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Once I had been a hikikomori person... six months. It was the days I had graduated from a university.
In the morning I wake up, then I go to a convenience store nearby my house (I lived with my parents). Then I buy a newspaper or a weekly magazine. I return back to my house and listen to various music. If I have time, I go to a library and borrow some books (at that time, I tried to read Kenzaburo Oe and Kenji Nakagami). Then I drink beers until dinner time. After eating dinner, I read the rest of the magazine or the books... That was all of my hikikomori days.
Pascal says “All of humanity’s problems stem from man’s inability to sit quietly in a room alone”. In short, we can’t be any hikikomori. Really? I want to say counter opinion to Pascal. Once I actually stayed in my room and sit quietly (although I read books...). If I had no hope in the future, I couldn’t do any creative things and therefore I just sat down and cried by myself. That is very hikikomori, isn’t that?
I have a friend and he had been a hikikomori person. I don’t know about his real days but he actually had hell in his heart. Yes, I also had hell at that time. I remember... I didn’t earn money. I ate that my parents served. On the internet, Japanese user calls the people like us “Poop machine”. Creating nothing but poop... Yes, it might be true but it is a bad thing? Do we have to be blamed?
I start a new novel “YARUSE NAKIOのBEAT”. I try to write about my past days and opinion. But all I do is just reading books. What books can I recall and write about? Anyway, I try.
