Great Story, Just Needs Editing
I really love your plot and it is a really creative concept! However, there are various spelling/ grammatical errors that could be fixed by reading over it with a red pen. Though your formatting and style are a personal choice, so this may just be me, the frequent switching of point of view gets a bit confusing, particularly in the first several chapters. I am not against switching point of views or even going to as many as you did, however, having just a couple paragraphs in one POV before going to another and then another within one chapter threw me off, but it may just be me. Also, you might want to make POV Change Headers and "Time Passing" headers in a different font, bold, or with some other marker to make it stand out. Great Job!
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