To take critique well is, itself, an art.
The new edit of Usono removes the issues I had - it would appear, both. I find no sentence stubs, no words misused, no hooks that repel.
Read the story now
What I DO find is a story from the mostly-analytic mind of a Justiciar (this seems to mean cop with summary judgment rights) in a world where the normal human is worth far less than those with various modifications - and perhaps less than the artificial intelligences.
The plot moves in actions but not enough in character reveal/development - this being an excerpt, that problem could go away overall... I further expect that there's more on the bad guy, and recognize that it was the effort to give the bad guy background that resulted in the poor section I first reviewed.
I would like to see this tighten up and brighten up - more energy. As I said on the side, I think reading it out loud to someone and watching their face can tell you a LOT about flow!