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Lacks finesse of a finished novel
The main story-line is pretty solid. Most of the weakness lies within literary usage. Using modern day language in Roman times dialogue either shows oversimplification, lack or research, or just lack of care. Also literary usage in general. Not sure if you are trying to add a Supernatural or Constantine feel to this story, but it does not help you overall..
Give this novel another round of editing with a fresh set of eyes.
Was glued to the screen.
I'm in love with every aspect of this book, A masterpiece "cover to cover". I like how the chapters tel two different stories and become one at the end, with of course, the first few chapters giving backstory. I particularly enjoy Charter and his brothers with their accessible household for all sizes.
I hope this becomes published and is followed by a sequel.
Feels like a first draft.
The plot is indeed very charming. I just can't connect with the book like I can with other fantasy titles. The grammatical errors chop it to pieces and makes it hard to follow. More imagination than education.
I cannot recommend this book until it is edited thoroughly. I'm not sure how it has so many votes to be honest. Maybe it the book was not written in English?
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