A little hard to get through
I can kind of see where this book is going based on what I've read so far, but it was sort of difficult. I agree with other reviews about how it would be very helpful to have more spacing in paragraphs, more attention to grammatical errors, and especially quotation marks when there are different speakers. Also, I would probably recommend not posting chapters if they're not complete. Because of the editing notes in some of them, I almost didn't go to the end to see if there was anything actually written.
There is potential in everything, and I really think that with the help of a professional or even a friend or family member, it could get a little more fleshing out and focus on the plot, how the character got to where she is, and what's happening. I was feeling confused by it all, so I would highly recommend someone who knows what you're trying to write about to look at the book.
I look forward to seeing how the finished product turns out, and best of luck.
Read the story now