This story is a supremely dark one achieved with ease. The prologue gets you the reader in the mindset that impeding doom is at all corners. No one is safe. I will say that this ghoul that is bound to Kevin in a way only to make him endure the worse forms of pain and sufferings reminded me of someone's curse.
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I grew up in the Carribeans listening to stories about some families that were cursed. The women were bound to these sinister creatures at birth and if they were to ever marry, their husbands will die untimely and horribly. No matter how sweet and great they were, they will succumb to their final moments, right before the deathly embrace in pure agony. As if the invisible creature tormenting them took great pleasure in taking their time and reducing them to wimps. My story Foley explores some parts of that. I was always fearful of stories like these, being cursed just because one's family was.
It felt as if Kevin unknowingly caused the demise of his fiancée by just being, well, Kevin. As he has his very own ghoul who will kill everyone around him but him for their sick enjoyment. The plot brought me back to my youth and engulfed me in the ambiance of storytelling like it should. To scare the little infant out of me. The plot was well paced and the action scenes, the killing spree, and tactics used by the ghoul were so convincingly well-structured and delivered.
Yes as a woman, I will implore you to do more research about victims of sexual assaults. If there is no magical element explained to cause the survivor to behave as though she was not raped just few days prior to engaging in a fueled consensual sexual intercourse is a complete disregard to all victims of sexual abuse.
Victims may completely rule out sex and become fearful of anyone that gets too close for comfort unless they receive proper therapy. They will replay the incident over and over in their minds and remain fragmented by it for years. They may also become promiscuous after a long period of denial, self-blaming, shamefulness, where it's on their terms and oftentimes it's not for sexual pleasure. Fix that please.
You have a great plot again it made me go back in time. Please do read the story over and get some new set of eyes to identify and fix the minor grammatical errors and run on sentences.
Overall great job!