Worth reading, but needs work
I hate to be highly critical when it comes to typos or sentence structural errors, but this one has some issues. The biggest ones are mixed pronouns, inconsistencies, and places where the story jerks - no lead up that you would expect when someone say, has an emotional outburst. Those things that play into something happening. There are a couple of key places where this happens and you're left going... wtf? It can be a little difficult to read in areas, where the words in the sentence just don't make sense. It's clear author types as quickly as possible to keep up with thoughts, but does not go back through and clean it up a bit and make sure things are followed through with. And yes, it is a draft and it is going to be imperfect, I get that because I do the same thing - but I do go through and glance over everything generally as I'm writing to double-check that I didn't skip half a sentence in the middle of another one because that does happen.
Read the story now
Having said all that - READ THIS STORY
Screw the errors, skip over the jerks, and just read it. The characters are amazing people, the supporting cast is pretty good. The emotions are strong most of the time and you can really get a sense of their vulnerabilities in most of the important places. Some of the errors do throw some of that off, but, if you overlook them, you still have a really good story that, at it's most basic level, has the shine of a diamond within it. It just needs cut and polished to perfection.
I truly believe if author sits down and takes time to read over it, make some editing changes, reword some things, add a few details, fill in a few places, that this would be a truly intense experience that you'd read from beginning to end and then want to read it again.