dvonparker3x

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Sexy

Great read. Each chapter finishes nicely but also makes you want to read the next to find out what happens at their next encounter. Story progression is good and enough details about each character to really care about them. Personally I'm a big fan of the happy married couple scenario and it's done in a believable way.. All around very good. There are a few grammar errors, but nothing glaring or too distracting.

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Good short reads.

I felt that with each story your writing got a little better. The grammar and spelling for sure. Revisit "I'm not your teacher," good story with a lot of errors. Story one doesn't show up for me, you may want to look into that. "I've been waiting for you" was probably my favorite. The story telling is well done and the plot is great. It would make for a really good book, or at least more chapters. I think there are some really good ideas there. Very erotic with good character overall. Well done. Keep writing.

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Page turner

I enjoyed your writing style. Enough detail to paint a good picture but not so much that it was exhausting to read. The character were dynamic, Olivia was my favorite. Very sexual and seductive. I thought it was odd that they didn't take him to the hospital. Maybe have a better reason why they couldn't. Like a rock slide cut off the road to town. Solid story. Keep writing.

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Fun Tale

Really like your writing style. I enjoyed the thief's point of view and his character over all. Your descriptions set the scenes very well and never got too wordy or overdone. Was nice to see very few grammar issues, really makes it more enjoyable to read when you don't have to translate. Well done.

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Interesting Story Idea

The over all plot is very interesting. You have created a world with a lot of possibilities but the story was too short to explore them extensively. Good characters, some of the detailed description of their clothing was unnecessary and sentence structure was off in some places. I liked the twist at the end, very dark and unexpected. My biggest issue was the lack of editing. I found myself stumbling through sentences and rereading them. Cathy is Carter a few times. Overall a interesting story with some lore that can be expanded on.

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HOT

Great character development for a short story. Brit and Tom are believable tho I was surprised when Brit gets dominate near the end. Big fan of MFM so it was nice to see that. Glad it had a happy ending for all. I was afraid Des was going to be left out.
You should do a sequel for sure.
All your stories have been great. Keep it up.

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Fun and erotic.

The plot is fun and erotic. Great build up and character development, just a touch of drama. I really like the change in point of view, very dynamic. Good read. Ready for more.

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