Fragile Truth (Nekopara)

“Onii-sama! You’re finally home!” Shigure leaps herself onto me like she usually does every Friday. “I’ve missed you so much! I can’t wait to see Chocola and Vanilla! They are coming for their weekly visitation, right?” She peers beyond my shoulder, but her expression turns sour. “And while we’re on the topic: I haven’t seen any of my lovely cat girls in a while! You know how much they-”

“Actually,” I interrupt. “That’s what I came to talk about.” I gently scrape Shigure off me with the very little patience I already had.

“Huh?” Shigure’s face twists into confusion as I close the door with no catgirls to be found.

“We need to talk,” I answered and I kept my ground.

Worry spreads across her face with furrowed brows.

“You’ve become so engrossed with your idea of perfection that our girls can’t even look at you. If they’re close to you they flinch and try to put on some kind of good girl act. Like, they can’t be their authentic selves around you.”

Shigure backs herself up. “Onii-sama, what are you-?”

“Our catgirls are scared of you. They don’t want to see you, Shigure. You hurt them so much that they second guess every little thing that they do. Hell, Azuki asked if she was allowed to get something from the kitchen. Allowed. To get something!” I keep my frustration to a minimum and patiently wait for a response.

Shigure stands there with her eyes wide, as if a deer in headlights, but her head stays down with her gaze to the floor. Frozen, she doesn’t speak. Or rather, she doesn’t want to speak. Not yet.

I continued, “they care so much about you that they didn’t want to tell me it was you who was making them feel uncomfortable. They have nightmares about you. You were the one who made them feel like they had to walk on eggshells around both of us. You-"

“I would never do such horrendous things!” Shigure raises her voice. “Maybe it’s you not being there for them. Maybe it’s because you work them all day long with only a lunch break, Onii-sama!” Shigure launches her words towards me in a preplanned structure, as if she was ready for this conversation.

"Excuse me?” I deflect back immediately with a hand over my chest. For some reason part of me believes her.

“It’s your fault that Chocola almost failed her Bell Exam. It’s your fault that Vanilla is so cold and blunt towards everyone. You don’t even sleep with your catgirls! That shows that you truly don’t care about them like you say you do.” Shigure grins like she’s winning the battle, even though her tone indicates frustration, she still seems so calm and diligent. “I don’t think it’s me, Onii-sama. Don’t you remember? Everything changed once you came back from France. You left us, remember?”

“Shigure. The gaslighting won’t work on me. I know what I saw. I know what I heard. Fuck, Chocola avoided bathing! I only found out when I had to force her into the bath with me and Vanilla. And you know what I found once she undressed herself?” I wait as if she’ll know the answer. “I saw a bruise that swelled all across her thigh. A bruise!” I loom over Shigure, and her cutesy gaze follows mine. “I saw Maple fall over her knees and admitted that she saw you yell at Cinnamon because she asked for a snack before dinner, but she didn’t want to say anything because she knew you would hurt her too.”

Shigure’s smile fades into a blunt one, but her eyes still hold that cocky grimace. As if none of the evidence I brought forward was true.

She hums softly to herself as she turns around—showing her back to me. I watch her walk towards the living room, and she shuffles herself towards the chairs in the middle of the room—digging around in a box underneath one of them. She brings out a stack of paper-clipped documents, folders, and clipboards with paper bound to them. Some of the documents were folded and ripped, some were even discolored.

Shigure turns back towards me, showing off various files, that I would assume, was about the catgirls.

“Why are you showing me all this?” I ask with vigor. What does she expect from me? Or rather, what does she want?

Shigure rotates a piece of paper in her hand, obviously trying to aggravate me. “You can’t have my catgirls because you have none of this.” She brings out the paperwork. “I have documents on their favorite foods, colors, and scents. I have their exact measurements, eating habits, and I even have all of their Bell Exam results.” She shuffles a stack under another, examining another piece of paper. “I know more about your precious Chocola and Vanilla than you do.” A vicious smirk develops across her lips as she keeps palming the files.

“They aren’t my only catpanions, Shigure. Everyone else is too. Plus, why does all of that matter? I know what I need to know.”

Shigure shakes her head violently. “That’s only true because I let you!” She giggles to herself wildly and drags her nose along the paper. “Ah... You’ll never completely have my catgirls no matter how many times you diddle them! They’ll be mine forever. If not socially, then legally,” Shigure says tauntingly. “We both know Okaa-san and Otou-san won’t be giving you any of their money; you have to make your own,” Shigure goes on to seamlessly brag, “and with you being so severely understaffed with the limitations of your baking skills—which Otou-san still has yet to approve you of, you must remember that—it will be much harder to organize any attempts of you getting ownership from me.”

“Hush.” I spurt out a hurtful, displeased huff. A gross cloud of discontentment scratches my skull, piercing every nerve that it touches.

I don’t want to believe Shigure. I don’t want to be this bad person that everyone secretly sees me as. I can’t be.

Can I?

While I can be sensitive towards criticism, I would be more aware of my actions as a manipulator, wouldn’t I?

Shigure pauses her rant, but her stature stays exactly the same: stiff and proud. Her head was held higher than mine, even though I was the one who started the confrontation.

I wait a second for her to speak, even tapping my foot a couple times. Still, nothing.

“If you were a great person, a person that you somehow convinced yourself you were, you wouldn’t be speaking ill of our precious girls. Especially against your own brother,” I try to remain civil, but it’s hard with all the idiocy that keeps coming out of her mouth. I know that’s what she wants from me. Once I lose it, she’ll only be able to dig even deeper into me.

Shigure shifts her weight to the other leg, but once again stays silent, waiting for me to dig a deeper hole.

A long stretch of nothingness bundles in between us.

“I’ll give you a simple choice. And only this choice.” Again, I wait for a response. Hopefully getting straight to the point will help with keeping my ground. “You can get your shit together, act like a normal person, and get therapy—or just some kind of help! Or.” Breathing in shakily I continue, “or you stay the way you are now and I adopt them. All of them. Every. Single. One.”

Shigure rolls her eyes with an audible sigh. “This is why Otou-san will never approve of you,” Shigure’s tongue rolls with acrimony.

“Excuse me?” I scrunch my face and get closer towards her. “As if you know anything about my situation! I hear from mom all the time how you could be a better daughter for the family!”

A strike of emotion flashes over Shigure’s already assertive eyes.

I almost clasp my hand over my mouth. I didn’t mean to lose my temper like that.

“You don’t know anything!”

Nails dig into my shoulders, breaking through the fabric, and piercing through skin. Blood stains develop around my collarbone. Before I could make sense of the sudden aggression, my body fell backwards at an alarming rate. I wave my arms to either side of me trying to grab onto anything to get myself back up. A lash of panic strikes me as I’m unable to regain my balance.

“What the fuck, Shigure?” I hissed painfully. I ripped my head from the blunt impact from what I would assume was the door. A swollen yet sore feeling quickly develops across my neck.

“Oh no...” Shigure’s eyes well up and the veins in her eyes begin to darken with red. Puffiness attacks the lower parts of her eyes and her eyelashes clump with withheld fluid. Her hand holds her mouth shut from shock.

I pick myself up, even though my head is filled with confusion and a heavy daze. To comfort the wound, and to hopefully regain my balance, I add pressure to the pounding pulse in my head.

My eyes widen from feeling some sort of liquid.

As I bring my fingers in front of my face, I’m greeted with a thin coat of blood.

An onslaught of emotions fester and intertwine with each other. Anger, yet desperation and hope—hope that Shigure would change, could change. I wanted to believe in my sister. I wanted to believe that she wasn’t actually like this. But also, how could she? What turned her into this horrible monster. This horrible person with these awful ideals.

Even though I want to live in my fantasies, I have to face the truth. The overwhelming distraught that she truly has changed.

And she’ll probably never change again. Not in a good way, anyway.

I shake my head with a hefty sigh. Still not ready to come to terms of reality. “So that’s the choice you’ve made.” I furrow my brows with a tilt of my lip. “I just wish I could ask why my dear sister has turned into a heartless, soulless…” I stammer on the right word, “bitch.” I tsk.

“Onii-sama! I didn’t mean to! You have to believe me!” Shigure rushes herself to my side with her arm extended towards me, but I slap away her attempts to help me.

“You’ve made your choice.” I turn away from her and grasp onto the door handle.

A surge of panic orbits around Shigure.

Shigure’s lip quivers lightly, obviously trying to hold back the tears that were already halfway down her cheeks.

“Wait, Onii-sama!” Her voice croaks and breaks as her breathing becomes faster.

I push all my weight through the door; I turn around through the doorway to rest my gaze upon Shigure one last time, knowing this is probably the last time I’ll ever see her. The last time we’ll ever see her.

Shigure brings herself to her knees and clasps her hands together in a bowing position.

Pathetic. Begging?

My face curls in discomfort as I ultimately shut the door. The crack in the door that once emitted light left Shigure in the dark. All by herself.

I finally arrived home and kicked off my shoes. A migraine starts to pulse against my forehead, yet anxiety from the confrontation finally makes itself present. A whirlpool of emotions stir my heart. I try to calm everything down by taking in a deep, hearty breath and letting it out slowly. I place a hand over my chest, feeling the anxiety stay constant instead of going away.

I should be happy right now. Why am I not happy right now?

I take another inhale followed by an exhale. Eventually, I made my way into the living room; the catgirls stayed exactly where they were when I left.

As I sat myself, each and every pair of eyes darted to me. Some were filled with worried expressions ranged with their own intensity while others were blunt or determined.

“How did it go with Shigure?” Azuki is the first to break the sorrow-filled aura in the room.

All of the catgirl’s ears perk up along with their body as she asked.

“Pull-May said you left with anger in your eyes. You never get like that.”

I ponder on what to really say.

To be honest, I didn’t know myself. How did it go?

It’s not like I got the documents I needed to properly adopt them; however I did get Shigure to realize her mistake.

“We talked.” I say as Azuki was about to speak again. “She immediately fought back and got defensive—even showing me every single one of your documents, hell, she even had a journal about every little thing about you guys.”

I pause to let the surge of anger calm itself. Taking a deep breath in, the adrenaline calms down.

“I can’t believe I even thought for a second that I wasn’t good enough: to run the bakery, to adopt you all, and to even have my own opinion!” I shake my head in disappointment. “She even used dad against me. I should have known she would, that brat.”

A couple sighs let themselves known throughout the room.

“So, are we really not safe?” Coconut’s eyes were red with the under of her eyes puffy with pink, and her lips were tilted down.

“Of course we are, Nuts,” Azuki comforts Coconut and holds her hand.

“But Onii-chan said that...” Coconut trails off and sniffles. She looks towards me. Tears stain her blemished cheeks.

“Well?” Maple pleas cautiously.

I shrug. “All I know for sure is that we will never have to worry about Shigure ever again. However, to get you all in my name may take a while. I hope you all can have patience with me.”

“Of course we will, Master!” Cinnamon pipes in. She rises from her seat with hands balled into determined fists. “Oh! I am so glad that everything ended up okay!” Cinnamon clasps her hands together and places them near her chin.

“We don’t know that yet,” Maple responds solemnly.

“Well, it could have been worse, right?” Cinnamon reassures Maple, but everyone else too.

“I guess that’s true...”

Coconut chippers, “I believe in Onii-chan!” She jumps up and runs over to me—throwing her arms around my neck in the process. “Thank you Onii-san!”

“Of course, Coconut,” I say with a smile and hugging her back. “I would do anything for you girls.”

Coconut tightens her grip around me. Her sniffles were still present, but I could tell she’s trying to toughen herself up.

“I’m...” Chocola tries to speak up, but her voice cracks. “I, uhm...”

“What’s wrong, Choco?” Azuki asks sincerely.

“Nothing, nevermind...” Chocola continues to trail her words off. Her hands were neatly stacked on her lap with her gaze at the floor.

“What do you think, Vani?”

Vanilla’s ocean-like eyes stay blunt, but her lips turn to a ponder. “I’m not sure, but I think Chocola is going to miss Shigure-chan.”

“Hey! Don’t call out Chocola like that!” Chocola lightly pushes at Vanilla with her hands.

“Vanilla is always right,” Vanilla smirks to herself as she plays back with Chocola.

“I didn’t even think about that,” Fraise softly inserts herself into the conversation. “Although, I feel bad that I can’t relate to the sorrow that you all have. I am new here, and I don’t have that much of a connection with Shigure like you all do.”

“No! It’s okay! Chocola doesn’t want new catgirl Fraise to feel any more sorrow than she needs to!” Chocola nods towards her with stars in her eyes.

Vanilla smugly nods along with Chocola.

Azuki meets Fraise’s side. “As Choco said, you don’t need to give us anything. We’ll heal on our own just fine.”

“Yes, but I am worried that I won’t be able to help out as much as I’d like to.” Fraise awkwardly plays with the hem of her skirt.

“None of you need to worry about anything, I promise.” I smile humbly. “I’ll take care of anything you all will need. And, if it helps you feel better, you all could write to Shigure how you feel. Good emotions or the bad ones.”

All the catgirls nod in agreement. They all give their signature smiles, showing Fraise their sincerity.

“It’s nice to know all that anxiety can finally go away. That’s such a good idea, Kashou!” Coconut smiles. Her eyes were still watery though.

“I would also like to write something to your sister, Kashou. I would also like to create a letter for Beignet-sama.” Fraise calmly requests.

A couple of the girl’s ears perk in curiosity along with a few tilted heads.

Noticing the girls confusion, I responded specifically. “Oh, I should write to my grandma too.” I tilt my head to start hypothesizing about what to write.

The catgirls all move their heads upwards in a “ohh” position.

“So, what are we going to do now?” Maple asks vaguely.

“What do you mean?” Azuki responds for me.

“Like, what if Shigure comes back and tries to get us back? What if Mrs. Minaduki and Mr. Minaduki get involved?”

“Hopefully, get a restraining order. If my parents get involved then I guess we will explain the situation.” I exhale hesitantly. “If they disagree with my actions and side with Shigure? I’ll be honest, I don’t know. I don’t know how I’m going to do any of this.”

“Don’t worry master, we’ll figure it out,” Vanilla toddles her head gently. “Besides, we don’t need to do everything so soon.”

“Yes! You can rely on us, Kashou!” Cinnamon smiles and bounces around.

Maple grins gently. “As long as you’re with us, we’ll be happy.”

“I’ll try my best to ease my mind,” I say. “Let’s just take it day by day. Alright? Thanks for being here for me, and forever.”