only sign the contract with you as the editor, he won’t work with anyone else, not even me. They either promote you or he walks away, and they can’t afford to lose such a big fish. As his editor, you’ll get to work exclusively with him, travelling with him as he presents his book. He hates to be bothered, so having a girlfriend will keep him from unnecessary attention. Once the launch is over, you will officially break up and you’ll get to keep your promotion plus get a huge bonus." she concludes her argument.

Darla makes it sound so easy, she watches me carefully as I consider her offer. A bonus sounds great, but I have a feeling there is more to her plan than what she is letting on.

"The board will never agree to this, how could they?" I wondered aloud.

She surprises me with her laugh. "Normally, they would never agree to blackmail. In fact, if they did find out we would be out of a job. But they cannot afford to lose him, he has already informed them of his decision. Without him, you will be out of a job in a few months. They are planning to transfer me upstairs, so I can share an assistant with Kurt."

I pale at her words and my hands start to shake. I can’t afford to lose my job, after years of hard work. I have almost saved enough to put down a deposit for my first place, losing my job would cripple me for sure while a promotion would actually get me there.

I turned towards her, a determined look on my face. "What do you need me to do?" I finally speak.

Her phone pings and she smiles. "The board has agreed to his demands, you’re in." She claps her hands excitedly. "Step one complete. X is meeting the board in the morning to sign all the papers, he will make sure your position is secure. Kurt is going to try to get them to drop you, he never took your refusal to work for him well. X will disclose you are together during the meeting, to pretend to want transparency but mainly to show them he won’t have them play with your career. He will wait for you at the lobby to escort you home after work. Kurt will be watching closely, looking for conflict of interest but you’re too professional for that." She claps her hand in celebration and I groan, struggling to believe I agreed to the charade.

"I have never even met your brother, how am I meant to act like we are in love?" I ask her.

She waves me off. "It’s better this way, the surprise will be a genuine reaction. Everyone else will think it romantic, trust me you won’t be disappointed." She winked. "No one can know this is a ruse but us, everyone else must believe this is real. My brother is a bit of a dick, but you must look past it. You must act like he’s your dick, you know what I mean?"

I think my jaw has literally hit the floor, and I recognise the signs of an impending migraine.

"So this charade is going to save my job." She nods. "Why?" I questioned her. "You have never been interested in helping me before, in fact you have cost me two promotions already." I raise my eyebrow in question.

"I never meant to be a bitch to you, I just wanted to keep you with me. We make such a good team." She gives me a dejected smile. "But I am sorry about it, I should have pushed for you to get your promotion. Instead, I stayed silent telling myself you didn’t need my help. I just blamed the board for it, but my silence has hindered your progression." she paused and took my hand in hers. "Believe it or not, I consider you a friend and I have been terrified to lose you. To be honest, I’m also hoping you could teach X how to be a little less of a douchebag and a little more human."

I squeezed her hand, surprised by her confession. Darla has always been friendly towards me, but I had always refused to spend time together outside of the office. Although, we had dinner together most days on our late hours at the office, plus drinks on a Friday. I had always assumed they were a boss thing, but in hindsight we were more like a couple of friendly co-workers, she had never treated me like her assistant.

"But how are people going to believe I’ve had a boyfriend all this time?" I asked.

"That’s simple really. You are an extremely private person, so private you could be in the secret service for all we know. My brother is the same, plus he has been travelling like crazy in the past two years. He’s not interested in celebrity status, he is a very private individual. You guys met at my place when you came to pick up the first draft of the manuscript. You had to meet a few times to discuss your notes in person, had a big argument about it that ended with a kiss and you stormed off to your house. X took you out for dinner to apologise and you started dating. He travels a lot, so the relationship has been pretty much long-distance throughout, but now that the book is about to be published he is back in town." she explained the backstory as if it was true. "You guys are excited to be able to be together full-time, you have even given up your apartment and are planning to move in with him."

I can’t help but laugh out loud. "You are crazy! I can’t even get you to read your emails before two coffees, but somehow you have managed to construct a back story worthy of a romance best seller." I teased her.

She laughs with me. "Trust me, this is going to work."

"Wait." I stopped her. "Did you say we are going to live together?"

"Of course, after a year apart, you’d be crazy not to.." She winked at me. "I must dash, I have a meeting upstairs. I have texted you X’s number." to my surprise, she wrapped her arms around me before rushing out of her office.

I walked back to my desk in a daze, I have just agreed to have a fake boyfriend to get a promotion, and I’m going to move in with him.

I see my phone flash with a new message from Darla. I proceeded to save his number on my phone and sent him a quick text to let him know I have his number but he never acknowledges it.

I decided to distract myself, and started on my list of jobs for the day. I did what I always do best: I threw myself into my work and before I knew it I was the only person left in the office.

When I finally make it home, Darla has left a package with my neighbour. The box is from an expensive boutique in town, it contains a light coloured pencil skirt and a shirt with a deep V-neck, a gorgeous thick belt, monster heels and some other accessories. A small note is hidden in one of the shoes.

An editor should always look the part. See you in the morning xx

I shook my head in disbelief with a small smile on my lips. "Crazy woman." I muttered to myself before getting ready for bed.