Keep Away
Wren
It’s been one blissful week since Kilian told me he loves me. One week of finally having a boyfriend, and sleeping with him in my bed. To say I’m incredibly happy is an understatement. I still feel the weight of everything happening at home, but with Kilian beside me, it’s infinitely lighter.
Today is my eighteenth birthday, and it feels like a whole new world is opening up to me. Kilian won’t tell me his plans, but I know he has something special in mind. He left early this morning to “get stuff done.” He might think he’s clever, but I know him too well. Not well enough to figure out his surprise, but enough to know there is one. Since he borrowed my car, I’m sort of stranded here for the day.
Our plans to move out are still in full swing. I’ve been packing up random things in my room. It’s strange to think about leaving this house, but while it holds many good memories, it has its share of unfortunate ones too.
I haven’t talked to my mom since she ambushed Kil and me in my room last week. But I think about her every day—it’s hard not to. Everywhere I look, there are memories of her. Dad asked me to pack up her things, and I’ve done what I can when I can handle it. But every time I step into the kitchen, I remember our encounter. Every time I try to clean out her closet, I find hidden booze.
Quin made the cheerleading squad at school, so she hasn’t been home for dinner all week. It’s lightened my load not having to cook every night. She just grabs whatever she can find when she gets home, so I’ve been keeping things on hand for quick meals like sandwiches.
She’s grown up so much in the last few weeks. Responsibility does that to a person. It’s kind of crazy, but I think she’s dealing with the family dysfunction in her own way. I’m not here to force her to be like me—I just want her to be okay in her own skin and make it out of this house alive.
Dad isn’t doing well. He’s been in a gradual downward spiral since the day he found out Mom was really leaving. He spends most of his time in his bedroom, drinking a lot. At least he’s not mean when he drinks—he just sleeps a lot.
I suppose it’s normal for someone to go through a phase like this during a divorce. He says it won’t be messy—Mom isn’t asking for anything, and she’s going to sign over her rights to us and the house willingly.
I have to admit that hurt. I haven’t had the heart to explain it to Quinny, and I doubt Dad will either. He usually filters bad news through me. Mom said she would be here for us, so why would she just give up and sign over her rights?
I guess it doesn’t really matter for me—by the time the paperwork is signed, I’ll be eighteen and in charge of my own care. But for Quinny, I know she misses Mom. I see it every day. She understands that Mom hurt me, and she knows her drinking is a problem, but she’s still just a girl who loves her mom. I don’t ever want to make her choose.
As for my mom, she admits her drinking is a problem too, but she’s not willing to stop. She says she can’t imagine what it would take. I just don’t understand that, but I’m tired of wallowing in her issues. I’m ready to make a life for myself. I’ll be here for Quinny, but that’s all I can promise.
Gael and Declan are great. I thought it would be awkward for them to be around Kil and me now, but it’s not—it’s the same as it always was. They tease us if we get lovey-dovey, but I think everyone is like that.
I apologized to Gael for my part in Homecoming-gate, and he’s okay. He said everything worked out for the best. I’ve done a bit of extra work trying to repair our friendship, but now he thinks I’m smothering him, so I’m trying to take a step back.
Kilian has been encouraging me to get back to my songwriting. It’s hard without a guitar—it’s just words on a page—but I still like it. Ever since Mom got drunk and threw my guitar over the loft and smashed it, I haven’t played.
When that happened a few months ago, Dad offered to buy me a new one, but it didn’t feel right. As long as Mom was in the house, I never knew when she’d go off next. Now, I feel like I can finally move on and try again. It feels like, after everything we’ve been through, life is starting over.
“Hey! Happy Birthday!” Quin squeaks as she steps into my bedroom.
“Thanks, Quinny,” I spin around and open my arms to her. “What are you up to today?”
“Hanging out with my favorite sister.”
“I’m your only sister,” I pinch her cheek.
“You know what I mean,” she tosses her red hair over her shoulders. “Let’s go to the mall or something.”
“You’re up to something,” I raise an eyebrow, trying to figure out her body language.
“Maybe,” she waves a hand. “Now c’mon.”
“Kil has my car,” I protest as she tugs on my hand.
“Dad said you can take the truck, let’s go...” She pulls me out the door.
“Ugh, alright.”
We make our way downstairs to find Dad’s keys and my purse. Before I know it, we’re off to the mall.
Once we arrive, we grab coffee and head to the only store I like. It’s a boutique that has unique clothing and some vintage items too. It’s different from what we can find at other shops in the mall. Quin hates it, but it’s my birthday, and she dragged me here, so she’ll have to suffer through it.
After we peruse the shop for a while, Quin drags me to the food court and convinces me to eat a soft-baked pretzel with cheese.
“Can we go home now? I have a lot to do,” I whine as she pulls me along the mall’s sidewalk.
“You’re not supposed to be working on your birthday,” she reminds me.
“But…”
“Damn, Wren,” she laughs. “Kilian wants me to keep you away!”
“Oh, well, why didn’t you say so?” I giggle.
She rolls her eyes at me.
I get why she made me leave the house now, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m tired of shopping. “Can we go to the lake instead? I just don’t like the mall as much as you.”
“You’re the birthday girl,” she shrugs.
We walk back to Dad’s truck and get inside. I drive to Cedarwood Lake. It’s one of my favorite places. We spent lots of summers here during our childhood, and it’s one of our happy places—a place where I can remember a fun childhood with a loving family.
After parking, Quin and I get out and find a nice spot to sit in the grass and watch the sun gleam off the water.
“Do you remember when we used to play food spies?” Quin asks, watching the water lap against the shore.
“Oh my goodness, yeah, that’s so funny,” I can’t stop laughing. “Weren’t you like Special Agent Popcorn?”
“Yes, Sno Ball…” She nudges my shoulder.
We giggle and laugh for a long time, reminiscing about being kids, until Quin has a realization. “You’re officially all grown up now, huh?”
“No more food spies,” I say playfully, but it hits me in a soft spot, and I suddenly feel emotional.
“I’m happy for you and Kilian, really,” she musters a smile for me, squeezing my hand. “But I’m going to miss you.”
“We won’t be far away,” I squeeze her hand back. “You can come over whenever you want.”
“I know, and I have a lot going on with school and cheer, but I just know,” she sniffles, “It’s going to be weird not seeing you every day.”
“I guess it was always going to happen eventually, but I’ll miss you too.” I wrap my arm around her.
We share a hug, and I enjoy the warmth of it. But as soon as we break away, I’m desperate to get out of this emotional space. “So how long do you have to keep me away?”
“Until four…” She shrugs.
“What is that boy up to?” I laugh.
“Can’t tell,” she teases me with her eyebrows.
“Why not?” I cross my arms over my chest.
“Well, I literally can’t tell,” she giggles. “He didn’t even tell me because he said I’m not good at keeping secrets.”
“I guess he’s right, considering you already told me he said to keep me away,” I bump her shoulder playfully.
“Well, what should we do to waste time?” She meets my eyes.
“I don’t know,” I run through ideas in my head. “Maybe we should go to the flea market? It’s been so long…”
“Yes! Yes!” She clasps her hands together. “We can find stuff for your new apartment.”
“We’ll see, I’m supposed to be saving money right now,” I remind her.
Within a few minutes, we get back into Dad’s truck and drive to the flea market.
We used to come here all the time with our Grammy when she was alive. She never had a lot of money, but she loved spending time with us and spoiling us. Grammy taught us how to thrift, and we still love it to this day.
After spending a few hours shopping in the sun and digging through flea market treasures, Quin gets a text from Kilian saying it’s finally okay for us to go home. We buy our last finds and head back to the house.
When we arrive, Kilian is standing in the driveway, looking incredibly handsome. He’s wearing a crisp dark gray dress shirt and dark jeans.
“Quinny! Look at him,” I feel my belly flip. “I’m underdressed!”
“No, you look perfect.” She pushes my shoulder playfully. “C’mon, go to him.”
I can’t really deny him. He looks so handsome and I’ve been missing him. So, I get out of the truck and run into Kilian’s arms. He lifts me off my feet and kisses my cheek. “I missed you today,” I whisper.
“Me too, but I think you’ll like your surprise,” he holds me tight.
He kisses me quickly before taking my hand. With a wave to Quin, he leads me toward the backyard.
“Okay, close your eyes,” he says with a grin.
I do as I’m told, but it’s hard not to let butterflies rise in my stomach. I always just hang out with the guys for my birthday. If I’m lucky, I get a cupcake. This is so different.
