Gross! (but in a good way)
I enjoyed this story immensely. The cover picture had me interested initially and I definitely wasn't disappointed with the imagery in the writing. It was so gross! And I loved it. The author has a great voice, first person was the right way to go for sure. The only critique I have is that I didn't quite feel the urgency at the end, perhaps that was a stylistic choice but it seemed like there should have been more suspense.
All in all a supremely disgusting read and I can't wait to get into your other work!
Must. Read. More.
What is Inked? Where is Lux? Who the hell is Cole and why is he such an ass? HE BOILED HIS MOM??? These are all questions I've asked myself in the last few minutes since I finished that excerpt. As I read, the images conjured were like a dream though it read like a poem or a song. Very cleverly done. I don't even have a critique, just one more question...can I vote twice??Read the story now
“Firewatcher” has some serious shit going on! The little teaser blurb had me hooked right away and I loved that it was set in present day Earth as it made it more relatable and easy to get into. I’m certainly impressed. The writing itself could use a little tweaking. I found that the long scenic descriptions, though vivid, actually caused me to be pulled out of the story rather than into it. I felt like it was breaking up the action too much and could have been integrated a little more. As well, the characters and dialogue were a little cliché at times and at this point in the story I had trouble connecting with them. Other than that the writing is really smooth and it’s all round a pretty good read. Can’t wait to see more.Read the story now
Just a few words...
"Street Code" is an excellent preview of what is sure to be a great work. Though it's short you get a clear picture into the word the author is developing. However, I was a little thrown off by the pacing and structure. You seem to be thrown into the action in the middle only to have the character explain what happened in the beginning making the plot seem a little rushed and contrived.
Technically I think this piece could use some tweaking. There's quite a bit of repeated words and phrases as well as some strange sentence structure that gives it a rough quality. But overall I really enjoyed reading and taking in the vivid imagery of both the characters and the landscape..
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